Gals with 2U2 - tips for first few weeks?

RedDDD

I just found out last week that I am prego with my second so my little monsters will be 17 months apart...likely 16 months apart since I went very early with my first. I have been sort of stressing about those first few weeks and months where baby is eating every 2-3 hours etc. How did you survive it with a toddler? My plan is to stick to my little mans schedule as best as I can as far as eating and napping and bed times. It was just not that long ago that I remember being exhausted and hormonal feeling like I had no time to do anything else but feed/change/sleep. so any tips and suggestions on those first few days/weeks/months would be helpful. thanks!

ps:  sorry if this is a repeat but I looked thu the board and searched and didn't really find a question like this.  Thanks!

 

lew0509

DS 2 is 5 1/2 weeks old at this point, so I just lived through all of that. My advice:

1. Take whatever help you can get. It doesn't matter if they "do it the wrong way/not your way", as long as the baby is happy then you're fine.

2. Don't worry too much about a schedule for the newborn. Stick closer to your older child's schedule and kind of fit the baby's routine around that. With DS#1 I was allll about the schedule and trying to get him all figured and on a routine. With #2 I don't have the luxury of sitting in the nursery for an hour trying to get him to go to sleep. Do the best you can, and it's ok if the baby fusses for a little bit while you help older child.

3. In the first few weeks, do whatever gets you sleep. I was adamant that baby only sleep in a crib, not a RNP/bouncer/car seat so it wouldn't create bad habits, etc. Yeah...I never got to sleep. You can worry about that a little later on, but at first SLEEP.

4. Be prepared to have no idea what you're doing. I figured that everything would just come back to me since I JUST did this, but I was amazed at how little I remembered. I'm pretty sure I blocked out the first 6 months of DS's life. Also, what worked for your first may not work for your second.

5. If DH/partner wants to help, be specific with them. Do not expect them to know what you need or how to best be helpful. My DH will take the older child while I handle LO, the divide and conquer method has worked well for us.

6. Lower your expectations. If I get a load of laundry done and everyone gets fed (not including me), then I call it a win for the day. Don't expect to be able to do as much as you did last time b/c without fail, both kids need something at the same time, or if one's asleep you still have the other one up.

7. Shower at night, so that you actually get to

8. Your house will be messier than you'd like

9. It does get better, especially as you become less hormonal and kind of come out of the "postpartum fog"

Hope that helps, GL!

RedDDD

Thank you thank you!  All good advice

lew0509

Not a problem. And don't worry, it does get better. We've kinda fallen into a nice little routine and no one has lost their mind yet All I keep telling myself is that we're one day closer to being "out of the trenches"! (We're done after 2 kids)

LollyBug18

PP gave all good advice but I wanted to add that, for me, the 2nd time was a lot easier. I think a big part of that was thanks to being on Zoloft for depression. After DD, I was an insane, sleep deprived mess. After DS, I was just sleep deprived If you had anything close to PPD with your first LO, don't be afraid to discuss it with your doctor and see about being proactive the next time. Also, don't stress. Set low expectations until you get the hang of things and slowly work towards whatever your new normal will be. Our 2u2 was not planned but now that I'm in the thick of it, I'm absolutely loving it! GL!

MrsW80

Keep to your older child's schedule and work baby in to it. I worried so much about the logistics of everything, like how will I put DS1 down for nap with DS2 here. It just works itself out and all my worrying was for nothing. Also, the best advice I can give is not to get too worked up over anything because it will quickly change! And if they are both crying, tend to your older child first as long as its not urgent with the baby.

RedDDD

Thanks everyone!  Great points.  Your suggestions eased my mind 

Mommy2CB

All great advice! Thanks for posting ladies

dawson2010

This is very helpful to me as well! Thanks for the advice. My boys will be 13 months apart. Thankfully we are moving back home, so my mom will be helping with the older one alot.

One thing we talked about doing was really babyproofing the living room so that ODS can have some freedom without me having to jump up all the time. That way when I am nursing I won't have to worry as much.