Renewing of vows

cynnichinny13

So are there rules for renewing your vows? DH mentioned something about "...we could renew our vows yada yada.." I'm a pinterest addict so I was all over the idea. We wouldn't do it anytime soon, thinking a 5 or 10 year anniversary deal. 

Have any of you renewed your vows? Is it wrong to do it just because we want to, since we had a pretty big wedding and basically everyone was there.

I'm already pinning stuff ha! I thought I would gather some input from you guys for the hell of it.  

LuckyDad

I think before 10 years it reeks of either AWing or "oh god, our marriage is falling apart and we're trying desperately to save it" (see Vicki from Real Housewives).

After 10 years it seems like a nice excuse to have a big party.

NerdyMama2

Maybe soon, in a couple years.

SoDoMojo

LuckyDad:

I think before 10 years it reeks of either AWing or "oh god, our marriage is falling apart and we're trying desperately to save it" (see Vicki from Real Housewives).

After 10 years it seems like a nice excuse to have a big party.

This. My dad and ex-stepmom renewed their vows immediately before getting divorced.

DH has mentioned a 10 yr renewal at the same venue. And it is exactly like LD said - DH wants to party!  

Littledeer84

I kind of want to do it sometime, but more like take an anniversary trip and renew our vows with just us, not really another party or reception.

cynnichinny13

LuckyDad:

After 10 years it seems like a nice excuse to have a big party. 

That's where my head is at. We'll see if we still want to do it in 10 years. It is pretty AWy. But what girl doesn't want two days dedicated to her? And I get to wear a pretty dress. ::flips hair::

EastCoastBride

Vows don't expire.  And even 10 years is way too soon. 

And really- why does it need to involve anyone else?  I have friends who went to Hawaii for their 20th and they renewed their vows there.  Just the 2 of them on the beach.  That, I get.

I don't get the big production - especially at only 10 years.  That's not the test of time.

LadyXaverian

When we first got married, we talked about doing it for our 10th anniversary in Vegas. That was when we were still planning to never, ever have kids. Now, we're coming up on our 10th anniversary in September, and we're planning to TTC#2.

So now I'm thinking maybe at 25 when our kids are old enough to appreciate it (and be grossed out by it.)

catycate

I think it's kinda AW-y if you already had a big wedding- people have already celebrated you guys, KWIM? I think if you did it yourselves just to reinforce your love for one another, it's no big deal.

 

kwitt22

My friend just renewed her vows with her husband. Her husband is on his 3rd battle with cancer. So that's why they did it. It was very sweet and they both deserved it.

Smootchy

Heidi and Seal did it every year of their marriage.... Worked out for them.

Kidding.

I think renewing is cute, if done properly.... It's NMS, but if a couple for their 50th renewed their vows on a family trip in Hawaii.,. I could only wish to be part of such a thing.
A 5 or 10 year should probably just be the couples excuse to take a vacation together [no one else to really witness, done just for said couple]

EastCoastBride

kwitt22:

My friend just renewed her vows with her husband. Her husband is on his 3rd battle with cancer. So that's why they did it. It was very sweet and they both deserved it.

A true battle in life is something I can get on board with.  That or TRULY many, many years of marriage.  To use my words from earlier - years that really represent the test of time.

greeneyed_bride

I wouldn't do it personally, but if I wanted to, I think I'd just call it an anniversary party. Then we could say our vows again at the party, just for the heck of it, without making it a "second wedding" kind of deal. Also, I think 5 years is way too soon, and 10 years is borderline.

juniper19

Why not just have an anniversary party? Even if you've been married 50 years or someone just recovered from a serious illness. I don't really understand the point.

FrickandFrack

I always wanted to do it to celebrate our 10 year anniversary but that's creeping up too quickly so it'll probably be 15 or 20 years. I would like for it to just be family though and somewhere tropical.

EastCoastBride

GhostMonkey:

juniper19:

Why not just have an anniversary party? Even if you've been married 50 years or someone just recovered from a serious illness. I don't really understand the point.

God forbid people want to do a 10 minute ceremony. Is that really any worse than a couple long winded toasts at an anniversary party?

If someone wants to dress up, go for it. I bet you wouldn't judge them for getting a pricey dress to go to a hoity toity restaurant to celebrate. But buying a wedding dress- oh noes!

 

It's about involving other people. Celebrate your anniversary all you want w a nice dinner out, renew your vows on the beach alone. But when you invite people to a "ceremony" it becomes AWish. You got your wedding. When you got married.

Dunkin

We renewed our vows at 2 years, but it was kind of for giggles.  My DH suprised me with a trip to Vegas for our anniversary, and had my wedding dress shipped out to the hotel ahead of time.  He and I went to Elvis' wedding chapel and Elvis renewed our vows.  We wore our wedding outfits afterwards to dinner and on the strip.  People kept toasting us for getting married, and strangers were buying us drinks all night.  It was fun, but really just for us. We showed family pictures when we got back.  So I don't think that is what you were talking about in your post, but there you have it.

Kitiara5512

I think less than 10 years you dont really have jackshit to renew, unless you'd already considered a divorce by then, in which case I wouldn't be advertising that either.

EastCoastBride

Ghost monkey for someone whose trying to come across as so "easy breezy" about this, you sure are defensive and stooping pretty low.

And if this is the norm in your family, have at it. Why does it matter what we think?

klondikebar

The only way I could see DH and I renewing our vows is after a few decades of marriage on a whim while we were alone on vacation. I really don't care what anyone else does.

hopecounts

My grandparents had a vow renewal for their 50th anniversary and it was really sweet.

of course they got married during the tail end of the depression so they didn't have a real ceremony, they were married by the minister in my great grandparents house with my grandad's immediate family in attendance but that was it..

I feel like after 10 yrs whatever makes you happy, I probably wouldn't but it's just NMS.

Less than 10 yrs I'd side eye.  

jorkz821

KlondikeBar:

The only way I could see DH and I renewing our vows is after a few decades of marriagenbsp;on a whim while we were alone on vacation. I really don't care what anyone else does.

This is my thinking too. I've never been to a vow renewal party, is it a regional thing? I've only ever seen them on tv. John and Kate comes to mind.

J&A2008

NMS.  I would rather put the money towards an awesome anniversary trip. 

ridesbuttons

EastCoastBride:

Vows don't expire.  And even 10 years is way too soon. 

And really- why does it need to involve anyone else?  I have friends who went to Hawaii for their 20th and they renewed their vows there.  Just the 2 of them on the beach.  That, I get.

I don't get the big production - especially at only 10 years.  That's not the test of time.

I agree with this.

Renewing vows before a 40th or 50th seems kind of desperate to me.