Trying to decide if I should try for a third LO — The Bump

Trying to decide if I should try for a third LO

If you have three LOs how did you decide to try for the third. I thought I was two and done but recently I keep thinking more and more that I would like another one. My DH wants to have another one and says it is up to me. One concern for me is that I turn 35 next month and if I do decide to have another one I would like to start trying in a few months because this age is the latest that I would want to be pregnant. I have and almost three year old and a 4.5 year old. I feel like I am going crazy because I keep going from being certain we are done to wanting another one. I was even looking at maternity clothes online today.Embarrassed Any advice?

Re: Trying to decide if I should try for a third LO

  • we've decided to go for #3. Excited in some respects and nervous in others! If you scroll down the posts, look for the "mammas of 3" post that I added last week or so. good advice from some ladies there!

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  • We're probably 2 and done, but if I were to change my mind, I've always said that I would wait until my 2 boys are about as old as your 2 kids are.  I could never have a baby now.  They are 3 and 2 years old and I would go crazy.  But in a year or two, they'll probably be even more independent, maybe even helpful, and I think it would be doable.  For me, my kids seem to be pretty well-behaved so far.  They listen really well and rarely frustrate me.  If they did, I probably wouldn't want to bring a newborn into that.  So, if your kids are pretty easy, good kids, I say go for it.  IMO, they are at the perfect ages to get a new sibling. 
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  • I am also turning 35 next month and going back and forth about baby #3.  my girls are 3.5...I told dh we need to decide one way or the other by the time they turn 4 in may b/c I don't want to be over 35 starting to ttc again (knowing it can take a year...or more...)  I am so wishy washy...some days I am so ready to go with ttc (and these are the days dh is on the fence) and other days I am so happy to be done with all things baby moving on to the next phase of our lives...gah!  I really wish I had a crystal ball...sorry - no advice, but I am right there with you..
  • I had my youngest 3 weeks shy of turning 36. Age was a factor for us on having them so close together! My oldest is turning 7 in a few weeks, and my middle son just turned 5. I just knew I did not want to regret not having our third. I am sooooo glad we had him. He completes our family. While the idea of four has passed my mind, I do not want to risk it now that I am turning 40 this year. I have three awesome and healthy boys. I have found 3 to fit our family nicely too. Just a little bit less me/us time... but now that the youngest is 3, things are settling down even more!
    Boy 1 2/06 - Boy 2 12/07 - Boy 3 9/09
  • I'm trying to decide too. I go back and forth. If we tried for a third, I'd like to wait a year. 3 years apart was a good age difference for us.
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  • We're on the fence about a third child, too. I waver back and forth on this constantly. We always imagined that we'd want 3 kids and, in some ways, I don't quite feel done yet with two. On the other hand, I had 2u2 so I'm pretty worn out. Things are finally starting to get easier now that they're both a bit older and I'm not sure if starting all over again is the best idea.

    If we do have another, I think I'd like to wait until my kids are both in school at least part-time - so maybe one in preschool and one in kindergarten. I think that will make having a newborn again seem more manageable.  

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  • I'm debating this too. I lean toward really wanting to TTC a third; in our case DH is the one who is not at all sure about that. We're planning to decide for sure this spring.
    fraternal twin boys born january 2009
  • We decided to go for #3.  (my son will be 5 next month). I am 35 and will be 36 in a few months.
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  • I pretty much always thought I wanted only 2 kids, but immediately (as in while I was still in the hospital) after having my daughter (2nd child), I was just struck by the feeling that I wanted 3.  SO felt the same way within a couple months.  We waited for two years to see whether this was something we really wanted to do and our feelings remained relatively consistent.  I turned 35 in December and am due in May.  My son turned 5 recently and my daugther is 2.5.  For me, it did help to think about all the pros and cons over a period of time, as well as observing some families who had three kids.

  • I only have 2 so far but I do plan on a 3rd.  I am 35 (as of November) and because of that will be trying this year.  I always wanted more than 2 though. 

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  • I could have written this post myself! I am 35 with 2 boys; 4.5 and 3 years old. My hubs and I keep going back and forth, as well. I know exactly what you're feeling! Some days it's certain we are done and other days it's certain we'd like another. I know I won't regret it if we add another, however, I feel like I may in the future if we don't.

    Keep us posted! 

    Good luck! 

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