so stressed out

lauriebyronm

i just don't know what to do anymore! last Sunday we got rid of the pacifier. ds1 is taking it rough. it was taking less and less time to put him to bed which i though was great. last night he woke in the middle of the night but put himself back to sleep. tonight on the other hand is much different. i had things under control until dh came home from work and went into ds room and took him out because he was crying. so now i'm stuck dealing with ds while dh is sleeping. i don't know what i'm really trying to say, i guess i'm just annoyed dh comes home and thinks he knows what he is doing then goes to bed and leaves me to deal with it

ATMmom324

I would go wake up H.  Lie and tell him your son was asking for him if you have to.

lauriebyronm

we are going on 2 hours now of crying, my husbands exact words were " go see what's wrong with your son" i just want to cry

RondackHiker

lauriebyronm:

we are going on 2 hours now of crying, my husbands exact words were " go see what's wrong with your son" i just want to cry

I'd say "what's wrong is you took him out. Now you get to help."

He's asleep and you've been dealing for two hours? No. Not okay. He needs to get up now.

RondackHiker

So how'd the night end? I'm seriously side eyeing YH right now.

shopgirl78

I'm sorry its been so rough.  Did you take it aways cold turkey?  Or have incentives--binky fairy?   Maybe he just wasn't ready?  I'm sorry you H is being such a jerk.  We did cold turkey with DD (3)--actually she traded it for a band-aid.  The second night was worst that the first, but it was over pretty quickly.   DS1 didn't take a paci.  At the dentist, DS2 was highly suggested to lose the binky at 2.5 years.   I could see where it was messing with his teeth.  We did the bye bye binky method.  It used to be free but looks like its $10 now: https://www.bye-bye-binky.com/.  DS2 took the thick Gumdrop pacis.   And I started poking holes, the holes got larger and more frequent over the week.  There was a big huge hole on the day he threw it in the trash all by himself.   He never looked back.  Best of luck!  

 

lauriebyronm

RondackHiker:

So how'd the night end? I'm seriously side eyeing YH right now.

i'm so annoyed at him right now, it took from midnight till almost 230 to get him back to bed then he was up again at 6 & his is completely miserable

lauriebyronm

RondackHiker:

So how'd the night end? I'm seriously side eyeing YH right now.

h is still enjoining his sleep, i think i might get ready and take the kids and leave for the day

lauriebyronm

shopgirl78:

I'm sorry its been so rough.  Did you take it aways cold turkey?  Or have incentives--binky fairy?   Maybe he just wasn't ready?  I'm sorry you H is being such a jerk.  We did cold turkey with DD (3)--actually she traded it for a band-aid.  The second night was worst that the first, but it was over pretty quickly.   DS1 didn't take a paci.  At the dentist, DS2 was highly suggested to lose the binky at 2.5 years.   I could see where it was messing with his teeth.  We did the bye bye binky method.  It used to be free but looks like its $10 now: https://www.bye-bye-binky.com/.  DS2 took the thick Gumdrop pacis.   And I started poking holes, the holes got larger and more frequent over the week.  There was a big huge hole on the day he threw it in the trash all by himself.   He never looked back.  Best of luck!  

 

he was chewing pieces off, i had to take it away, we did cold turkey, its been a week

shopgirl78

lauriebyronm:

shopgirl78:

I'm sorry its been so rough.  Did you take it aways cold turkey?  Or have incentives--binky fairy?   Maybe he just wasn't ready?  I'm sorry you H is being such a jerk.  We did cold turkey with DD (3)--actually she traded it for a band-aid.  The second night was worst that the first, but it was over pretty quickly.   DS1 didn't take a paci.  At the dentist, DS2 was highly suggested to lose the binky at 2.5 years.   I could see where it was messing with his teeth.  We did the bye bye binky method.  It used to be free but looks like its $10 now: https://www.bye-bye-binky.com/.  DS2 took the thick Gumdrop pacis.   And I started poking holes, the holes got larger and more frequent over the week.  There was a big huge hole on the day he threw it in the trash all by himself.   He never looked back.  Best of luck!  

 

he was chewing pieces off, i had to take it away, we did cold turkey, its been a week

Yeah, it needed to go.  Hopefully, this phase will end soon.   

RondackHiker

So why isn't your DH helping? Does he know what you've been going through? I'm still stuck on this point.

What did you say and how did he respond when he brought DS out last night? Who put him back?

What did you say and how did he respond when he told you to check on DS last night?

Does he ever help at night? I can see where working longer hours might mean you take fewer night shifts, but this is his kid. He has to do the work.

I'm irked on your behalf and want to bring you a coffee and give your DH a nasty look. You need to talk to him and he needs to apologize.

lauriebyronm

RondackHiker:

So why isn't your DH helping? Does he know what you've been going through? I'm still stuck on this point.

What did you say and how did he respond when he brought DS out last night? Who put him back?

What did you say and how did he respond when he told you to check on DS last night?

Does he ever help at night? I can see where working longer hours might mean you take fewer night shifts, but this is his kid. He has to do the work.

I'm irked on your behalf and want to bring you a coffee and give your DH a nasty look. You need to talk to him and he needs to apologize.

i told him i had things under control and to not even go in his room it will make things worse. he didn't listen. he works and i stay at home with the kids so i do the majority of the work. he knew i was mad when he brou him out and i told him. he tried to bring ds in our bed after i told him not to. i ended up taking ds away from h and put him to bed, and it took me 2 hours to do it plus ds was up by 6 so he hasn't had much sleep.

lauriebyronm

lauriebyronm:

RondackHiker:

So why isn't your DH helping? Does he know what you've been going through? I'm still stuck on this point.

What did you say and how did he respond when he brought DS out last night? Who put him back?

What did you say and how did he respond when he told you to check on DS last night?

Does he ever help at night? I can see where working longer hours might mean you take fewer night shifts, but this is his kid. He has to do the work.

I'm irked on your behalf and want to bring you a coffee and give your DH a nasty look. You need to talk to him and he needs to apologize.

i told him i had things under control and to not even go in his room it will make things worse. he didn't listen. he works and i stay at home with the kids so i do the majority of the work. he knew i was mad when he brou him out and i told him. he tried to bring ds in our bed after i told him not to. i ended up taking ds away from h and put him to bed, and it took me 2 hours to do it plus ds was up by 6 so he hasn't had much sleep.

when he asked me to check on ds i told him i just did and it was his fault for brining him out to begin with. h is very lenient with ds and sugar coats things and babies him. i am a lot more firm at bed time

FrickandFrack

You need to have a serious discussion with DH about all this. It's not ok that he's undermining you with and in front of DS.