8 month old still not STTN

hdine22

My son hasn't slept through the night since day 1 - maybe one 4-hour spurt here and there (bad nap-taker too)

 

I've read The No Cry Sleep Solution - and tried a lot of the tricks she suggested, but I feel like we're too far gone for a gentle sleep-training method - and it literally pains me to admit that and think about it. I really don't like letting him cry. Especially now, when he sits/pulls up - he's very stubborn and would cry for hours - so I don't see it working either. I'd pick him up before he got too upset.

 We currently bed share most of the night - I give him a bath, lotion, we relax and I sway him to sleep. Put him in his crib for the first portion of the night (which he sleeps anywhere from about 1.5-3 hours) he wakes up, I try to put him back down in his crib (3-4 times I try), he screams, I take him to bed with us.

 When he wakes, he's usually not hungry - it seems as though he's still sleeping, but fussing - but if I leave him he wakes up and cries.. maybe transitioning through sleep-cycles? He eats a lot during the day - I think enough, at least - he's breastfed, and eats 2 meals of solids (plus a couple snacks) per day.

I just don't know what to do. He's up anywhere from  3-10 times a night. I can't take it.. I haven't slept a full night for 8 months. 

Anyone else? Advice?  What worked for you? I've been looking at Sleep Easy online, but I just can't get the nerve to buy and try it.

cltk12

I don't have any advice, but wanted to let you know you're not alone.  DS will be 8 months this week and gets up 1-2x's a night, but he eats quickly (bf) and goes right back down. He'll STTN when he wants to. 

I'd probably say I haven't had a full nights sleep for 10 months because for 2 months before delivery I was getting up to go to the bathroom 2-3 times a night

DCMerged

You're not alone - lots of posts on here at over at AP about this. I'm also trying NCSS for my 6 month old with no obvious progress so far.

meganandchase

At 8 months old, he should be able to STTN.  My DS didn't STTN until 9 months, but he was only waking up once, so it was more tolerable.  My suggestion would be to try a different method, try Ferber's book or Weissbluth's "Healthy Sleeping Habits, Happy Child."  Two-four nights of crying is worth it.

hdine22

Thanks for the advice, everyone!

I'm sure you're right, kbruington - It's just so, so tough letting them cry.If you don't mind my asking - what type of routine did you use at night? And you put him down, and left the room, no check-in's? I'm only asking, because I know going in would make my son worse too. And how long did it take your son? Just the 3-4 nights? Just curious!

Amanda2011

My baby is now 9 months old and we are in the same boat. At about 8.5 months things did get better. On Christmas Eve she slept 12 hours but has not done that since. She is up anywhere from 1-3 times a night. Much better than the 10-12 times she was waking up.

We did sleep easy but it has not solved all our troubles. She does wake less often but still hates bed time and naps. I just try to be consistent and tell myself she has to sleep at some point.  

sweetMay119

We are in the exact same boat! No advice here, bc I'm still not willing to let her CIO. We currently cosleep and are going to try her crib in our room soon.

mnb311

kbruington:

Not being mean at all but it sounds like you are all over the board when it comes to sleeping. Sometimes he's in his bed, or yours and that right there is confusing for a baby. Also, he KNOWS that when he cries, he will get his way every time. He screams when you lay him down in his bed because he knows that you will pick him right back up and take him to your bed! Sounds like you have tried sleep training but maybe weren't consistent so that is why it never worked.

I can't stress enough how consistency is KEY with sleep training. For sleep training, I let my LO cry. Straight up, plain and simple and after maybe 2 nights, he got the hang of it and stopped fighting it and fell asleep on his own. Even now when he has the occasional middle of the night freak out, I go rub his head but I don't pick him up. That makes everything worse. I love my child but I don't think that letting them cry is mean at all. Babies cry, that's what they do.

THIS!! The problem is that you're putting him in your bed in the middle of the night. He needs to sleep in his own room in his own crib. Sounds like he's having separation anxiety.  And consistency is IMPERATIVE. My son has STTN since 5 months old and I credit it to a consistent bedtime.  He did sleep in our room (in a pack n play)  until 6 months and the transition to his own room was smooth as molasses, I never had to do the cry it out method or anything.  He sleeps happily 11 hours straight. 

seunrine

I posted yesterday about this so you're not alone. However, I do have to agree with the bedtime routine and making him sleep in his crib. My son doesn't STTN but I believe that routine is good. 7pm is bath time, then lotion, pj's, either bottle or bf, read a book, in his crib. He puts himself right to sleep. He has a sound machine in his room that we use at bedtime only.

I have also read The No Cry Sleep Solution and didn't find it helpful only because my son puts himself to sleep. My problems arise after that. He's up all night. I've reached the point where I'm ready to let him cry but my husband isn't agreeing with me...so I'm still up all night.

As for check ins...I don't really feel like I have a choice. I've found him with his blanket wrapped around his head, his leg over the bumper hanging out of the crib...and somehow with wet pj's but a dry diaper. So...I feel like when he cries I have to at least check on him.

Know that you're not alone. We don't all have miracle babies that STTN

Suzanne68

I tried it all also. We are lucky if we get a 3 hr stretch. She has never slept we'll and naps are a fight. Just hope you know you are not alone and keep trying diff things. Not that anything I try works. I have not slept more than 2 hrs straight since I was 3 months pregnant. It sucks. Good luck.  

henrytviii

I am in the same boat.  I know  some people have pointed to being inconsistent and it doesn't hurt to try to put some routines in place but it may not work. Everyone who has a baby sleeping through the night gives me all sorts of advice and points out everything we are doing wrong but quite honestly I think there babies just sleep through the night because they were ready sooner.  My son has slept in his crib from his 3rd night home, my husband does bedtime every night in a very consistent way, we have an early bedtime, we put him down drowsy but awake, he can self sooth, he has a noise machine that signals night and a safe tiny knit blanket.  He's still up 4-6 times a night at almost 7 months and up for the day at 5am.  Usually he's hungry, sometimes he just needs comforting.  I go to him every time.  Maybe I am reinforcing bad habits like everyone tells me but I'm not ready to do anything differently yet and I want to teach him to trust that we'll be there for him always, even at 3am.

This is going to sound really lame but the only thing that made it a little better for me was to pretend that I enjoy the night wakings and try to look forward to them, same with the 5am wake-up.  I did this very deliberatly for a week about two months ago and convinced myself that it was true.  For some strange reason I am less tired, I still get 6 hours of broken sleep a night but I am happier. And I focus on the progress, we are at every 1.5 to 2 hours now instead of every hour. Yah!

jersangl

Mine s 6 months. I m starting tonight to let him cry t out. I have to or I will never sleep. Put headphones on. Hoping it only takes a few days