bedsharing to sleeping on own success stories

Ginny0211

Would love to hear some success stories! Friends and family think DD is going to bedshare forever or i'm going to have to do CIO. I'm hoping to be able to do a very slow and gentle transition and get her sleeping all by herself by 2 1/2. We're thinking about TTC #2 soon so I don't know how that will work out once a baby arrives if she is not sleeping on her own by then... 

TIA!  

 

TiffanyBerry

I'm pretty sure you'll be able to kick her out of your bed before she's 20.

That said - DD was in an attached cosleeper until ~9mo, our bed until ~12mo, a mattress on the floor next to our bed (with me in it too) until ~2.5yrs, and recently moved into her room (with me still mostly sleeping with her). There have been some times along the way that required some crying - mostly when she decided that she wanted to play with me there and I decided that I would stay, but only if she was making some attempt at going to sleep.  Whenever I left because she was playing, she would cry.  But she was a year and a half old; then it's a discipline issue.

As far as I know, DD is on the slow side about transitioning to her own room.

Jenny952

I don't bedshare all the time (DD is sleeping in her crib right now) but we do it when she's sick or going through growth spurts or when she needs me more, like recently when she's been teething like crazy.  She still goes down in her crib each night and I bring her into bed when she wakes up and won't go back to sleep.  I have not done any kind of CIO or sleep training.  I just try to follow a routine with putting her down.  Some nights she sleeps all night and wakes up at 7 in her crib.  Some nights she does wake up but can put herself back to sleep.  And then some nights she can't fall back to sleep on her own and that's when she comes into bed with me.  

I think that if it works for you and your family, bedsharing can be a great thing.  It's very helpful for nursing, especially when the LO needs to eat very often at night.  

As for TTC #2, you know there are lots of other times and places you and your DH can have sex... it doesn't just have to be in your bed at night.   

amatistajoy

DS slept in the crib next to my bed 1/2 the night, and in the bed with me 1/2 the night for months. We transitioned him to his crib in his own room at 14 months (moved from one to three bedroom apartment). There were... I count... 4 nights of transition. He woke up many times in the first night crying, and I would go in and rock him to sleep/doze with him until I could put him back in his crib. He never cried long since I always came to him. His amount of waking up lessened...and within the week he was sleeping straight through the night. He slept better than he had in bed with me since he was spending most of the night trying to find me/curl up to me and I kept trying to get away from him because he was waking me up haha.

Rhianna1981

We are still working on it, but it has gone well. My daughter has always been put down in her crib and then we would go and get her and bring her to bed with us when we went to bed. (I didn't want her in our bed--or even in the cosleeper-- without us in the room.) Now I just don't go and get her. If she wakes before 4am, I nurse her in her room, and then put her back in her crib. If she wakes after 4am, I bring her into bed with us for the rest of the night. It works for us with very little (if any) crying, and I have never really felt sleep deprived.

nosoup4u

With DS1, at 12 months he started sleeping on a crib mattress pushed against our mattress. He slept there for about a year or so. After I night weaned him at 20 months, we moved him to a toddler bed in our bedroom, and he transitioned with no problems at all.

DS2 slept on the crib mattress pushed against our mattress around the same age. We moved him to a twin mattress in our bedroom around 18 months, and he eventually got his own room a few months after that. DS2 was still waking up a lot after he moved into his own space, but he's now STTN for the most part (he's 26 months).

Just be patient and try not to stress about it. If it doesn't work right away, give it some time and don't be afraid to change what you're doing. Even if you get pg right away, you'll still have nine months to move your DD. hth!

Ginny0211

Thanks for sharing everyone! 

Very helpful to hear.

 

bandwife

We did a mix of bedsharing, crib/single bed sleeping (sometimes with DH or I in the single bed with DS) until 2.5 years.

Background: DS was a high needs baby and also had some health issues. The health issues were resolved right around 2.5 years and this is when he finally started STTN.

No CIO and right around 2.5 DS started going to sleep easy and on his own in a single bed. We have a night time routine, one of us lays in bed with him and reads a story. When the story is done DS asks us to go "sit down" meaning go sit in the chair next to his bed. We turn the lights off, hold his hand, and he is asleep in 5 mins.

FYI he was just going to sleep without the chair hand holding bit but DH started doing most of the bed times and loves holding his hand as he falls asleep. Would like for him to stop but I get that it's his nice time with DS (I'm a mostly SAHM and DH works outside the home).

For the most part DS, now 3 yrs 2 months, STTN 7pm-7am in his own single bed. I never thought we would get to this point but we did - YEAH!

PS. Was in same camp that I needed a break from bedsharing and a child that was mostly STTN before TTC #2. 

BabyButler2010

We bed shared until it seemed to not be working for us as a family any longer DS was about 2 and was all over the place throughout the night.. I think he was too hot and also too aware that "the milks" were right there. Anyway, we had tried to transition a couple of times and it didn't feel right for any of us so we went back to bed sharing. This time however, it was sooo easy. We talked a lot about his big boy bed and then I nursed him to sleep and he slept until 2am or so... It has been about 6 months and he still usually wakes up once in the middle of the night, but he has NO interest in sleeping in our bed. We've asked him to a few times out of comvenience for us, but he says no. Anyway, we look forward to him sleeping ALL night but even with our once a night wake up we are all getting much more rest. People always have an opinion, usually negative about bed sharing/extended nursing... Hot topics :. Do what feels right for you and your family... It is all that matters.

Sorry for typos I'm on my phone not super at typing on it :

Still free to be me

DD1 bedshared from about 4 months.  We sidecarred the crib when she was about six months old, but I slept in it as much as she did.  DD2 was born when DD1 was almost three.  Since then, DD1 has started sleeping...all over.  She sleeps in her "big girl bed," the crib, on the couch, in a nest on the floor...We just go with it.  We have never done CIO or encouraged her to sleep one place or another.  Also, she doesn't have any friends with their own rooms, so I don't know that it has even occurred to her that she isn't "supposed to" sleep with the rest of her family...