I guess I need to put out.

crazytowne

Sigh. A few weeks ago, I really thought my sex drive was back. Sadly, it was shortlived. My DH has been sulking all day and is "frustrated" with me because I say no... pretty much every time.

In my defense, he always wants to do it when I'm completely asleep, which I hate. But I guess I need to be a good wife and pretend like I have any desire at all. :

I just want to go to sleep!

kimmarie1105

I just keep giving mine Blow*%bs. Its quicker and easier when Im not in the mood. 

lifesadance

I say no need to fake a sex drive to be a "good wife." IMO, a good husband is understanding and loving, that includes when your pregnant wife has no sex drive. He can take care of business himself if he's really jonesin' for some.

I'm also not in the camp of women who do oral/BJs after delivery if I can't get any neither can he. :0

lou_lou_sd

I think many of us can relate.  You're certainly not the only one.

burneyonboard

I'm just the opposite.  My husband feels weird having sex since he can feel and see the baby moving.  He feels like he I'm the one with the sex drive. 

nyki06

As to the comment about him wanting to have sex when you're totally asleep, is that his thing or is he just coming to bed late and wants to wake you up for some sex? If he's waking you up with sex that's definitely not ok. Sorry, just had to throw it out there.

I wish my husband was a little more disappointed in my lack of sex drive, honestly. His has taken the plunge as well and between the two of us not being that interested nothing much is happening here. I think if he wanted to have sex I would feel more inclined to do it anyway and would enjoy it in the process (it's just the deciding to that's the worst part for me).  

brunstar

Yeah...I think we've had sex twice since Sept.

GeorgiaGirl1230

nyki06:

As to the comment about him wanting to have sex when you're totally asleep, is that his thing or is he just coming to bed late and wants to wake you up for some sex? If he's waking you up with sex that's definitely not ok. Sorry, just had to throw it out there.

I wish my husband was a little more disappointed in my lack of sex drive, honestly. His has taken the plunge as well and between the two of us not being that interested nothing much is happening here. I think if he wanted to have sex I would feel more inclined to do it anyway and would enjoy it in the process (it's just the deciding to that's the worst part for me).  

That's me too

skidderdo

Getting woken up for a sex booty call makes me irate. Especially since I'M the one who always wants to have sex, and DH is the one who is completely weirded out. I feel like the world is playing a mean joke once when that happens, "really? Really world? 2AM?!..... You suck."

JSS1002

I told DH that if he wanted it, he had to come to bed earlier or go for it at random times, like when we both get home from work.  That seemed to improve the situation -- I'm into it once we get started, but if you wake me up, I will cut you.

Ann003

lifesadance:

I say no need to fake a sex drive to be a "good wife." IMO, a good husband is understanding and loving, that includes when your pregnant wife has no sex drive. He can take care of business himself if he's really jonesin' for some.

Agreed.  We haven't had sex this entire pregnancy.  I was on pelvic rest up until 20 weeks for bleeding issues and have been placed on pelvic rest again due to contractions.  DH is very understanding.  Our anniversary is this weekend and I offered to give him a BJ, but he said it was ok.  Maybe I'll buy him a new porno instead.

Lulalala

lifesadance:

I say no need to fake a sex drive to be a "good wife." IMO, a good husband is understanding and loving, that includes when your pregnant wife has no sex drive. He can take care of business himself if he's really jonesin' for some.

 Amen! 

crazytowne

nyki06:

As to the comment about him wanting to have sex when you're totally asleep, is that his thing or is he just coming to bed late and wants to wake you up for some sex?

I'm a morning person and he's a night owl.  I go to bed between 9 and 9:30, and he goes to bed after midnight.  No creepy sleep-sex here!

 

JSS1002:

I told DH that if he wanted it, he had to come to bed earlier or go for it at random times, like when we both get home from work.  That seemed to improve the situation -- I'm into it once we get started, but if you wake me up, I will cut you.

I have totally said that -- "let's do it at 7pm when I want to and I'm not sleepy yet" but he never wants to.  We've been together for almost 9 years, and we have had this same fight every 2 years or so.  I think he just got used to when we were TTC and had sex every 2-3 days.

Also, his kids from his first marriage live with us full time and they keep us stupid-busy with extracurriculars.  I'm just tired of the same old fight.

JSS1002

crazytowne:

nyki06:

As to the comment about him wanting to have sex when you're totally asleep, is that his thing or is he just coming to bed late and wants to wake you up for some sex?

I'm a morning person and he's a night owl.  I go to bed between 9 and 9:30, and he goes to bed after midnight.  No creepy sleep-sex here!

 

JSS1002:

I told DH that if he wanted it, he had to come to bed earlier or go for it at random times, like when we both get home from work.  That seemed to improve the situation -- I'm into it once we get started, but if you wake me up, I will cut you.

I have totally said that -- "let's do it at 7pm when I want to and I'm not sleepy yet" but he never wants to.  We've been together for almost 9 years, and we have had this same fight every 2 years or so.  I think he just got used to when we were TTC and had sex every 2-3 days.

Also, his kids from his first marriage live with us full time and they keep us stupid-busy with extracurriculars.  I'm just tired of the same old fight.

We are the same way - I go to bed early and get up early; he goes to bed late and could sleep all day.  We JUST had this conversation teh other day where he said "I think I just got so used to doin' it every other day when we were trying to get pregnant."  And that's when I said "Hon, we can have sex EVERY day if you want, but if you wake me up, I will kill you, and I'm totally not into it."   

Luckily, he understands that, and is generally undersatnding about my exhaustion lately, so we just do it at weird times -- right after work, saturday afternoons, etc...

 

 

tondraluv

kimmarie1105:

I just keep giving mine Blow*%bs. Its quicker and easier when Im not in the mood. 

Tell it sister! 

minerswife17

I feel like an alien! My husband and I never lost any of our drive not complaining though!!! Lol

Monsieur_et_Madame_Ha

crazytowne:

I just want to go to sleep!

Amen! 

wendalsue

I don't think either of us are interested.  I bet we've done it 3-4 times since the BFP in August.  I suggested it last night and regretted it for the most part.  It wasn't enjoyable no matter what position we tried.  I feel swollen down there and had a constant feeling that I was pushing against him...it was weird.  I also felt like I was straining myself trying to use stomach and back muscles that I haven't been using.  I guess if we did it more often this might not be an issue, but when it's this daunting of a task, who wants to do it more often??  It made me feel sad.

ShaunaSmith79

nyki06:

I wish my husband was a little more disappointed in my lack of sex drive, honestly. His has taken the plunge as well and between the two of us not being that interested nothing much is happening here. I think if he wanted to have sex I would feel more inclined to do it anyway and would enjoy it in the process it's just the deciding to that's the worst part for me.

This

Salliejabl

After reading the comments,I'm glad I'm not alone. I felt like I was the only one who had no sex drive.  I feel bad for DH but I just don't have the energy and my 1st trimester symptoms never went away which makes it difficult.

JanessLynn

lou_lou_sd:

I think many of us can relate.nbsp; You're certainly not the only one.

Yes, this.

none5

On several occasions I have offered to get him a hooker

UberBiz

Luckey4:

I feel like an alien! My husband and I never lost any of our drive not complaining though!!! Lol

Haha, same here! And I also don't mind middle-of-the-night sex either, it's actually some of my favorite. I told him if he just keeps poking me and I start responding, that's a good thing, lol.

ChicagoBulls

Luckey4:

I feel like an alien! My husband and I never lost any of our drive not complaining though!!! Lol

Same here! I feel like I come on to him more than he does me sometimes! lol I need it!

Since I'm usually pretty burnt out by the time we go to bed, I'll sometimes try and initiate it a bit earlier like when we're on the couch watching TV so that we both still have some energy and we don't have to have "lazy sex". lol

Monsieur_et_Madame_Ha

JSS1002:

I'm into it once we get started, but if you wake me up, I will cut you.

That pretty much sums me up, especially the "I will cut you" part.