Itty bitty, teeny tiny update on CS issue and DC

CFjo2010

And by itty bitty, teeny tiny I mean: No one is telling me what happened at the CS contempt hearing on 12/10.  I'm still getting the weird, random amounts deposited into my account a few times each month so I know DC's paying something whether willingly or unwillingly.  The amounts don't add up to the monthly amount he's supposed to pay, but it's definitely more than the $0 he's been paying the last 7 years.

Despite the CS and court drama, the kids actually received Christmas cards from DC and SM, as well as Gma.  They all sent the kids gift cards and VISA cards, which is a major improvement.  In the past, the gifts the kids received from DC and his family were usually cheap little knick knacks that broke immediately, or clothes that didn't fit.  So the clothes would end up getting donated to our Church and we would go buy the kids new clothes.  They refused to send gift cards or gift receipts, claiming they thought I would use the gift cards and return the gifts to get stuff for myself.  Yeah, they're total peaches.  So this year when the kids got their cards they were super excited.  I had them call DC to thank him and say "Merry Christmas", and my son willingly got on the phone and talked to SM, Gma and DC.  This may not seem like a huge deal, but considering my son has refused to speak to DC for the last 5 years it was a major breakthrough. 

I'm hoping (genuinely hoping with all my heart) that DC is changing his ways and that maybe, just maybe, a healthy relationship can start forming between him and the kids.

karleegirl

Wow that's an improvement.

Holly_1007

sounds like things are slowly improving! when is the court hearing about his visitation? are you still going to go for supervised visitation?

and I can't believe no one will tell you what is going on! that is crazy!

CFjo2010

holly71087:

sounds like things are slowly improving! when is the court hearing about his visitation? are you still going to go for supervised visitation?

and I can't believe no one will tell you what is going on! that is crazy!

Ugh. The CS agency in TN isn't communicating with the CS agency in CA. Since I have Dcss handling the matter, the CS agency won't speak directly with me. It's incredibly frustrating and beyond annoying.

I had the visitation hearing continued to February so that I would have info about the contempt hearing. Before I'm willing to discuss any sort of visitation I need to know what consequences TN is sanctioning DC with. Has he been threatened with jail time? If so, under what conditions? Will I be notified? I'm not going to let the kids go out there if he's going to potentially be in jail. Plus I want strict conditions put in the CO that if DC, or anyone mentions or discusses the CS issue with the kids then only supervised visits/phone calls will be permitted. I have a feeling I'm going to have to just have this Summer's visit take place here in CA to gauge DC's reaction and behavior regarding the CS matter and if he lets it impact his interaction with the kids. 

Phantomgirl

They refused to send gift cards or gift receipts, claiming they thought I would use the gift cards and return the gifts to get stuff for myself.

Azzholes!

I'm happy for the kids and nervous.  It may be better to have no contact then to have sporadic contact.  Fingers crossed!