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Feeling guilty but lucky to have my TTCALers

miakritamiakrita
in TTC After a Loss

Hello Ladies,

I've been here for a few months now and I just realized that I have a pattern of bumping:  at least once every cycle I take a hiatus because I feel as though TB is just making me a crazier TTCALer. 

But today has been by far the hardest day and I feel so lucky to have this board to turn to.  I woke up to a temp drop which made FF change my O date (so now I am 13 DPO instead of 17 DPO).  All this was followed by a BFN and then later by some spotting.  Now I'm sitting here in a total funk with AF-caliber cramps.

Call it the CD1 blues.  All I know is that I feel lucky to have you all.  I'm sorry my participation is so spotty.  But I hope you'll still have me?  

Mother to 3 angels: D&C May 2006 - My cherry blossom child. TTC since March 2012. BFP March 2012; CP March 2012 - 4 weeks 1 day. BFP July 8, 2012; No HB August 6, 2012 - 8 weeks 2 days. M/C August 21, 2012. Cremated in our backyard 5 days later. Starting charting 10/29/12. Stalk me at My Ovulation Chart
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Re: Feeling guilty but lucky to have my TTCALers

  • RachaeleighRachaeleigh member
    We all have times in which our participation isn't the greatest. Its ok, we understand

    4 Losses (2003, 2008, Apr 2012, & Oct 2012)
    All RPL and IF testing with multiple REs = normal

    5 IUIs = BFN

    All AL are welcome
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  • buggirl72buggirl72 member
    (((hugs))) and I'm sorry for the BFN and temp drop.  I think we all can understand the need to step back - especially when it is to maintain your sanity.

    The day the Bump died - Jasper is wise
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  • miakritamiakrita
    Thanks for the understanding and support, Rachel and Buggirl.  Sorry to be all AW today.  J&J, I'd love to have you as a cycle buddy.  I was just stalking you and it seems like we might have about the same follicular phase length.  :)
    Mother to 3 angels: D&C May 2006 - My cherry blossom child. TTC since March 2012. BFP March 2012; CP March 2012 - 4 weeks 1 day. BFP July 8, 2012; No HB August 6, 2012 - 8 weeks 2 days. M/C August 21, 2012. Cremated in our backyard 5 days later. Starting charting 10/29/12. Stalk me at My Ovulation Chart
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  • miakritamiakrita
    imageBethelgal42:

    Sorry you are  having a rough day today.  Don't feel bad for taking time away. I think we all do that from time to time.  TTCAL can be pretty overwhelming.

    {Hugs} Sorry for CD1.  I hope she leaves quickly and takes a nice long vacation.

    :)  You are so sweet.  Thanks Beth <3

    Mother to 3 angels: D&C May 2006 - My cherry blossom child. TTC since March 2012. BFP March 2012; CP March 2012 - 4 weeks 1 day. BFP July 8, 2012; No HB August 6, 2012 - 8 weeks 2 days. M/C August 21, 2012. Cremated in our backyard 5 days later. Starting charting 10/29/12. Stalk me at My Ovulation Chart
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  • heather52904heather52904 member
    [HUGS]. Sorry for the BFN.

    TTC Since 8/2011
    BFP #1 5/13/12 * EDD 1/24/13 * MC at 7 wks 4 days on 6/11/12
    BFP #2 5/13/13 * Current EDD 1/23/14

    Baby N born 2/8/14


    imageimage

    Lilypie - (HD7B)

     

     

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  • jenn0021jenn0021 member
    I'm sorry for the temp drop and cramps. TTCAL is so hard. Sending you big ((Hugs)).
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    Started TTC June 2010
    BFP #1     07/04/10. EDD 03/14/11. Missed m/c 08/09/10. D&C 09/27/10. }Casey & Jaimie{
    BFP #2 01/14/11. EDD 09/25/11. Missed m/c 02/18/11. D&C 02/24/11. }Dustin{
    TTA for 18 months and then TTC for 12 months
    BFP #3 08/18/13. EDD 04/30/14. Missed m/c 09/25/13. D&C 09/26/13. }Daylin{
    TTA for 7 months
    Jan-Mar 2014 - RPL, SHG, karotyping: all results normal
    TTC Again May 2014
    Progesterone & baby aspirin combo for 5 cycles     - All BFN's
    SA with DNA fragmentation = Perfect results
    Diagnostic cycle monitoring = Polycystic ovaries leading to premature egg release
    TTA Oct 2014 - Jan 2015
    Jan 2015 - Medicated cycle with timed intercourse
    Image and video hosting by TinyPicImage and video hosting by TinyPicImage and video hosting by TinyPic   

    My Blog: The Canadian Housewife    PGAL/PAL Welcome    My Chart
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  • mightymousymightymousy member
    Sorry for your bfn :( *hugs* FX for you for this next cycle :)
    BFP#1 9/28/2012 - EDD 6/3/2013 - MMC discovered 11/21/2012 @ 12w2d - D&C 11/24/2012
    BFP#2 4/4/2013 - Born at 37w3d on 11/26/13 via emergency c-section
    Loving our beautiful rainbow baby boy Archer!
    image

    ~*All AL Welcome*~
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  • miakritamiakrita

    Thank you Heather, Jenn and MM for the support. 

    J&J, you have a friend request from me on FF :)

    Mother to 3 angels: D&C May 2006 - My cherry blossom child. TTC since March 2012. BFP March 2012; CP March 2012 - 4 weeks 1 day. BFP July 8, 2012; No HB August 6, 2012 - 8 weeks 2 days. M/C August 21, 2012. Cremated in our backyard 5 days later. Starting charting 10/29/12. Stalk me at My Ovulation Chart
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  • GavinRonansMomGavinRonansMom member
    I am sorry for the CD1 and BFN...TTCAL is such an emotional road and we all understand needing to take a step back. GL this cycle
    image Noah Michael, born sleeping 9/29/12 at 19w 3d. We love you forever Little Man! image
    image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    BFP: 2/4/13 EDD: 10/11/13
    BabyFruit Ticker
    Patiently waiting for Buggirl to join me!!
    Beta #1 11dpo:89 Progesterone:38.9 Beta #2 18dpo:1940
    HB seen at 6w HB 8w 5d 176bpm! Its a BOY!
    grow rainbow grow!!!!
    All Always Welcome!!
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  • miakritamiakrita

    imageGavinRonansMom:
    I am sorry for the CD1 and BFN...TTCAL is such an emotional road and we all understand needing to take a step back. GL this cycle

    Thank you Smile

    FX for you, too <3

    Mother to 3 angels: D&C May 2006 - My cherry blossom child. TTC since March 2012. BFP March 2012; CP March 2012 - 4 weeks 1 day. BFP July 8, 2012; No HB August 6, 2012 - 8 weeks 2 days. M/C August 21, 2012. Cremated in our backyard 5 days later. Starting charting 10/29/12. Stalk me at My Ovulation Chart
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