well, I figured out OBs plans... not pretty. (vent. kind of long)
dande2129
member
Some of you may remember that I had posted about the feeling that my OBs were pushing toward an unnecessary c-section based solely on ultrasound measurements and uterus-feeling measurements alone as a predicted "big baby," while everything else (BP, etc) are absolutely perfect.
I took advice that others gave me and I spoke with one of the OBs that I see about why they are scheduling these 3rd tri ultrasounds. After she measured my uterus and felt the baby, she said that I was measuring just a hair under 37 weeks, and confirmed that I have an ultrasound scheduled in two weeks.
Then, here's the kicker--- she says, "That's going to be the time where we start talking about a c-section. If this baby is consistently measuring ahead, there's a high likelihood that you won't be able to vaginally deliver him, and it's not fair for you or the baby to go through hours and hours of labor and pushing just to find that you need a c-section." Um, disagree?
I told her that while I understand their position in wanting a healthy mom and baby, that I will not consent to a c-section on the prediction of a large baby alone. If a medical necessity arises, by all means, cut him out. Otherwise, sorry folks, we'll be trying this the old fashioned way.
I'm surprised that they went STRAIGHT to a talk of a c-section. If they are truly that concerned that the baby is too big, why not try to suggest induction at official full term?
I feel like I'm in for a long battle of sticking to my guns. I know that by these standards alone, they cannot force me to have a c-section and they also can't drop me. ACOG guidelines don't include a "possibly big baby" as a medically necessary c-section, unless I have that part wrong. Someone correct me.
So frustrated. Sigh. Thanks for reading.
Re: well, I figured out OBs plans... not pretty. (vent. kind of long)
I would be very frustrated if I were you, there is no way I would consent to a C-section because they were estimating that baby would be big. Good for you for questioning their plan and sticking to your guns.
ETA: My cousin's "huge" baby was less than 7 pounds. She was also told that she was making no progress and would end up going past due...she delivered 2 weeks early. I put very little stock in size estimates and cervical checks.
1/12/13 DD was born
4/9/16 DS was born
9/17 CP
6/23/18 BFP EDD 3/4/19
I also have a friend that was in a similar situation as I am in now, and her "huge" baby was roughly 7 lbs also.
With DS, they had my due date messed up by two weeks. When I tried to tell them that there was no possible way he was due two weeks later, they told me that they knew best, and the early ultrasound (that was done by a med student, mind you) was the most accurate. So, not surprisingly, he and I were measuring ahead pretty consistently. They started talking about the same shiit as these crazycakes OBs, but I had the means to fire them and go another route. Either way, I successfully vaginally delivered a baby that was 7 lbs 7 ounces on the day before the CORRECT EDD. We went home the next day.
So, I'm with you. I don't put much stock into size estimates whatsoever. I'm just really praying that this baby will take one for the team and give the middle finger to these OBs and come on his own.
Stand your ground! My first 2 boys were 7lb er's and took 2-4 hours to push them out. Last one really pushed for me to get a c-section -her office was relocating and it was convenient. I really think she was spiteful and didn't show up during my induction until I had pushed for 4 hours and no progress. Fast forward to 3rd don--new, awesome OB was at the entire labor, did not push for a section and within 20 minutes I pushed out an 8lb 10 oz boy. Easy peasy.
My best friend is probably 105lbs soaking wet and delivered 2 babies in the 10lb range vaginally. Size shouldn't really matter.
They make more money off of c-sections, and it is a lot faster for them.
FWIW, I labored for 27 hours with a big baby and he was delivered by c-section. Would I do it again? Yes. But I would probably wait until I went into labor naturally instead of being induced--it wasn't a matter of him being too big, my cervix just never dilated enough. He was 10lbs 4oz. So with my last pregnancy and this one I have no choice. My second c-section was, of course, a lot easier to recover from because I hadn't labored first but that first one was not the end of the world. I am glad I tried.
DH's cousin who is about 5'8" but only a size 6 delivered an 11lb 3oz girl with just 3 pushes. You can do it!!!
I am so sorry you are going through this! Stick to your guns, having a C-section just because they're estimating a big baby doesn't seem like a good idea to me (I don't know your medical history or anything, but if the estimates are the only factor they're using, that doesn't seem right to me)
Last time they estimated my son would be well over 9 lbs and I had two extra growth scans, but my doctor never pushed a C-section. FWIW I had a natural birth and my son was only 8 lbs 10 oz, not tiny, but not as big as predicted.
"It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness." - Eleanor Roosevelt
Yep. And good for you for sticking to your guns! That's outrageous
These comments were all very encouraging--- thank you.
I don't have much support on this, except through FI, who has been amazing at advocating for me and baby and supporting my decision to not sign up for a c-section/induction just on these measurements alone. I guess in the end, that's all that really matters is how FI and I feel. Luckily, he will be at the appointment in two weeks when they try and talk about a c-section more.
As a side note, it's also amazing to me how people put so much trust in doctors as if they aren't people too--- as if they don't want to cover their ass, deliver a baby conveniently and in a timely manner and still be home for dinner.
Sorry, this is probably going to be too long and personal, but this subject strikes a nerve in me...
This was me two years ago with my son. Unfortunately I was not as aware with what was going on and didn't feel as though I had a choice. DD was 13 months old at the time, vaginal birth 8lbs 14oz; we had just moved (around 7.5 months pregnant) from MA to TX, so new doctor, new hospital, no family/friends around, etc.; and they started telling me right away I looked like I was carrying too big. They scared the junk out of me at my first growth ultrasound when the tech turned white and ran out of the room to get the doctor, who returned and said baby was measuring off the charts and they couldn't get an accurate reading, but he was close to 13lbs with 3 weeks to go. He said he would be very nervous even considering a vaginal birth and the outcome for both me and baby. Well, I was scared, it worked. We scheduled a c-section and I delivered DS at 38 weeks 9lbs 15oz. - I was so disappointed, emotionally disconnected to the whole experience, and felt like an idiot for not questioning the doctor because I know I could have pushed him out. To make matters worse I was remembering the day I gave birth to my daughter, being able to hold her immediately and only giving her up for a few short minutes while they cleaned and examined her... I cried and cried because with DS I gave him a kiss and then they took him away, I couldn't hold him at all nevermind skin on skin. Then he was sent to the nursery, DH back to the waiting room, and I was sent alone to recovery for 2 hours. It was a total nightmare that I was not prepared at all for emotionally. Once I made it to my regular room, DH met me, and we looked at the few pictures he had taken... my son was still not there. The nurses told me timing was just bad and this was the time every night the babys got bathed, checked, etc, etc., and they would bring DS in after -- I didn't see him for 4.5 hours after birth, no complications.
This time around I know a lot more about my options, my doctor, the area, etc. Sadly where I live people love to sue doctors, so the quality of care is not what it should be. My doctor is one of two in the area that will even consider doing a VBAC because a year ago someone ended up having complications and dying, the family sued the doctors, hospital, and anyone else they could. So when I brought up the topic of a VBAC I was told "Yes I will do them, but no you are not a good candidate. DD was a pretty big baby, DS was very big, and this baby looks to be big too. Having a larger baby increases your risks and I just don't feel comfortable with that." So again, I feel pushed into a corner without options, but at least I know what to expect.
GL, keep fighting for what you believe. It is your decision to make, not your doctors.
Meanwhile I am an insulin-dependent diabetic pregnant with my 2nd child. I was induced the first time at 39 weeks due to pre-e, and will *definitely* be induced again this time around. (I wound up with the c-section in the end as DS was in distress and they were concerned about me having a stroke. I was fine with the decision.)
When I asked my OB about a c-section this time around, he said it was my call. If I want to try for a VBAC, he is all for it, so long as we have optimal conditions. If i want to go right ahead and schedule the c-section, he will do that too. Unfortuantely, I am concerned that my rising blood pressure is going to be the reason we go right to the c-section, but I have to say that "big baby" would NEVER be an acceptable reason right off the bat.
(FYI my brother, who is 22 years old, was almost 10 lbs at birth!! My mom tried for hours to push him out and then they finally realized that it wasn't happening. That's when she had her c-section ... but nothing was planned out.)
Make informed decisions and DO NOT let doctors push you around!!!
WOW. Thank you for sharing your story.
Thanks Mama. Good for you for staying strong in knowing what is best for you and baby. C-section or vaginal delivery, it's never a decision that should be made on a whim or someone feeling pressured by their doctor.
The more I hear from ladies from the bump, the more empowered I feel that I am not just a crazycakes pregnant lady. It truly is refreshing.
I have been visiting the Bump boards this pregnancy but have not been posting like I did with my first, but I wanted to offer my experience because your post touched a sore spot.
With my DS I planned a natural childbirth, attended Bradley classes, hired a doula, and was all set to deliver vaginally. At 36 weeks I started hearing the large baby talk. Then my doctor announced she would be out of town around my due date and wanted to induce early. I refused and was sent for a 39 week ultrasound which predicted an off the charts big baby. I consented to some additional monitoring and attempts to soften my cervix to speed things up at 40 weeks. Despite the fact DS was looking healthy, he had plenty of fluid, and was moving fine the doctor suggested I schedule a c-section before she left. I refused again and she went out of town leaving me with her substitute.
I consented to schedule an induction at 41w5d and prayed that I would go into labor first. I didn't and showed up at the hospital to discover my doctor's sub had scheduled a c-section not an induction. I still refused to consent and was sent for another ultrasound where they claimed the baby was in distress and meconium was in the fluid and that I had to have a c-section immediately. The sub doctor only came in to tell me that I could consent to surgery or walk out of the hospital AMA. Finally, in tears, I consented and then discovered the "emergency" nature of my c-section was greatly exaggerated as I was forced to wait 5 hours for the doctor to finish her morning appointments before performing my surgery.
My son was 10 lbs 14 oz at birth. He was never actually in distress and there was no meconium in the fluid, but he was big (and 12 days late). According to his pediatrician, DS was the healthiest baby he had every seen. It took me a long time to recover emotionally from that day. And even though my c-section recovery was straight forward I still cannot believe doctors consider major abdominal surgery a reasonable way to deliver babies unless as a last resort.
My point in sharing my story is to say that you have to be able to trust your doctor because in the end your doctor has a lot of power. I was unfortunate in that I did not go into labor before 41w5d and that was as long as I thought I could safely hold out without risking my baby. After that I was at the mercy of the doctor. I would advise you to really talk to your doctor and make sure you are on the same page. It is one thing for your doctor to be cautious and try to offer options but you should be on the same team in the end.
I later learned that I was not the only patient that had a distressing encounter with my doctor's substitute and she no longer sees patients. However, after my experience with DS I just didn't have it in me to fight it out with my current pregnancy and have scheduled my 2nd c-section for 39w4d.
Thank you for sharing your story! I read the entire thing (but have only quoted the above to shorten the quote-tree) and that is one of my greater fears also. If the doctors truly want to perform a c-section, they'll do it and I will be left defeated.
How did you ultimately discover that the baby was not in distress? I am assuming that they inspected the fluid and there was not a presence of meconium, but if there was something else, I'd love to hear it.
The hospital where I delivered DS was so kind. I wish that my insurance allowed me to deliver there again. My water had been broken 14 hours before I arrived at the hospital, and had not a single contraction or any sign of labor before then. Therefore, I was technically induced, and that scared the shiit out of me, but they put me on the lowest dose of pit at the biggest interval to gradually induce me. I kept looking at the clock, expecting them to start talking about a c-section when it had been 24 hours and still no sign of baby. They never mentioned a c-section. It was 32 hours from my water breaking to DS being born, and not once did someone mention a c-section. I believe they did give me antibiotics through the IV somewhere around 24 hours just to be cautious, but otherwise, they were so encouraging.
Sigh.
I was technically induced with DS. My water broke on it's own, but labor never began. I agree that being induced can be exhausting on your body over natural labor, but I'd rather take the chance of maybe needing a c-section as opposed to going straight for a c-section without trying.
I can also understand both sides as well; and that's why I had told the OB that I spoke with yesterday (there are 4 rotating OBs in the practice) that I understood where they were coming from. Either way though, a big baby is not cause for a c-section, and that's my main concern.
I'm sorry you're dealing with this. It sounds like you are probably in for a fight but good for you for doing what's right!
Just to share my experience (where the outcome is still unknown but I am also preparing for a possible battle). At 24 weeks, my fundal height was 29 so my midwife sent me for a growth ultrasound. Our baby measured in the 98th percentile and some perinatologist whom I had never met before that moment came in to talk to us after the u/s and IMMEDIATELY jumped into the "if he continues to grow like this, it'll be a c-section, big babies just aren't meant to be born vaginally, etc.etc." Excuse me, who the heck are you to jump to these conclusions? I was pretty upset after that meeting.
We had a second growth scan at 32 weeks and met with a different perinatologist this time. Same result, 98th percentile, if he keeps on track with an average gain of 1/2 pound a week based on their weight estimate at that time, we're looking at right around a 10 pounder. This time our chat was very different, she was just like "he's a big baby, so what?" No mention of c-section or inability to try vaginally. I'm with you, if there's some medical indication or complication during labor, by all means, cut him out, but until that point I very much want to TRY vaginal birth first.
So our official report sent to the MWs from the second perinatologist says she would be comfortable with a "trial of labor" (I hate that term, it feels to me like they're just letting me "try" to appease me but already resigned to the fact this will end in a c-section). We have one more ultrasound at 36 weeks and then we'll have the big talk with the midwives about what our plan will be. The one we met with most recently already was telling us all the scary possibilities and risks of trying to vaginally birth a large baby and how c-section may be the better choice, and it's starting to eat at me a bit. I understand their need to set realistic expectations (that I may have complications that are risky for baby or end in c-section), but I've been working hard to keep a positive mind about natural birth and not let negative thoughts and worry creep in, but that's impossible to avoid now.
Hopefully our next report (I purposely scheduled this scan with the same peri as last time and not the crazy one we saw the first time) still supports a 'trial of labor" but maybe it won't and I don't look forward to the discussions that will follow if that's the case. Some of the stories in this thread are quite scary (the one with a c-section scheduled instead of an induction, wth?!). This got long, sorry. I just wanted you to know you're not alone in this situation of having c-section brought up fairly prematurely in reference to a supposed big baby.
Good luck to you in doing what's best for you and your baby!
And to also add to the physician who commented that there ARE dangers to birthing large babies, I actually agree. And I understand that most times doctors have no way of knowing who is going to be fine and who is going to have problems. However there are also dangers and major side effects for the mother having abdominal surgery that doctors seem to discount as no big deal. Csections should be a last resort and women should be told exactly what they are getting into.
I am glad my son is healthy but I paid and will continue to pay for that surgery and my upcoming one for the rest of my life. No matter how smooth your recovery you don't just return to your former self after having your core muscles cut through. I regained some core strength through a lot of work and P90X! but I never got back to where I was before. Of course maybe I should blame pregnancy and increasing age, too! Ok, done with my soapbox.
Good luck and be at peace with whatever happens. In the end, after being annoyed for months over people telling me to just be happy I had a healthy baby, all that matters now is the 2 year old sitting next to me with his head on my shoulder wondering why momma is still playing with her phone!
This is why I say that I can understand both sides of the argument. I know that there are risks to vaginal delivery with babies of any size, really. L&D is a risky business, period. If it wasn't, then rarely would things go wrong.
I'm not scared of hearing the risks because no matter how the baby comes out, there's a risk involved. But am I going to decline a major surgery based on two ultrasounds? Yep.
I do appreciate your advice and shedding light on the other side of the argument though. That's something that FI and I had to discuss also, and will probably continue to discuss until he's here.
I could hug you for this entire post and sharing your very personal story with me.
I read this to FI, who, luckily, is a Paramedic. While he's not an OB, he is trained in L&D and can request specific vitals, see evidence of distress, etc. When I read him your story, he said that he will be asking for all of that if there is pressure for a c-section that isn't an immediate emergency. On the same note, I understand that there are seconds between life and death, so either way, it's not something that should be entered into lightly, but also not something that should take too much time stewing over. I hope that I will be at peace with whatever outcome happens, and if it is a c-section, well, then at least I tried everything I could to vaginally deliver.