Blended Families

Quick help.

I dont know if you all remember my last port of BM keeping my SD when we were suppose to have her. Well a week later she gave her to us, but now is wanting to come pick her up tomorrow, and it is still our time to have her. What do I do? Our lawyer said not to hand her over that we get to keep her since it is court order and our lawyer and the "court person" who handles visitations cases had made an agreement because she chose not to hand her over. Have any of you been in this situation before.? If you have what did you do? Thanks.!

Re: Quick help.

  • If it's your time - you keep her.  If you give in to BM and allow her to say, "Oh, I want her back" for no apparent reason, and you just hand back your SD, she's going to play you.

    Stick to the CO

    "he offered her the world. she said she had her own" - poet Monique Duval
  • image+just+j+:

    If it's your time - you keep her.  If you give in to BM and allow her to say, "Oh, I want her back" for no apparent reason, and you just hand back your SD, she's going to play you.

    Stick to the CO

    All of this. 

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  • What if she shows up to our house. She knows her dead beat boyfriend is not to step foot in our property. What do I do then.? Call the police and say what? Because I know for a fact she will call them and say we are kidnapping her daughter.
  • Do what your lawyer and the court officer told you and keep her.
    No one else will ever know the strength of my love for you. After all, you are the only one who knows what my heart sounds like from the inside.
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  • image+just+j+:

    If it's your time - you keep her.  If you give in to BM and allow her to say, "Oh, I want her back" for no apparent reason, and you just hand back your SD, she's going to play you.

    Stick to the CO

    And have a copy of the CO available for quick reference. Also, notify your atty. if she shows up so s/he can consider the next move (contempt...?) 

  • This!
    No one else will ever know the strength of my love for you. After all, you are the only one who knows what my heart sounds like from the inside.
    image






  • imageJniagara:
    What if she shows up to our house. She knows her dead beat boyfriend is not to step foot in our property. What do I do then.? Call the police and say what? Because I know for a fact she will call them and say we are kidnapping her daughter.

    You are not kidnapping her if it's in the CO that it's YOUR time with the daughter. Let her call the cops. When they show up, calmly and politely hand them the CO. 

    "he offered her the world. she said she had her own" - poet Monique Duval
  • image+just+j+:

    imageJniagara:
    What if she shows up to our house. She knows her dead beat boyfriend is not to step foot in our property. What do I do then.? Call the police and say what? Because I know for a fact she will call them and say we are kidnapping her daughter.


    You are not kidnapping her if it's in the CO that it's YOUR time with the daughter.

    Let her call the cops. When they show up, calmly and politely hand them the CO. 



    The police wouldn't do anything anyways. They will tell her that this is a family court matter and if she thinks you are breaking the CO then she will need to file contempt in family court. You can't kidnap your own child.

    If it were me and she showed up at my door, I would tell her I was calling the police because she is trespassing, and that she can have SD back at the scheduled time. If she didn't leave I would call the police. Having that on record can only help you.
  • imageSimpleJane:
    You can't kidnap your own child.

    Actually, you can kidnap your own child if you are deliberately keeping her from the other parent. It's up to that parent to prove that you are, and in some cases it's clear if you run off and do not tell the other parent where you are going and break deliberate rules in the CO, but this is not even near close to that kind of thing.

    I'm dying to hear how this one turned out.

    DId you call her bluff? I hope so. You need to nip these situations immediately and not let them think that they can continue to play you like this. Or they will.

    "he offered her the world. she said she had her own" - poet Monique Duval
  • imageJniagara:
    What if she shows up to our house. She knows her dead beat boyfriend is not to step foot in our property. What do I do then.? Call the police and say what? Because I know for a fact she will call them and say we are kidnapping her daughter.

    1), you do not allow her into your home.  Don't answer the door.

    2) if she persists, call the cops.  If she calls them first, then when they show up you present them with paperwork showing it is in fact your COURT ORDERED visitation time.

     Get something in writing on your lawyer's letterhead stating that he spoke to the "court person" about BM keeping DD longer than she was supposed to, and about how when SD was finally handed over, this is how the visitation was worked out.  Present this to the cops.

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  • How did things turn out?

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  • Well things were a mess. Her boyfriends threatened to come over here and "** us up". So we called the police right away. They said since it was a court order that they had to go by what they saw. Meaning we were suppose to get SD the week before christmas like court order said and not the week after like her mom made it out to be. So in the end we had to hand her over. Our lawyer already went to file for contempt so there really wasn't much we could do. But to hand her over and speak to our lawyer about this. She did how ever tried to go to the police department and have my husband arrested, but they did no such thing as they were already aware of the situation. Now we are just waiting for monday so we can can Court and have something done about it . AGAIN..... We were so mad over this but now its just up to the court and see what they say....
  • Oh no!! Good luck tomorrow (today)! T&P!
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