1 year old hates sleeping alone

bunniekrissy

I would like to hear how other AP mamas approached difficult sleeping habits with their older babies. LO was a decent sleeper as a young infant, but by 8 months  he was starting to refuse to go back to sleep in his crib after waking, etc. Now at 1 year after months of multiple night wakings and bed sharing out of necessity, he typically sleeps for 1-3 hour stretches after being nursed/rocked to sleep and often refuses to go back in his crib after 1-3 am. I really do like bed sharing, but I'd rather not before 5 am or so because I get so uncomfortable lying in the same position for hours.I know it's normal for babies to still wake at this age, but getting it down to 1-2 night feedings/wakings would be nice...

Anyway, I really don't want to do CIO, which I've always been against, but it is becoming challenging having very little time alone with my husband, let alone such broken sleep. So if you were in a similar situation, did you do any kind of sleep training? What worked to help your LO sleep better?

resilient61

DH refused to cosleep from the beginning, but after a virus at 10m that woke him several times a night for 2 weeks, DS1 refused to go to sleep without nursing or cosleeping, even after the virus was gone.  We ended up doing it in his bed (yes, I climbed in the crib).  Usually just having me there was enough to calm him, but oftentimes he wouldn't fall asleep until nursed.  Once he fell asleep I'd go back to our bed & everyone was happy, though tired.  We moved him to a toddler bed at 15m, and from then until now (at 2.5 he's in a twin bed) hewill come to our room in the middle of the night a couple of times a week, so we go back to his room & I lay with him until he falls asleep and again return to my room.  I couldn't let him CIO, but with DH refusing to cosleep, this was the solution that has worked best for us.

bunniekrissy

Climbing into the crib with him to nurse him has occurred to me! Maybe I will actually try it, and then there's no putting him down to wake him up.... Thanks for replying!

mpstochlinski8

I have twins, one is a decent sleeper up 1-2x a night and the other is up every 1-3hrs like yours and if I don't nurse him back to sleep he cries and gets more and more upset if I don't nurse him so for months now I have just been nursing them back to sleep (besharing) so I can fall back asleep too. I feel like if I kept the LO who sleeps worse in bed with me he'd probably sleep all night and just latch on now and then but I don't think its fair the my other LO if I do this. Since they were born I've been sleeping in the nursery between the two cribs so I could be close to them and nurse them, I always thought I'd do this til they sttn at least since we dont have room in our room/bed to beshare with twins. anyhow, Im not a fan of CIO for me personally, I have tried it a couple of times out of desperation when LOs just wouldnt go back to sleep in the middle of the night after several hours of being up with them trying everything but I couldnt do it to "sleep train" them. It breaks my heart to let my LO cry when I could try to help avoid this. I dont get a good nights sleep and it makes me crabby sometimes but what has helped is just laying down and fallin back to sleep as I nurse them back to sleep. I agree its not a great sleep and its uncomfortable being in the same position for so long but it beats staying up to sit and nurse lol Once LO is fully asleep again at some point I usually wake up and put them back in their cribs.Is your LO getting a bottle or nursing for those middle of the night feedings? sorry if Im not much help but you aren't alone, hope it gets better for you!

NYGirl02

Gosh, I could have written this post word for word. Literally. I don't have much advice. I'm sort of trying to start jay Gordon's night weaning, all though not following it perfectly. DD often doesn't seem to need to nurse at night anymore. Just wants snuggles. It's so flipping sweet, but so uncomfortable to lay like that all night. Then, she eventually gets very wiggly.  If I have the energy, I try to get her back in the crib, but its a 30 minute ordeal and it usually doesn't work. I don't want to do CIO, and my husband has an even harder time trying to do CIO.  So we are in the "this too shall pass" stage. I'm hoping to TTC soon, and if she doesn't start STTN before baby #2 comes, I will transition her to a twin bed and hopefully lay with her in her room to help her back to sleep...then eventually make it back to my bed with just me and my husband. We will see. I do let her fuss for a few minutes, but it usually escalates to full on scream.

ncbelle

Have you read the No Cry Sleep Solution?  I think that's a good place to start.  FWIW, this age was the most wakeful for both of my kids - they slept MUCH better once it passed!

bunniekrissy

It's comforting to know I'm not alone. I keep seeing posts on Facebook about all the hours people's 3 month olds are sleeping and I'm a little jealous ... but then I remember E slept 6-8 hours straight (briefly) at that age too. I thought we had an easy one, lol!

I have just started reading the No Cry Sleep Solution.

 

NYGirl02

Good luck! The NC nap solution worked wonders for us. I read the NCSS when I was pregnant and tried to put a lot of the tips in effect from early on. Hasn't worked great for us, but it is still a good read. I think there is a toddler version that I might pick up.  All though, I am happy to report my DD STTN the last two nights! It's a miracle!