crying for no real reason

megann831

Occasionally DS will start crying while playing, he's not tiered or hungry, just wants to be picked up or is bored of what he's doing.  He can crawl, but I guess he'd just rather be carried.  DH will leave him screaming on the floor, I pick him up as soon as I can get to him.  DH says we should let him cry so he learns he can't always be carried, I just can't leave my baby sitting on the floor crying.  I do wind up carrying him around alot.  What are your thoughts on this?

mben1119

Well, if he's bored, he needs a new activity or to be in a different room. I agree with both of you. I wouldn't rush to pick him up right away, but I wouldn't leave him there either. Do something to cheer him up. Babies need to be stimulated.

FemShep

When a baby is bored, or needs help, or wants a change of scenery, they cry. It's the only way they have to communicate, and ignoring their cries just teaches them that what they feel doesn't matter. 

jeffsjayme

FemShep:

When a baby is bored, or needs help, or wants a change of scenery, they cry. It's the only way they have to communicate, and ignoring their cries just teaches them that what they feel doesn't matter. 

Why doesn't it teach them that what they feel shouldn't always be obeyed?  Like if you feel like you want to eat a cookie, it doesn't mean you should eat a cookie.  Or if you feel like hitting someone, it doesn't mean you should hit someone.

I think it's funny how people just know what babies are always thinking.  Don't pick him up?  He'll start to think you don't love him.  Don't pick him up?  He'll start to think that he can be independent and learn to play on his own.  Everyone has their own ideas on what they think baby is thinking.  There's no way to know.

For us, I pick him up when his crying persists.  Since he's crawling and standing up, he's crying alot more.  Sometimes it's serious because he legitimately fell over and bonked his head or ran into a table leg (he's not that great at judging distances yet).  When that happens, I definitely pick him up and comfort him.

But if he cries because he isn't sure what to do next, I let him cry a bit.  It isn't a heavy cry, but a fussing crying.  Sometimes, I talk him him like "You can get down or just turn your body.  You can do it."  I know he doesn't understand me, but he is acknowledged.  Most times, he figures it out.  But if he does keep crying, then I show him how to fix himself.

If it's truly boredom, then it's on to the next activity. 

kalette

My LO was doing this when she developed an ear infection.

hopefulmom81

jeffsjayme:

FemShep:

When a baby is bored, or needs help, or wants a change of scenery, they cry. It's the only way they have to communicate, and ignoring their cries just teaches them that what they feel doesn't matter. 

Why doesn't it teach them that what they feel shouldn't always be obeyed?  Like if you feel like you want to eat a cookie, it doesn't mean you should eat a cookie.  Or if you feel like hitting someone, it doesn't mean you should hit someone.

I think it's funny how people just know what babies are always thinking.  Don't pick him up?  He'll start to think you don't love him.  Don't pick him up?  He'll start to think that he can be independent and learn to play on his own.  Everyone has their own ideas on what they think baby is thinking.  There's no way to know.

For us, I pick him up when his crying persists.  Since he's crawling and standing up, he's crying alot more.  Sometimes it's serious because he legitimately fell over and bonked his head or ran into a table leg (he's not that great at judging distances yet).  When that happens, I definitely pick him up and comfort him.

But if he cries because he isn't sure what to do next, I let him cry a bit.  It isn't a heavy cry, but a fussing crying.  Sometimes, I talk him him like "You can get down or just turn your body.  You can do it."  I know he doesn't understand me, but he is acknowledged.  Most times, he figures it out.  But if he does keep crying, then I show him how to fix himself.

If it's truly boredom, then it's on to the next activity. 

I am not trying to be argumentative, although that is how it is going to come out, but a baby crying is different than a baby or kid wanting a cookie.  Crying is an emotion to be responded to.  Wanting a cookie is not a direct emotion.

You don't pick your LO up, but you are still attempting to pacify him by encouraging him with your words, so basically you are acknowledging his discomfort and helping to fix it.

I agree with this idea of trying to talk to your LO first.  Maybe they are overstimulated by their toys and need most of the toys removed from the area and just have 1 easy stuffed animal around.  Or, like PPs said, maybe try a different toy and just talk calmly to LO and see if they settle.

If all else fails, I say pick 'em up, but I am a coddler  

 

jessandandy09

FemShep:

When a baby is bored, or needs help, or wants a change of scenery, they cry. It's the only way they have to communicate, and ignoring their cries just teaches them that what they feel doesn't matter. 

I agree with this 100%.  I think when you teach a young baby that  what they have to say matters to you, they feel more secure that their needs are met and they cry less.  When you have an older child, you have to start teaching them restraint from others answering their boredom.  Doesnt work that way with a baby .

Still free to be me

In my opinion, being bored is a perfectly legitimate reason to cry...