Feeling Stuck

farmgirlmommy

I was married before for 7 years and we had a child...we divorced after he cheated on me several times.  I was single for many years then got married 8 years later..that was 2+ years ago.  My current husband and I have a 16 month old and I just found out I am pregnant again.  Right after we got married he stopped trying, his jealousy became out of control and we never do anything together.  He only spends about an hour a week with our LO and he does nothing with my oldest.  My family helps me when I need but he and his family do not.  I don't know how much my life would change without him around.  I wouldn't have to worry about making him happy, which takes alot of energy.  

My 19 year old sister died in september and he was jealous of people sending me text or FB messages offering condolences.  Horrible.  It was the last straw and that was the beginning of the end.  I have told him it was over at least 4 times but he is so dense he thinks he can "try" for a few days and everything is fine.  I was waiting until after the holidays to totally end it then I found out I am pregnant.  That baffles me too...I make him use protection....btw, yes we still have occasional sex...it is good!

 So now that I am pregnant he thinks we will stay together but I just don't love him anymore.  IDK what to do.

kristak53

This sounds like he is an abusive man... They go through cycles of honeymoon periods and then they blow up and then back to the honeymoon and then back to blowing up again. I'd try and stay strong and keep the split up permanent, but that's easier said than done. I know because my ex is an abuser (mentally and emotionally) and he is still living with me (not paying any bills as he'd done since we moved in together almost 2 years ago) so I am happy to have him around as a watcher of my son when I need to clean or do things like that... So I am in a similar situation.

If you can, look for a women's center in your county and see if they can offer you some help. I found one and they have me going to group counseling sessions and individual counseling sessions for free and also helped me with my custody stuff for court. They were a godsend, but I still can't find the strength to let go of the baby help with him being here even though everyone knows I need to boot him from my home. Feel free to PM me and we can compare notes if you want. I am happy to offer my history if it may help you.

Good luck and keep your head up. I know all of us will support you in whatever you choose.