Why does my MIL want to feed my baby?

Sarelnad

I dropped little one off at my MIL's house and when I get back she had fed him the emergency bottle already. I wasnt even gone two hours and he had just eaten when I dropped him off. WTH? Not the first time this has happened.

Sarelnad

The only reason this bothers me by the way is because I EBF and try to give him as few bottles as possible. She knows this

elfchique

Do you really not get it? 

Do you love taking care of your baby? Yes. For a multitude of reasons, but also because caring for an infant helps bond the caregiver to the baby. Your MIL has at least one child, but I'm guessing it's been a while since she's loved a baby like her own son. Cuddling your sweet son, reminds her of the memories she has of being a young mother with her own son. Someday you will be in her shoes. Fondly remembering what a magical experience it was to cuddle and hold and snuggle a tiny infant. And I hope your DIL is nicer to you than you are being right now. 

Starry Again

People are obsessed with feeding babies. I don't get it myself. But I accept it. Next time maybe don't leave a bottle if you know the baby is full?

leannsiiple

My MIL does this also. I FF tho so it's not that big of a deal that he is drinking out of a bottle but it is a big deal that she trys over feeding him just because he makes a sound. She also says he needs water which drives me nuts because he does not. FIL put a cookie in DS's mouth to suck on while I wasn't around. Needless to say, they are off of the babysitting list for a while.

The_Jen626

elfchique:

Do you really not get it?nbsp;Do you love taking care of your baby? Yes. For a multitude of reasons, but also because caring for an infant helps bond the caregiver to the baby. Your MIL has at least one child, but I'm guessing it's been a while since she's loved a baby like her own son. Cuddling your sweet son, reminds her of the memories she has of being a young mother with her own son. Someday you will be in her shoes. Fondly remembering what a magical experience it was to cuddle and hold and snuggle a tiny infant. And I hope your DIL is nicer to you than you are being right now.nbsp;

Don't you think this is a little over the top? Of course people like feeding babies...but I'd be upset too if mil "wasted" a bottle of my pumped milk. I think most nursing mothers would be upset about this.

Sarelnad

elfchique:

Do you really not get it?nbsp;Do you love taking care of your baby? Yes. For a multitude of reasons, but also because caring for an infant helps bond the caregiver to the baby. Your MIL has at least one child, but I'm guessing it's been a while since she's loved a baby like her own son. Cuddling your sweet son, reminds her of the memories she has of being a young mother with her own son. Someday you will be in her shoes. Fondly remembering what a magical experience it was to cuddle and hold and snuggle a tiny infant. And I hope your DIL is nicer to you than you are being right now.nbsp;

Seriously, who peed in your cereal this morning?

elfchique

Sarelnad:

elfchique:

Do you really not get it?nbsp;Do you love taking care of your baby? Yes. For a multitude of reasons, but also because caring for an infant helps bond the caregiver to the baby. Your MIL has at least one child, but I'm guessing it's been a while since she's loved a baby like her own son. Cuddling your sweet son, reminds her of the memories she has of being a young mother with her own son. Someday you will be in her shoes. Fondly remembering what a magical experience it was to cuddle and hold and snuggle a tiny infant. And I hope your DIL is nicer to you than you are being right now.nbsp;

Seriously, who peed in your cereal this morning?

No one peed in my cereal. But you asked, "Why does MIL want to feed my baby?" I'm telling you why.  

elfchique

The_Jen626:

elfchique:

Do you really not get it?nbsp;Do you love taking care of your baby? Yes. For a multitude of reasons, but also because caring for an infant helps bond the caregiver to the baby. Your MIL has at least one child, but I'm guessing it's been a while since she's loved a baby like her own son. Cuddling your sweet son, reminds her of the memories she has of being a young mother with her own son. Someday you will be in her shoes. Fondly remembering what a magical experience it was to cuddle and hold and snuggle a tiny infant. And I hope your DIL is nicer to you than you are being right now.nbsp;

Don't you think this is a little over the top? Of course people like feeding babies...but I'd be upset too if mil "wasted" a bottle of my pumped milk. I think most nursing mothers would be upset about this.

True. I didn't think of this.  

katiekate_ga

wonknessmonster:

I don't know but mine is the same way. She also wants to give her water in a bottle and I'm like NO NO DON'T. For pete's sake she's not dehydrated! 

My theory is that she can't stand LO crying. 

ETA: LO's crying breaks my heart too, seriously, but I really feel like my MIL thinks the answer is always food, and she has made plenty of comments that EBF is somehow not enough for my baby. Which is why this is a problem.  

My MIL does think that my (BF) daughter always needs to eat because she is fussy with her because my MIL is disabled and has to sit to hold her and DD wants to move around.  

She also will cry if my DS (2.5) is crying even if it is because I tell him he can't have something or being put in timeout for hitting. It drives my DH crazy...and me.

JoNi2010

I think if any of the other family members could, they would feed my LO too, but I nurse and he only gets the bottle when I am working or out without him.  But yeah, it annoys me when my parents does not ever call me to see how far from home I am (or they do not pick up the phone when I call) and will just give him the bottle too.  I think it's partly because they don't like him crying (he is inconsolable when he is hungry) and because they just plain like to feed him - another thing they can do with him.

Yeah, it's annoying as heck because it usually means another pump session for me, and more bottles for me to clean... but I figure it's harmless and they're my free sitters for now so I just put up with it.

BabyLouWho

Grandparents love feeding their grandbabies.  They LOVE it.  Just as it is a bonding experience for you to feed your baby, it is a bonding experience for them to feed the baby too.

Starry Again

lolol I must be the worst BFer ever because I could really am not all that into the bonding part. I mean it is nice and all but she eats such a small portion of the day that to me there is plenty of other time to bond with her. 

If I FF I can pretty much guarantee I would not give a crap who fed her. I wouldn't care now if I had enough of a supply to have a bunch of milk frozen. 

jlmumma

Starry Again:

lolol I must be the worst BFer ever because I could really am not all that into the bonding part. I mean it is nice and all but she eats such a small portion of the day that to me there is plenty of other time to bond with her.nbsp;If I FF I can pretty muchnbsp;guaranteenbsp;I would not give a crap who fed her. I wouldn't care now if I had enough of a supply to have a bunch of milk frozen.nbsp;

This is exactly how I feel. Can't wait till I have enough freezer stash to where I can quit BF. I love the health aspect and the calm baby side of BF, I'm just over everything else!!