Jealous or...?

moonrose2715

Mobile: jealous or...?

There's this woman who works with my husband. She had her first baby about a month after I had DS. She has already left her LO overnight for fun, given up breastfeeding for convenience, and is all over fb talking about going out, currently out at a local bar. She is still out on maternity leave.

I'm finding myself getting a little judgey. Don't get me wrong, I don't think any one of those things are flameworthy but they are starting to add up to me questioning her commitment to her child.

Is it just me being jealous, which I fully admit I am a little, or am I the crazy one for not feeling ready for all of those things? Or is it in fact a little on the extreme end of less attachment? To be clear I know she loves her baby and am not questioning that. And it is none of my business, I'm just questioning how crazy or jealous vs justified in my reaction I am.

hboo2011

Eh. I don't know.

If my folks offered to keep K overnight now, I'd let them. I wouldn't ask just for shiits n giggles though. Maybe she had someone who offered to give her a night out.

Stopping Breastfeeding? I would never judge. I stopped at 3 weeks bc it sucked and I haven't had an ounce of regret.

I don't write status updates on fbso no comparsion, but if she did it before and it's normal, I don't see an issue. I have gone out one night almost every weekend since having her, either with dh (K w my parents) or just the girls. Her going out, I wouldn't judge that either.

Maybe some people think I'm not attached to my LO bc of this. But if she's also out on maternity leave still, it obviously is her only time away. Some people need it. I do. And I'm beyond attached to my kid. It helps me miss her and want to come home at 10:30 on a Saturday just to watch her in the monitor :-)

Mrs.G123

Sounds like you know done random facts about this person but nothing else. Why are you judging her?

The_Jen626

So is her baby a month old now?  Meh...I mean I might judge a little bit, but it sounds like you don't like her for other reasons already.  What's the history between her and your husband?

I go out "a lot", I'm a SAHM with a workaholic husband, so it helps me to stay sane to have some time with my girlfriends and a break from BFing and poopy diapers.  I'm sure some people probably judge me, but I know I'm a damn good mom, so I'm not worried about it lol... I've been "out to a bar" about 10 times in almost 3 months.  If MIL offered to take my kids overnight I would be ALL ABOUT IT.  I'd love a night of absolute quiet and sleep!

Also I will be leaving both my kids in April for 2 nights to go to my BFF's wedding in Napa Valley.

Sarelnad

You sound a little judgy, not jealous. Sorry to say, but that's my opinion. 

Something I have realized: parenting isn't epic for everyone.  They can keep up their pre baby charades without batting an eye. It doesn't mean they aren't good parents.  

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kplaxco85

mbm1983:

Both. Dont worry so much about what other mothers do. Just worry about yourself and your baby.

This. If you and your baby are happy that's all that matters.

Ziegeficker

I would be pissed if someone "questioned my commitment" to my son because I spent a night out without him.  That's absurd, honestly.

Besides, nobody posts on Facebook about all the nights they spend up with their screaming baby or the sh!t they clean off their walls or the fevers they nurse...they post about fun things.  So bear that in mind.

We mothers deserve fun lives, too.

nealbl

Each person is different

I did not let DD stay away overnight until she was 2.

We rarely go out to where we would need a babysitter. Our friends have kids so we usually hang out at eachothers houses. DD#1 was 2 months old before we even left her and that was just for a vday date and we were back in a few hours. 

This time I had to leave her much sooner due to night school. Also my DD#1 stays at my parents almost once a week. They all love it and honestly it gives DH and I some time to focus on #2 and then on eachother.

I wouldn't leave my LO that early if I didn't have to but that doesn't make it wrong.

I don't care what her reasons are for giving up BFing that is her choice and she doesn't have to have a good reason to not do it.  

expectingnugget

Well I suck a big one because I just made plans to go out and get drunky with my college friends on New Years while my SO watches Ike. And I am seriously STOKED. I'm pumping like a crazy person and counting down the days. I want to feel "normal" again for just one second and I feel no guilt at all because I take dang good care of my baby and love the shiz out of him.