How rude is this?

rp-chicago-mom

Back story:
My BFF from kindergarten has no family. Her mom passed away and her dad is criminally insane. Ever since she lost her mom, she has spent the holidays with us. Last year she started dating this guy she met on Facebook. I haven't met him but have a feeling he's bad news given the stories she tells. That's neither here nor there though. Also she's in her rotations for med school and spent the last six weeks in Oklahoma.

Story story:

So I invited her to our festivities again and she never gave me a clear answer. I got that she was busy with school so let it go. Then she came back and still wouldn't say if she was coming. If she were to join us my parents would have to prepare a guest room and my family bought her gifts so she wouldn't be staring at the rest of us. We go to my MIL's for dinner tomorrow and she wanted to know if she was coming. H and I have a small gtg for boxing day and she also has not told us if she's coming.

IF she had joined us tonight, she would have met us at the 4:00 mass tonight. I got a text at 4:15 saying she wasn't coming, [I saw it after. I wasn't texting in church!] she was spending the night at her bf's house but she might stop by my parents' in the morning and we could probably count her in for Christmas dinner at MIL's.

So...is this mad crazy rude or am I overreacting?

Manda-Kay

Very rude especially since your family got her presents and wants to have a guest room ready for her

Jnmac83

I vote rude and inconsiderate.

mamahawk12

Definitely inconsiderate. Did you tell her why you needed to know whether or not she was coming? Or just simply ask if she would be there? Either way, she absolutely should have given you a timely definitive answer but perhaps she didn't realize the effort being made on her behalf.

WhitEm14

I vote rude. She should have RSVP'd in a timely manner so plans could be made. Especially for a big day like Christmas where there is so much involved.