- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Blended Families
Nineoceans
member
BFR New Years Resolutions?
Nineoceans
member
Hey ladies thought we could start off the new year right with some blended fam resolutions.
Mine is to ask myself "does it fulfill me spiritually or mentally" before I do or get upset about anything.
Specifically I am going to stop checking Bm's Facebook page. It doesn't fulfill me to know what shes doing and I can actually rest assured whatever she is doing would either annoy me or worry me so what's the point in knowing the details?
Whenever I get the urge to check her Facebook or dwell on a negative detail about her I am going to clean a part of the house instead. Negative energy turned to a positive outcome! Bonus is it reduces my stress so much when I have a cleaner home.
What are some other resolutions you guys have decided on?
Mine is to ask myself "does it fulfill me spiritually or mentally" before I do or get upset about anything.
Specifically I am going to stop checking Bm's Facebook page. It doesn't fulfill me to know what shes doing and I can actually rest assured whatever she is doing would either annoy me or worry me so what's the point in knowing the details?
Whenever I get the urge to check her Facebook or dwell on a negative detail about her I am going to clean a part of the house instead. Negative energy turned to a positive outcome! Bonus is it reduces my stress so much when I have a cleaner home.
What are some other resolutions you guys have decided on?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: BFR New Years Resolutions?
Glad to know I'm not the only one who does this! If it helps, I ended up blocking her on Facebook, not because we ever really interact on there, but then her page will not show up to search or on friends pages if you have any mutual etc.. It took away the temptation to look because I would actually have to go to my settings and unblock her. That extra step made me stop and think how pointless, unfulfilling, and negative checking was in the first place.
BF resolution is to try to pick my battles. DH was such a huge push over when it came to BM due to a lot of guilt from their previous relationship that it infuriated me to watch her walk all over him because she knew she could. Now that a CO is in place and she has been put in her place, I've got to learn to let things go a lot more. When she tries to change things in her favor, my initial gut reaction is anger and it does no good for me, or dh, or the situation as a whole. I have to remind myself she has had to give up a lot in the past year and a little compromise is good for all of us.
1. I'm going to stop caring about BM having no desire to see SS. It's her loss and SS seems unaffected. She blew off her visit today and it was my last straw.
2. I'm done with my own ex SF. He abused me, my mother, and my brother for my whole childhood. My mom has pushed me since their divorce to maintain a relationship with him. In July, he and his wife called to berate me for not listing him as my father on Facebook and it made me realize I'm an adult and don't have to listen to his insults anymore. I had planned on letting him meet DD but decided instead that I'm done. I blocked him and his wife on Facebook so they'd never pop up to tempt me.
BFP #1 11/07/2012 EDD 07/09/2013 M/C 11/22/2012
BFP #2 02/05/2013 EDD 09/19/2013 Arrived via c-section 09/27/2013
I am going to focus on making as many positive memories with SS as possible. I will try my hardest to foster his love of cooking and art.
I will also try to keep my frustrations and anger to a minimum, and try to remember that he's only three. It's hard not to be mad when he accidentally spills the cake batter everywhere, or drops an open marker on his clothes and the carpet. I hope to find a balance when it comes to discipline. I am also going to read the parenting books that I found helpful again.