Almost 16 months old and not sleeping... ever.

eelise11

My DD is a week shy of 16 months old. She has never, and I mean never, slept well at all. As a little baby, I would sit up with her 24/7 in tears just from her screaming and not sleeping. We found out she had GERD, had her medicated and it got a little better but not much. At about 14 months, she slept through the night once or twice but that's about it. When I put her to bed, she will stand up and scream and yell. She will continue to do it until I lay her back down and cover her up and the cycle repeats no less than 10-15 times before she will doze off. Then, she will sleep for about 2 hours and then all hell breaks loose. For instance, it's 2 a.m. and I have been fighting her since 7 p.m. to go to sleep. She won't nap anymore so I'm lucky to make it to 6-7 p.m. before she's such a mess all she does is scream and throw herself to the ground repeatedly. I honestly don't know how to handle this. I have followed all the recommendations of my pedi and went as far as trying melatonin, which doesn't work either. Please help me. Idk what to do anymore.

covertxxamour

I don't really have much advice, but I wanted to offer support. You sound so frustrated, and I understand. Just a few suggestions/questions.

Do you have a night light? Some kids are obviously afraid. Some hate it. So change that. If you have one, take it out. If you don't, get one. What about a sound machine? That has worked wonders for DD. She has listened to "rain" ever since she was born. What about a lovey? Does your child have a favorite toy or stuffed animal that can be taken into their bed? DD sleeps with her glowworm and Violet the dog every night.

How is your bedtime routine? Anything you might need to change? Ever since DD was born we do bath, pjs, cuddle with the lights off and TV on, then bed. Same time every night. It never worked for DD, but can you rock her to sleep? Also, do you give her anything before bed? I'm wondering if she's waking after 2 hours due to being hungry? Sometimes DD gets a little snack/Sippy before bath time.

I hope you find a solution very soon. Keep your head up.

M&M227

I would read Dr. Ferber's book and sleep train.  DD has bad reflux too and between sleep training and the correct medication she became an amazing sleeper at 9 months.  It's difficult to sleep train but I highly recommend reading the book and doing it.  LOs are smart and yours has figured it out and it will take some work for her to learn to sleep on her.  I personally think it's super important for babies to learn to fall asleep on their own and Dr. Ferber makes some great associations that helped me understand how she was feeling.

becasmeca

I bet you are exhausted. Hang in there--there is sleep to be had!

I feel like your DD is trying to tell you something by all of the crying. I see why pp recommended the ferber method; it does work and has worked for a lot of families! But essentially you have already reported doing a form of CIO if you put her in her crib--she cries--- you wait--- go in and check wash, rinse, and repeat still with zero sleep progress. Based off of that, I do not think a CIO method would be affective for your LO.  

If I were you I would try something completely different. Can she sleep with you? I feel like at this point you both need to do whatever it takes to get sleep! What is your bedtime routine? What is her environment like when put to bed? What is your energy like when putting her to bed?

I wish I had a definitive answer for you! What works for my son :

A consistent and predictable bedtime routine (bathies, jammies, books and cuddles, sometimes we will do lullaby songs with a read a long book, prayers, and na-nights) Daddy takes him to bed gives him the same baby blanket and tells him he is our world, and the world we love. Turns on his fan and night light and shuts the door.

A space heater that is programmed to keep the temp in his room 74 degrees

A fan for white noise

If he does cry-- we go to him! At this stage in the game I can differentiate between a serious I need you cry or... I am just trying to gain proximity cry! If it is a serious cry...that is when we go get him!

GL!

rboisvert

I'm so there with you.  My 19 month old has been sleeping in 1 hour chunks for weeks.  I don't have an answer but I just wanted you to know other people are living the same hell.  You have treated her for GERD but has your pedi looked for other health issues?  I work with children with behavioral issues and we always look at medical first that's really my only thought.  I hope things get better for you in the new year.

preggersin2011

I would suggest maybe it is the laying flat part? When I had GERD it was painful to lay flat and I had to prop myself up on pillows and such. After learning my triggers I manage it with diet now... I would suggest co sleeping in a chair for a night and see what happens. Since your child is old enough to stand and move about, an incline to one side of the bed might not be a good idea.

LO's room is kept at 70 like the rest of the house, too warm and they can't sleep well. A humidifier and a white noise machine too plus a night light. (Learned LO was afraid as a baby) until 4 months she slept exclusively in a swing.

ThatWasAHoot

The thing that really sucks about all of this is that at this point it is probably completely habitual on her end.  She probably couldn't soothe herself as an infant and it just continued from there.  That totally sucks.  I agree with sleep training.  Sleep training and routine.  I also second the sound machine.  And maybe a twilight turtle if you don't have a nightlight.  That thing is great.

sunshineincolor

I can't even begin to understand how exhausted and frustrated you must be! When my DD was about 6 months, she really started to get into a pattern of habitually waking, refusing naps, and just generally making herself and everyone miserable. Something that hasn't been mentioned yet and I think you might be open to as you've mentioned melatonin is supplements. We used Calms Forte 4 Kids by Hylands regularly to get my daughter out of her bad sleeping habits and on to a better routine. I believe it may say on the bottle to not use until 2, but it was deemed perfectly safe by 2 pediatricians and my naturopath. You may need to use a bit higher dosage as well as your daughter sounds similar to mine...stubborn! After a while Of using them regularly, we could cut back to only when she needed it after a rough day etc. I would say that after about a month my daughter STTN and went down pretty easy for naps. Another herbal supplement is Calm Restore by Gaia kids. Just another one to try...hope it gets better soon.

eelise11

I haven't been on in so long and I forgot I posts this. To give a little background we previously sleep trained, she has a night light and a sound machine, her blanket is her lovey. If she has anything else, she will throw it out of her crib. A big problem we have is that she still takes a binky but only for sleep. She will stand up in her crib and throw her binky out and then just stand there and scream. For instance, I've been trying to get her to nap for 2 hours. It's the same, throw binky, scream, stand n crib, go lay her down, give binky, cover her up. 3 minutes later repeat. I'm at my wits end and on the verge of taking the binky cold turkey and just letting her cry it out. I just don't know what to do Anymore. I've been trying to take her binky since she was 4 months. She absolutely will not sleep without it. 

Bblund

girl, I feel you. My 14 mth old is a litle monster at night. she has her good nights but its not easy. I have a fan in her room and have a night light. she doesnt like to have covers on so she slepts without them....and she sleeps on her stomach. Bottom line is.. try to change her bedroom, use a fan and/or light. I would rub lavendar oil on the bottoms of her feet and the back of her neck. It really soothes babies at night.

Big hugs to mama!