Late Term and Child Loss

New To Board Intro

Hello, I'm Michelle.  I am 17w3d.  We went for our "sex reveal" ultrasound yesterday and got the news that our baby has hydrops, and cystic hygroma, and will die in utero.  We are choosing to terminate this week.  I became pregnant naturally for this pregnancy, but last May got pregnant via IVF.  That pregnancy ended in miscarriage after five weeks.  Needless to say, this pregnancy was a big surprise.  I'm having the weirdest emotions.  One minute I literally feel fine, which is so weird, then I break down spontaneously.  I don't have to be thinking about anything at all, I just start to randomly cry.  My husband and I just both feel like these past two years of trying and failing has kicked our asses.  We've also experienced two deaths in the family, and my MIL is suffering from terminal cancer.  It all just feels like too much, but at the same time we feel so lucky to have each other.  We're very happily married and have a wonderful life besides all this "crap".  It's all just so surreal.  Just wanted to surround myself with people that have some idea of what we're going through.  

Re: New To Board Intro

  • *ticker warning*


    I am so sorry for what you are experiencing. We lost our first daughter at 31 weeks to unexplained stillbirth, but I know there are some women on this board who have experience with terminal diagnoses. I will be thinking of you and wishing you a safe and smooth delivery. I am sorry to welcome you to our group but I hope you can find some comfort and support here.

      Our Angel Patricia born sleeping 3/30/12 at 31 weeks
    Our Fighter Anna born early 1/8/13 at 26 weeks
    Hoping to bring home #3 due 9/9/15
  • So sorry you are here. I had a very similar experience to yours and lost my baby girl at 19 weeks the week of thanksgiving. I tried to pm you but my stupid phone won't let me click on your name. My heart is very heavy for you bc I know exactly how heartbroken you are right now. Please don't hesitate to pm me if you have any questions! Hugs.

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    8/12-Suprise BFP- Sweet Bunny Born Sleeping 11/21/12 (19 weeks)

    -5/7/13- MMC (8 Weeks)

    11/6/13- BO discovered at 7 weeks- natural MC 11/25/13

    8/14- Surpise IF dx...low AMH (.24)- moving on to IVF

    IVF #1- 11/14- 6R5M4F=2 perfect frosties

    12/19/14- FET of 2 embabies = BFP!!!  One Little Bean EDD: 9/3/15

    Everyone Welcome.

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  • I am so sorry that you have to be here, you must be in so much pain right now. I lost my son when he was full term, but I still know a lot of the feelings your feeling. I will be thinking of you and praying for you. 
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial ticker
    Due with baby boy # 2 in May 2016
    DD #1 born January 2014

  • I could have written this exact post.  We also went to our 20 week anatomy scan and discovered that our son had cystic hygroma.  After going to Children's Hospital to further investigate the diagnosis we were pretty much told he would die in utero.  We chose to terminate and we did this past week.  It sucks and it is crappy.  My best friend said something to me that I keep thinking about.  She said "You never get over a loss like this you just learn to live with it."  That's what I am trying to do.  Learning to live with it.  Hugs.
    BabyFruit Ticker

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers

  • I am so sorry for your loss. You seem very sure of your decision and I am glad. It is very easy to start second guessing which is awful. Just remember that you are choosing to suffer this pain so that your child will never have to feel pain. Feel free to pm me. I am on my phone so I can't send pm at the moment.
    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Daisypath Anniversary tickers


    ***Congratulations to my TTCAL buddy Roxyttandme!! It's a GIRL!! Charlotte arrived on 9/29!!!!***
    PGaL/PAL Always Welcome!!
  • Sending you lots of hugs. We also lost our daughter in September to a terminal diagnosis. I know that it can feel very isolating but please know that you aren't alone. Please feel free to private message me anytime. Thinking of you and please know that you have come to a very supportive and comforting place.
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