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October 2011 Moms
Nita2603
member
It's Friday! Confession time!
Nita2603
member
This discussion has been closed.
Re: It's Friday! Confession time!
I have an irrational fear of lurkers, that's why I didn't post my name yesterday. I don't care if you guys know, but what about the people that don't post and just lurk? Stupid, I know. I should get off my high horse, I'm really not that important. (you know what I mean)
ETA: Grammar: plural lurkers, not just one.
I totally get why people don't want to post their names, which is why I added that in the post. I don't think it's stupid to worry about lurkers! I feel like I should change my SN sometimes (but don't want to lose my points - now that is stupid.
)
Reading about the weed smoking yesterday made me realize that I'm a pretty straight-laced girl ... I didn't drink until my freshman year in college and I've never smoked a cigarrette, weed, or done any other drugs, ever.
Where's the weed post, I missed that.
I'm the opposite, I drank, smoked cigs & pot before my junior year of High School. However, I totally did a 180 and quit the cigs and pot before college.
Weed and pot are not the same thing? LOL .... wow I must be REALLY dense! I was referring to the pot smoking.
)
Yes, they are the same thing, I just wrote out pot instead of weed. Sorry, I'm operating on barely any sleep
Haha, that's OK! I do feel better though, now that you confirmed that weed and pot were the same thing. :oP Hope your weekend is relaxing and you get some good sleep!
Thanks! You're so cute, kujay
I always have this in the back of my head too.
On a similar note, my FFFC is that it has become clear that I have a really hard time trusting people and asking for help much to my detriment. I was going to the counseling center to deal with things with DH but it has ended up where I actually have some things that I need to work on. I end up taking on so much that I am exhausted and overwhelmed. It has been a struggle to let things go or delegate them to others because I am afraid that they won't do it, or won't do it right, or that I will end up having more work to do to fix it. The only people I trust to watch my kid is my Mom and DS's daycare providers. Since my Mom lives 3 hours away I don't have any external babysitting support outside of daycare. I finally asked a grad student if she would mind watching DS so we could get a few things done (at my house of course) after the new year.
ETA: Correction FFFC instead of UO...not enough coffee yet.
This is an AW/FFFC. My kid continues to prove that my instincts are right on and pediatricians give really bad advice when it comes to sleep/infant nutrition.
While some on this board, and my IRL friends have forced their kids to drop night feedings "because their pediatricians say they don't need it," I've been insistent that babies do need to eat at night and will drop the feedings on their own. Up until last Friday, LBB was waking once at night to eat. Now he doesn't wake at all. He's been consistently STTN for a week now without waking for a night feed. Which also proves that he wasn't just waking "out of habit" (which I think is one of the most BS things I've ever read on The Bump).
I wish I had focused more on studies, but I likes smoking weed a lot more than receiving my education. That being said, I had a lot of fun and do sometimes miss my pot aka weed smoking days. I would never want to be a pothead like I once was, but a joint here and there would be nice if legal.
I totally agree!! When P was waking at night for feedings I stuck with it, and now he sleeps like a champ with an occasional feeding here and there. I always follow HIS cue and works for us.
Mine: P is such an easy guy and always has been, and I fear our next one will be the complete opposite!
I think it could be a disaster and awkward if YH tries to give them something. Wtf are these people thinking having 2 kids back to back? Get a job, give up the gym membership and buy your kid some food. What a loser.
And kujay if it makes you feel better I'm very straight laced. I didn't have my first drink until 23 and I lived on campus next to the bars, I have never smoked and if someone showed me pot I wouldn't know what it is. I would probably guess oregano or something along those lines.
I haven't let my mom feel the new baby kick yet, even though I know she is dying to feel him. (She's a midwife so she gets extra excited and involved with the pregnancy.) I keep telling her "No, he's not kicking right now" or "it's not hard enough to feel outside yet." This makes me feel like a b!tch and maybe I am being one, but I want to keep him all to myself right now.
DD is incredibly attached to my mom. Sometimes she actually prefers her to me. My mom lives down the street from us, so naturally we see her often. Last weekend, DD cried when I picked her up and reached for my mom. My mom also constantly refers to DD as "my baby." It has always bugged me, but with my pregnancy hormones and emotions out of control, it p!sses me off and hurts when DD wants her instead of me (I cried about the incident last weekend - probably ridiculous, I know.) My mom also knows all of this bothers me, but doesn't get it. She says it's normal for babies to prefer Grannies sometimes...um, not at this age and not constantly!
Anyway, I realize my pregnant crazy self is probably making too much of all of this, but it's why I am keeping my little guys movements for myself and MH right now. I like that LO can't prefer my mom yet.
Sigh. I'm pathetic.
I took a break from all things internet for months and the first site I checked when I got back on this morning (first day off in awhile where I haven't had to set an alarm and be somewhere early too) - first thing I did was log on to TB. Didn't miss fb, or the rest of that stuff but sure have missed the oct.11 board. So many are KU! Congrats ladies! h&h pregnancies to each of you.
My confession? I've been in therapy consistently since April and have made more progress than I ever thought possible in my lifetime. But it has also confirmed what I've always thought. Everything really does start with my mother - very much like a cliche but I'm over that. She meant well but she f*cked up and her best wasn't good enough. I accept it. Still love her too - don't have to (and definitely don't) like her from day-to-day but I'm allowed that. I am truly happy for the first time in my life and to be able to say that sounds dramatic but it's also very true.
My other confession? This past year has been rough in many ways but mostly because I became a mother and had to confront the issues I've had with my own in order to break the cycle. I think I'm doing well.
I*heart*therapy.
Thank you.
I have another one! A month ago, I started a lifestyle detox to truly eat as healthy/organic as possible. Quit drinking coffee, soda, processed foods, blah blah blah. My body started to let go of toxins faster than it could get rid of them so I started to break out and that break out has led to the worst effing acne-detox healing crisis I've ever had! My face looks horrible, worse than when I was a teenager (and I had pretty bad acne back then). It's all over my jawline and down my neck. It's taken 4 weeks of being very, very careful with it (washing with coconut oil/baking soda) and it is finally (FINALLY) turning the corner and the pigmentation "scars" are starting to fade. This has been the most humbling 4 weeks of my life. I haven't worn make-up and have been drinking more water than I ever have, and I can tell the difference. The new skin coming through is flawless and I know I'll be so glad I went through this. Still doesn't take the sting out of it when I feel the need to explain to to complete strangers why I could star in my own proactiv commercial.
You aren't alone. I very rarely drink. Not because I have a problem with it, I just don't really enjoy it. Maybe that will change after number 2 gets here, haha!
My confession is kind of lame. I love feeling the baby move. Seriously, love it. But I really can't stand baby hiccups. There's just something weird and annoying about a constant thump so low. This baby seems to get hiccups quite often.
Before I met DH, I was head over heels for one of my brother's friends. We had some connection (emotional and physical) but he didn't see me as more than his friend's little sister. He met someone and I met DH, both of us are married, with a baby. We haven't really talked (espically texting) in a few years, I took him out of my phone. He texted me yesterday to say Happy Birthday. My confession, is that is was a nice surprise to see his text!
Don't get me wrong thou, I am completely happy with DH, but it was nice to see he remembered my birthday!
I'm so happy to be pregnant, but the anorexic in me is terrified of getting fat. I feel like everything I eat is just sticking to me and I feel horrible. And now I feel guilty for feeling that way...
We have seen the heartbeat twice and I am still terrified that something bad is going to happen. I never bled with my previous miscarriage, so we didn't know until we had the scan and there was nothing. The wait until my NT scan on the 2nd where I can see the heartbeat again is killing me.
I haven't gotten AF in 6 weeks. I have the Mirena, and I read after a year some women stop getting AF. The logical side of me says, I just stopped getting AF and that's a good thing.
But the freaked out side of me says what the F I'm pregnant?? I can't handle 3! I always wondered how some ladies can wait forever to test, but now I understand. I have no want to take a test. I'm 99% sure I'm not KUed, but there's this little part of me that worries. I mean you actually have to have sex to make a baby, so I'm pretty safe there. Haha!
I've been glad you believe this, because we haven't stopped E either.
OMG, Rox, your DS is soooo cute! I love red heads. I married one, in fact.
This is what I was thinking. Why do they both have gym memberships when they can't feed themselves. Sounds like their priorities are twisted. On the other hand I completely understand you wanting to help and I was in a similar situation this week. One of my FB friends is on disability (SSI) and moved recently to a different area to try to improve things for her kids. Now things are going to hell even worse and I feel bad for them. I mailed them a gift card recently to help but it isn't something I can keep doing and at some point she will have to figure it out.
I love Edison! I'm secretly sad that C doesn't have red hair like me. He's got my brown eyes but not my hair.
Nora has a tinge of red to her hair, but I think it will end up being brown like mine. She looks like her father in about every other aspect, so she may as well get her hair from me.
Nita (I assume you're on mobile) I changed my siggy pic.
And one for the heck of it and because I'm bored.
I think I've now posted to much on this board completely unrelated to confessions.
Sorry, you have to deal with me today. I'm for once actually bored at work. I'm going to go pin some things now.
Liz, I have never had a MC that I am aware of but I was terrified when I was pregnant with DS. I was on guard my entire pregnancy because I was terrified that something would go really bad. I had US every month while pregnant with DS and it was extremely stressful until I got the results back. I was always afraid that there wouldn't be a heartbeat or something else would show up. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that I can understand why you are still terrified. I am sure that baby is doing great and I will keep you in my T & Ps. Please keep us updated though and good luck with the NT on the 2nd!
I also love red hair! My mom had bright red hair white now, and I was always jealous that my brother got the red hair and mine is dirty blonde.
MIL also had red hair, so I was hoping we would have a ginger baby. Sophie was born with blonde hair and now it is reddish, but I think she might end up a brunette.
I kinda feel like an imposter when people comment on her red hair because E's hair and my brother's puts hers to shame.
Gator still wakes. If she does, I comfort her...if that doesn't work, I know she is hungry. I once asked on my FB about babies in cloth at night time, because Gator is a heavy night wetter and I have a lot of friends that also have their babies in cloth. One friends solution was to stop going her liquids after 6pm. Seriously?! Gator eats foods, but she is still hungry in the eve and the middle of the night on occasion. I'm not going to NOT give her something. I would hate to have someone inform me that I cannot have food or drink from 6pm until morning. I know it's not habit because its not like she wakes up every night, or at the same time. And I can usually pinpoint if she will wake up by how much she ate for dinner, so I know she is hungry.
I have a friend that acted like I was an idiot for doing night feedings and she dropped her daughters night feedings at 3 months because her Ped told her it was habit at that point. And for convienence, she didn want to have to get up at night. So instead, she listened to her daughter scream all night for a week until the baby gave up. She is now one and the most awful sleeper....constantly waking up and screaming and then her mom complains about it on FB. She is growing and hungry lady!!! Give her something to eat and she will go back to sleep!
We haven't gotten our tree yet.
Gator and I have been sleeping in until 11:30am every morning for the past few weeks.
I haven't done laundry in three weeks....needless to say, our laundry room is full and I have a lot of laundry to do the next few days.
Yesterday I had to have my third pap in under two years. I was stressed about it. It only took a few minutes. SO was home with Gator but had to go into the office at a certain time. I told him they were running behind and went and did some Christmas shopping by myself for over and hour before heading home.
Now that I have a baby, I dread the holidays. Don't get me wrong, I love doing holiday stuff with SO and Gator. But I am so sick of the guilt trips family members give us for not being with them 100 percent of the time. They want to see Gator. That's fine. But both sides plan a ton of crap and expect us to be there for everything. It's exhausting, and we give up doing what we want to do or spending time just the three of us, to make it to family stuff. Although I love that the family is all close, sometimes I wished we lived in a different state so our holidays could be more relaxing.