First Ever TTC Check In!

ball.and.chain

Frustrated? Overwhelmed? Excited? Bitter?  Spill it, ladies.  Where are you in your TTC journey and how are you feeling about it all?

Anyone who is in the PCP (Pre-Conception Planning) stage is welcome to join in.

QOTD: Would you consider yourself an optimist or a pessimist when it comes to TTC?

polyhymnia23

My wife and I are searching for the right donor, preparing me for pregnancy (trying to lose weight, get extra healthy) and trying to pay off debt. Once we do these things, we are going to be TTC and we are SO excited. We are surrounded by pregnant sisters right now (her sister, our sister-in-law and my brother's gf) and we are glad we waited until now to even consider it. Frankly, we want all of the attention and since this will be our first (and we are the ONLY kids without a kid!), we know it will be amazing. 

We are very optimistic! Based on my mother's history, plus the fact that my cycles have become normal (yay!). We are hoping for one try and preggo A girl can wish!  

Manada

We are off to the clinic this morning for our IUI! Yesterday we had a 20mm follicle and some nice CM so we're good to go! Fingers crossed for this cycle, things were optimal with regards to all the baseline tests so hopefully there is a good egg in there!

QOTW: I am mixed. I am optimistic underneath it all, but scared of being too optimistic so I try to be pessimistic so I prepare for the worst :. Haha go figure!

healz413

Like Manada said, we are doing IUI number one today! I'm so excited to try to knock her up even if technically all I'm doing for the actual insemination is holding her hand.

As far as QOTW, I'm finding it difficult to balance my optimistic nature with my feeling that I should try to keep both Manada and myself grounded in terms of percentage chances of success on each go.

trisholio

I can very much relate.  My wife and I spent over two years talking about having a family.  We tried to lose weight, that didn't go so great.....we quit smoking, which went great and as soon as we paid off debt there was more debt.  So we decided that it was just the right time for us.  It feels right and is just the right time.  We found an amazing donor and couldn't be more excited!

I wish you two the best of luck!!!  I think you are smart to wait for your own time to have a baby.  It will be more spotlight on your and your little bundle of joy ;-) 

mollykelley

healz413:

Like Manada said, we are doing IUI number one today! I'm so excited to try to knock her up even if technically all I'm doing for the actual insemination is holding her hand.

Healy- ask doc if you can insert the sperm! My wife does this and it makes it more exciting. Also, read about how to use those 15 minutes of "rest" when they leave you in the room with the timer. Seriously, I believe this helps!

B&C - how are you doing at this point? Any big plans for those frozen embryos?

As for me, we are in our 2ww and I'm not the optimistic one. Mostly because every time, I thought "this is it" except for the one time that I actually was pregnant, when I didn't feel like I was at all. The progesterone gives me sore boobs, excessive CM, and makes me tired. So I'm done googling early pregnancy signs and getting excited every time.

Otherwise, I do like to dream. And we talk about our future children whether they come next year or the year after that. I'm done obsessing about what I do "this cycle" that makes it happen. The truth is, everything I have done my whole life has prepared me for this.

I went back and read the FAQs on this board, many from 2010, and saw that many of the posters expressing my same struggles now have little ones (and many seem to have twins). So I'm keeping the faith. But it is hard. And frustrating. Thank you, B&C, for starting this. I'm sending you big hugs!  

laynesmomma

Sadly, I go in bouts of being hopeful to feeling it will never happen. Planning on trying again in April but in between regarding pessimism n optimism. It will be the 7 th iui... Only 2nd medicated.

Manada

mollykelley:

 Healy- ask doc if you can insert the sperm! My wife does this and it makes it more exciting. Also, read about how to use those 15 minutes of "rest" when they leave you in the room with the timer. Seriously, I believe this helps!

 IUI done ---  sadly, no room there for Healy to do the inserting, but it was very quick, and not painful at all so I'm incredibly grateful for that!

 

Our RE laid it on us though that she wants us to come back for CM tomorrow morning too just to make sure I ovulated today --- ARGH!  I could have done without that little sliver of doubt that she gave us about whether or not it was even timed right!  We only do one insemination/month, so we don't have another vial of sperm ready if they did do it too early today, so I'm just hoping that the beautiful 21mm follicle I have has ruptured late this morning or will early this afternoon!  

 

But the process was super easy, and our count was a whopping 15million (YAY!) so that's great!  Fingers crossed!

mollykelley

Sparkles, my phone won't let me quote last question but YES. It is standard to get the sperm count of specimen at IUI. This month my donor was 24 mil which is 6 times the average Joe on the street! That and being lined up with two beautiful mature follicles and I will be blown if this is a bfn. But then, I can't be too optimistic either!

thiswillbe

Wow, did the regular "PCP/TTC/ATP Wednesday" check-in kick the bucket? I guess I've been on here so infrequently, I didn't even realize it was gone!!

mollykelley

Why? Sparkles is cute! Haha. I've seen this question posted before and the answer is no. I'm thinking I should have a more anonymous name after I ranted about my boss... But apparently you need to start a whole new account and you would lose all your old posts. They would still be there but under your old name.

ball.and.chain

thiswillbe:

Wow, did the regular "PCP/TTC/ATP Wednesday" check-in kick the bucket? I guess I've been on here so infrequently, I didn't even realize it was gone!!

Hi TWB, there's a thread a little further down in which I asked whether people would prefer to do one all-inclusive check-in (PCP/TTC/ATP like we used to do) or do separate check-ins for separate situations.  This came up in the first place because T*T started doing a Pregnancy Check In AND I didn't think we had done PCP/TTC/ATP in a while (I checked and the last one anyone posted was from 11/21!) so I wondered if people still had any interest in it.  I feel like TTC is a stressful process and people going through it might want a place to vent/ask questions/share exciting progress. Or in my case, stew in my own bitter juices.   There are a lot of TTC newbies.

The vibe I got from that thread was that a) people didn't seem that attached to PCP/TTC/ATP and b) the TTC people seemed to like the idea of a TTC check-in. It's kind of in beta right now. But I don't really think we need separate check-ins AND an inclusive community check-in, so I'm not sure where this leaves us.

ball.and.chain

mollykelley:

Sparkles, my phone won't let me quote last question but YES. It is standard to get the sperm count of specimen at IUI.

Actually it depends on what kind of provider you are using.  An RE is equipped to do sperm analysis because they frequently deal with patients for whom this is their issue (male factor infertility).  A midwife or OB practice that is just doing inseminations but not treating infertility is probably not going to offer sperm analysis; they may not actually have the resources to do it. I did my first 4 IUIs at a low-intervention midwife practice, and sperm analysis was not an option.  They would look at the sperm under a microscope to make sure it was in good condition, but all you got as far as "analysis" was "they look like they're good swimmers" or "they look really active!"

My RE does sperm analysis on every vial used for IUI as a matter of course, but I know of others whose REs offer it as an option but charge extra for it and do not do it unless you ask or you are an MFI couple.

Sparkles, it may be worth asking but if you are seeing a MW, I wouldn't count on it.

mollykelley

Thank you bc for clarifying. I overlooked the mw factor.

And thanks for this thread. I think without it we would create so many separate TTC threads and this is better.

ball.and.chain

Technically I am on a TTC break; my RE won't do a transfer until after my 2nd period post m/c.  My D&E was last Thursday and I am still bleeding and cramping so it will be a while.  RE said it would probably take 4-6 weeks to get my 1st period, and my regular natural cycle is about 31 days, so I think the earliest I could transfer would be late February but it is more likely to be early-mid March, later if the m/c totally flucks with my cycle.

Emotionally, things are still pretty raw. I will have an OK day and then the next day I will just fall apart. I was fine, if grumpy, at work today, but burst into tears when I got a holiday card from an old friend (who knows nothing of my pregnancy or m/c) at home.

My wife is a rock star.

Time is moving very slowly but we're getting our ducks in a row and trying to be patient. I have a follow up appointment with the OBGYN who did my D&E in mid-January and an FET consult with my RE the following week.  The embies are waiting in the lab.  When my body is ready, we'll be ready.

And I am a MAJOR pessimist. From the beginning I was worried this wouldn't work, despite having no discernable problems with my fertility. My lack of success has only fueled the pessimism. Even though I know I'm lucky to have 5 embies ready to go, I keep thinking of all the things that could go wrong with them. Fortunately I am married to an optimist, who keeps me from completely going off the rails.

mollykelley

Thanks bc, for checking in. It's important to share the difficult parts too, and your sharing really touches me. I was in a fog after my mc and I took a while to get back on track both in body and mind. I hope you will have some relaxing time with your family. Grieving is really difficult, especially when you feel the need to be private about it.

Like you, I am lucky to be married to an optimist!

PrincessLeash

Hi everyone! DW and I are on our second try. Should be happening around New Years. I will be the one carrying and I'm on 2.5mg of Femera day 3-8 and then I trigger when I'm told to. Last month was our first try and we thought we'd be blessed with a one hit wonder. Sadly we got a BFN. I was pretty upset and DW was really torn up which I was a little surprised about. I was a bit confused about the timing as they had be trigger and come in the next day. They said that based on my levels that was the best timing. So we have put our trust in them and pray that they get us that BFP that we've been dreaming of. 

I wish everyone lots of baby dust!!!

AmyRehs

I am so glad this post is here! My wife and I will be doing our 1st IUI at the end of January! We are so excited and nervous and scared! Our OB said all we need to do is come to the office and that is it. I am wondering if any of you did anything in particular during the month leading up to your IUI? We are so lost in this process and your help is welcome!