lots of anxiety

abj22

DH's company is sending us on a 6-day all-expense paid trip to Nevis (tiny island in the Caribbean) I looked online at the resort we are staying at -- it is AMAZING and it's something like $1000 per night!! Certainly not something DH and I would EVER do on our own, especially not in this economy. It is an opportunity of a lifetime.

But I don't know how I will leave DD for that long. The trip is in February. She will be 4 1/2 months old. The plan is for her to stay with MIL and FIL who are wonderful and are beyond excited about having her. I know she will be in good hands but I just don't know if I can do it. I left her with DH for 3 hours the other night when I had my book club and an hour this morning when I went to the gym and both times I couldn't wait to get home to her. It's not like I was worried about her. I just MISSED her.

Our flights are already booked so we are definitely going. I keep trying to ask DH about bringing her with us. I know it isn't what he wants to do. And I know it would be really good for us to get away and have "couple" time. I also know MIL will be CRUSHED if we decide to bring DD with us. Her mother just passed away so it's definitely not something we can bring up with her now.

I just don't know what to do. I'm sorry for venting and complaining about a wonderful vacation. I am just so anxious about this and it's 3 months away. The anxiety is starting to seep into other parts of my life. Maybe I just need some reassurance that I will be ok with it all and that it really will be good for us.?

847Christine

I don't blame you, I'd be torn too.  In fact, I'm OK w/my MIL, but I don't think I could leave DD w/her for more than a few hours even a year from now.  I think the only person I would really be somewhat comfortable with would be my mom & even then, I'm not sure how much I'd enjoy my trip w/o her.

SuzP

It's tough to do thats for sure.  We didn't leave DS until he was a year and half and that was only to attend FIL's funeral in Philly and we were gone just about as long.  We haven't left Evie Mae yet at all. 

That being said, you've got a great opportunity and it sounds like it would be a lot of fun. I can totally understand how torn you are though.  Best of luck with whatever you decide. 

mlf625

Oh man, that would be tough for me, too.  YES- of course she will be in great care with your ILs, and she's so young that as long as she is fed and loved, it won't matter to her.  But that said, I know if it were me I'd take DS with.  I know I wouldn't enjoy myself missing him- I'd enjoy the trip more if he were there with us even if it would limit us somewhat in activities.  We are going to CA to stay with my parents over New Years and had thought about taking an overnight trip to a resort on our own and leaving him with my parents...but I just don't want to leave DS yet, and I'm not going to force it. 

I think you need to do what YOU are comfortable with- not what your ILs want.  I mean, unless your DH is just 100% against it- obviously his feelings matter too.  But I know even if it wasn't what my DH wanted, if he knew that it meant a lot to me not to have to leave DS, he'd be happier knowing I would be happier!  Good luck making your decision.  Don't let it stress you out too much, because either way you and your DD will be just fine!  Sounds like a fabulous trip!!

mrparsley07

I agree with PP, you have to do what you are comfortable with. I'm sure she will be in very capable hands with you IL's. It sounds like they love her very much and you are comfortable with them.  The vacation sounds wonderful, but you don't want to spend such a wonderful vacation, stressing. The point is to relax   I'm not sure I'd be able to leave DD for that long. Maybe wait a while longer to make the decision.  Good luck and try not to stress over it too much.