It's finally here. One year ago at 8:56 in the morning I delivered our sweet, beautiful baby boy. For the last twelve months not a day has gone by that I didn't think of my son with love. When I think back to where we were a year ago, physically and emotionally, it's hard for me to believe how far we've come. It's true that as time passes the days get easier to handle. I cry less often and laugh a lot more. My memories of baby Gary are more often happy ones than they are traumatic ones. Still, I don't think that the pain of losing a child ever completely disappears. Rather it turns into different kinds of pain. Now that we're expecting again, amidst the joy and hope of having this new baby, I can't help but think how sad it is that they will never meet their brother. Or how difficult it will be to deliver at the same hospital where I delivered baby Gary.
So happy birthday, little man! Mommy and Daddy love you and miss you every day! You are our beautiful angel in heaven. What a beautiful gift we were given when you came into our lives, even if we feel that time was far too short. Hugs and kisses forever and ever!