2WW Check-in 12/12

nawlinsgrl

In a strange twist of events, I couldn't sleep in this morning (wonder why), but more shocking, DD is.  So, I get to put up this post before I head out for the day after all.

I had a couple more updates last night, which are posted on yesterday's check-in for those who are interested.  In a nutshell, the blood turned red last night.  I checked again on a FRER before bed and it showed up quicker (2-3 min) and darker than in the morning.

This morning I used one of my crappy ICs and got nothing, so of course I broke out the FRER after that.  Even though I will have my answer in a few hours, I need to know what my chances are now.

So, the line showed up in the first minute, and got slightly darker, but is still on the very light side.  After about 10 minutes it was better, but for at least the first 5 min, it was VERY light.

So, basically I have no idea what's going on right now.  I'm terrified it is a CP, but hopeful that is something more along the lines of SCH or vanishing twin (not sure if blood would be related to the latter, but throwing it out there as an option).  I'll take pretty much any option that has me pregnant and my baby out of harm's way.

I'll do my best to post an update as early as possible, but today is my friend's dad's funeral and after I go to the lab, I'm doing errands to prep for the gathering after the funeral, going to visitation, then back to the house to set up and then be with everyone.

Thanks to everyone for your support during this cycle, especially in the past 24 hours.  I will take as many T&Ps as I can get this morning, until the verdict is in.

I sincerely hope for some great news from my fellow cycle buddies in my absence.

Mrs. Erin

I'm offically out.  Got my beta back yesterday...... 3.  Turns out it was chemical.  I feel so broken.  Going to try and just enjoy the holidays and decide after that if we want to try another round.  But honestly, I don't think we can afford it.  And the emotional side is taking a toll on me.

I think I will just enjoy my husband and daughter and all the things I do have in my life right now.  I wish you all the best!

kimberm0511

Sharing good news on here isn't very fun when I am reading such bad news for others. 

 I did get another BFP on a FRER this morning.  I think it was a tiny bit darker.  I also got a BFP on a digital. 

 I'm not going to lie...with all of the bad news I am hearing I can't help but be terrified that mine will take a turn for the worst.  It's been approximately 18 cycles of TTC for me and I am excited, but am so nervous...it just seems surreal.  This will be DH's first child, so he is seems so positive and seems way happier than me.  Don't get me wrong...I am very happy...just scared.

Erin, I am so sorry about your CP.  I hope that you can enjoy the holidays with your family and not let IF ruin this time for you. 

Nawlins, I really hope that you are not experiencing a CP.  I know you have a busy and difficult day ahead of you with the funeral, but I can't wait to hear your results from the beta. 

nawlinsgrl

Erin, my heart is breaking for you. I am so sorry about your CP.

Kimber, glad to hear you are still getting positives. FX for a good beta this week.

Like Kimber said, it's bittersweet to announce, but I did get a good beta. It was 119.

People are starting to gather at the house, so I need to run. I will check in later.

erinms

I love seeing the good betas!  Congratulations to those finding success.

I probably don't have adequate words for those moms not having the same success today, so I'll just say that I am sending lots of love and positive thoughts to you today.  I know I am a rare poster here, and that we've never actually met, but this sh*tty journey makes me feel connected to all of us on it together.  It should not be this hard.   

kimberm0511

nawlinsgrl:

Erin, my heart is breaking for you. I am so sorry about your CP.

Kimber, glad to hear you are still getting positives. FX for a good beta this week.

Like Kimber said, it's bittersweet to announce, but I did get a good beta. It was 119.

People are starting to gather at the house, so I need to run. I will check in later.

Congrats on the good beta! Can't wait for mine. Did they seem concerned about the bleeding?

jeannaqueena

Oh Erin. I am so sorry. I am sure this is much harder than a bfn would have been. I hope you find comfort in your daughter during this unfortunate time. Many hugs

jeannaqueena

Kimber, huge congrats and just remember the old saying someone's else's unfortunes do not dictate your own. Please enjoy each day for what it is!! Be thankful and goodness someone from our fab 4 needs to succeed or else why would we all be trying to do IVF if it didnt work for some!!

Sorry for all my late updates. i realized i have one week to finish xmas shopping ans pull together DS's xmas gifts. So this morning I headed to the local tanger outlets with a friend plus I didn't want to be alone all day.

My update: more of the same. I wanted to wait till the pee stick dried before giving my post. The pee stick dried and very convincing negative. Yesterday was a bad day. I cried about 3 times...sob fest crying. Today not a year. I think I have realized this is the end. I wish my beta was today so I could stop the vag pills or I wish AF would just show full blown! Nawlins we are in opposite boats completely. I am so nervous for you and will be checking for your update. I hope the funeral is memorable of your friends father and gives the family some closure.

Thinking of you all!

jeannaqueena

Nawlinsamazing beta!!! Congrats!!

I want an update this evening on the bleeding. You are going Friday for beta 2 right?

nawlinsgrl

Just got home, and totally exhausted, since I've been up and at 'em since 5:30 this morning, but wanted to give a little more update.

The nurse said she wasn't concerned about the bleeding and thinks it is more than likely a SCH.  Initially she said the RE would do an u/s on Friday after beta, just to check that out, not to look at the baby, because it would be to early to see anything.

Then she called back a little later and said the RE feel really good about things based on my beta number, so we'll just re-do beta Friday and go from there.  So, the fact that they aren't too concerned, along with such a high number, is comforting.  I was terrified it would be low, but positive, and I'd be in beta hell.

When I told DH the number and that it was twice as high as last time (55 for 1st beta for DD), he asked if that meant it's twins.  I told him it's possible, but not necessarily the case.

Jeanna, so sorry things haven't changed for you.  I was really hoping you'd get some belated good news.  IF is so unfair, and you've done and been through so much.  Thank you for all your kind words and support during this cycle.  I wish I could help make the next two days go by faster, so you can move on from this cycle. 

girlieface3

Hi My girls,

Just got home from a busy day at school. I am so happy for Kimber and Nawlins! Congrats to you both!!

Erin and Jeanna, I am so sorry! I will continue to keep all of you in my prayers. I wish I had some words of wisdom, but I am at a loss. Its so unfair.

Had another bfn this am, but it was fmu so I don't know if it really counts, but that was followed up by AF cramps, which are identical to what I get every month, along with my crankyness. Doing my best to stay positive. 

 

jeannaqueena

Well I have joined the ranks of spotting. No way there will be a miracle now. I am really just glad to be out of limbo, but I can't help but think that 2 more babies died in my belly. My twins were born jan 9th so this time of year is already hard.

nawlinsgrl

I'm so sorry for both you ladies.  Girlie, FWIW, my strongest result of the three I took (morning, night, following morning) was my night test.  Not sure if that will affect your outcome, but couldn't hurt to try.

Jeanna, I feel so sad you are going through this, especially the connection it has to your previous loss.  You are such a strong woman to do all this hard work.  I know the day will come when you hold another of your babies in your arms.

Quick question to those of you still waiting on beta this Friday.  What would you like to do about continuing the daily check-in for the next two days?  I am more than happy to continue, but don't want anyone to feel like it's pouring salt on their wounds.

Would you prefer to update on your terms (which you can certainly do regardless of the check-in), or would you continue to find this particular thread helpful?  Just let me know, so I know what to do.

jeannaqueena

nawlinsgrl:

I'm so sorry for both you ladies.  Girlie, FWIW, my strongest result of the three I took (morning, night, following morning) was my night test.  Not sure if that will affect your outcome, but couldn't hurt to try.

Jeanna, I feel so sad you are going through this, especially the connection it has to your previous loss.  You are such a strong woman to do all this hard work.  I know the day will come when you hold another of your babies in your arms.

Quick question to those of you still waiting on beta this Friday.  What would you like to do about continuing the daily check-in for the next two days?  I am more than happy to continue, but don't want anyone to feel like it's pouring salt on their wounds.

Would you prefer to update on your terms (which you can certainly do regardless of the check-in), or would you continue to find this particular thread helpful?  Just let me know, so I know what to do.

My RE is making me do the beta tomorrow (Friday). I don't mind our check in b/c it makes it easy to follow all of us.