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Baby on the brain and DH is SOOO Nervous

CTbbPCTbbP member
in Babies on the Brain

I have two wonderful little boys who are 8 and 5 from my first marriage and my wonderful DH and I have been married for a little over a year and a half now.  We have been talking about TTC and I am so excited.  I would love to add a new bundle of joy to our family.  However, my sweet DH is so very very nervous.  He wants a baby but he is actually, I think, TERRIFIED of actually doing the deed and thinking this may really happen.  He wants it to happen but is just scared. This will be his first so he has all of the natural first time parent anxieties.  I wish there was a way I could calm his fears some and encourage him. Did any of you have the same issues?

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Re: Baby on the brain and DH is SOOO Nervous

  • bugandbibsbugandbibs member
    Babies (and parenthood) is scary. If you aren't scared at times you are doing something wrong. Good luck!
    Baby boy H is here! Born 2/1/2014 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Mysterious_wife: "And for the love of all things that sparkle, remove your last name" on BOTB.
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  • KenziKKenziK member

    My DH has the same feelings. I think one of the reason's he is wanting to wait is because he is afraid he won't be able to provide for us and be a good father. I think that most men feel the same way, they want to have children but are worried they will let their family down. I really love several articles on this page, maybe you could have your H read them?

     https://www.babycenter.com/expectant-dads

    image
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  • CTbbPCTbbP member

    Thanks Kenzik,

    I know those are his exact fears and he has lived alone previous to us getting married so I think he is afraid of all of the change.  We have a wonderful family dynamic and we are both very excited about the possiblity of us having a baby together but right now his other fears are out weighing these. I will definitely look at the expectant dads articles.

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  • GTown08GTown08 member

    My husband had the same problem.  I've been getting more and more excited about the possiblity of starting to try and have a baby, and my hubby seemed less than thrilled everytime I brought it up or threw possible baby names at him (yes, I know, not pregnant, baby names might be jumping the gun, but I get bored at work).  We'd always talked about and agreed we wanted kids before we got married, so I was a bit confused.  So I finally sat him down and said, "we need to have a real heart-to-heart about whether you still want kids and when we want to start trying." 

    Turns out, he's scared to start trying, because he's worried he won't be able to provide for us or he'll "screw something up."  I tried to be as honest with him as I could, let him know we were in this together and it wasn't all about him, and also pointed him to the Dads-to-be page on TheBump.  Not sure if it helped, as we haven't started trying yet, but he seems much calmer about the prospect, and now I think it is just timing. 

    http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tickerticker.aspx?&TT=bdy&TT1=bdy&CL=&CT=&CG=F&O=m_bird2&T=t_b11&D=20131129&M1=&D1=&T2=&T1=Teddy&T3=&CC=0&CO=&CO2=&W=&TS=&R=A&SC=green
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  • reason00reason00 member
    I'm still scared.
    BabyFruit Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker imageimageimageimage
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