Not liking some of the nurses

DawnJM25

DS was born 6 days ago at 32 weeks 4 days.  When DH and I go to the NICU during the day we have liked all of the nurses, except one.  She let us change the diaper and take the temperature, but other than that she didn't interact with DS or touch him AT ALL for the 5 hours we were there.  Granted, he was off food that day to let his bowels have a break, so he didn't need to be fed.  I understand that they want to make the parents feel involved while they are visiting, but as a parent I would still like to see the nurse interact with my baby.   

I have a childhood connection with the NICU social worker and she told me to let her know if there are nurses that we click with and vice versa because that's pretty typical.  I'm considering requesting not to have this nurse anymore.  Am I overreacting?

downwardsunshine

The  nurses never really interacted with DS because we were there all the time. I wouldn't even have wanted them too. We had one nurse though who wanted to hold him and feed him, and asked me if I was ever going to leave so she could. I fed DS every feeding but one while he was in the NICU. They interacted plenty with the babies who didn't have parents present. She is probably not wanting to interfere with your time with your LO. 

rjade9

I agree with pp, the nurse probably didn't want to interfere with your time with your LO. The nurses at our nicu don't bother him while we're there unless and alarm goes off, it's feeding time, assessment time, or he needs to be boosted up because he's a wiggle worm.

rslhmg

I agree that the nurse was trying to give you space to be with Lo, but I would add if her not interacting with him with you there made you uncomfortable next time she's there say something, I'm bumping on my phone so I can't see if this is your first, but you can easily use being nervous about all the wires and such as a reason for wanting her to interact too. If she still doesn't interact or you feel uncomfortable with her at all don't feel bad for asking for her not to be on your los team. I had one of dds nurses tell me that they aren't just there for the babies, they are there for the parents because when the parents are comfortable with the care their baby is getting, the baby feels it and does better.

Brummy14

I also like some of the nurses more than others, but at the end of the day, I really only worry if it looks like their care of the girls is subpar, and that's never been the case. Also, some nurses really believe VERY strongly in cluster care where they'll only touch/interact with the baby during changings, feedings, or vitals checks, and they'll do all of these at the same time, operating on the belief that strictly maximizing quiet periods of sleep for the babies helps with healing and growth. I have some nurses who really won't let me take the girls out to kangaroo unless it occurs during one of these times. Again, a minor thing but it could have to do with their philosophy on preemie care.

EAMommy

My LO was born 12 days ago and I had the same issue with one of the nurses last week. At first, I didn't care for her because I realized she wasn't interacting with any of her babies (I understood that she wasn't interacting with my LO because I was there). The next day I had her again, and there were several areas that I realized she wasn't doing her job. I spoke with the nursing manager and they have noted that I do not want her assigned to my LO again.

I've loved all the other nurses and, honestly, I think LO gets more attention when I'm not there because they've all gotten to know me and bond with my LO through me... They were even fighting over him during nurse assignments last night! 

I hope you LO gets the care you desire... Don't be afraid to speak up!

meldoo2002

I didn't realize it was common at the time to ask for certain nurses or not for certain nurses until I came here.  I don't think I would have thought of that unless I really had a major issue with them.

 That being said if he didn't need to be fed, I'm not sure what else you'd expect.  Other than feeding time our nurses didn't really interact with the babies.   That's when they did all their care... changing, feeding, temp, etc.  And if we were there, there was even less for the nurse to do... I often was able to deal with alarms by the time we were leaving.  I think that's pretty normal, but maybe it was more just a "feel" you got from her that made you uncomfortable.