A little advice...

savannat421

Hello! I just posted on something here for the first time, so I thought I would ask a question or two. Especially since you all are probably WAY more versed in natural childbirth methods than I am at the moment.

I plan on having an epidural, but I want to be prepared for everything, just in case. I know a lot of women want them but they don't take or they can't get one in time. It makes me very nervous, especially as a FTM! Do you ladies have any tips for methods or such that I could look up or practice to prepare for something like this? I wish I had thought to ask about it during my childbirth classes, but I didn't. Just want to be prepared for all scenarios (if that's even possible...).

Sometimes hearing it from others is better than just good 'ol Google. haha. Thanks!

SeaConquest

If you haven't read Ina May Gaskin's Guide to Childbirth, I would definitely recommend that. Even if you plan on an epi, I think that the more you know about childbirth -- ie that it is a natural process, that our bodies were made to do it, how it generally unfolds, other people's experiences (especially outside of the highly medicalized context) -- the more relaxed you will be and the easier labor will be for you.

I also recommend downloading relaxing music or pregnancy hypnosis to help put your mind in a very calm state. Best wishes and easy labor vibes!

 

savannat421

SeaConquest:

If you haven't read Ina May Gaskin's Guide to Childbirth, I would definitely recommend that. Even if you plan on an epi, I think that the more you know about childbirth -- ie that it is a natural process, that our bodies were made to do it, how it generally unfolds, other people's experiences (especially outside of the highly medicalized context) -- the more relaxed you will be and the easier labor will be for you.

I also recommend downloading relaxing music or pregnancy hypnosis to help put your mind in a very calm state. Best wishes and easy labor vibes!

 

I've heard of her! From Business of Being Born, I think. I'll have to look her book up. It's been hard to find books that aren't too "pushy" on any certain method. I just want something honest and straightforward, so that sounds pretty good. 

And we are considering music as well, since I am always more comfortable that way. Just finding something good has been a challenge. Thanks! 

oliversmommy32912

I didn't make it in time for an epidural (and am very thankful I didn't!). Honestly if you're going that fast there is nothing you can do to prepare yourself. You're just along for the ride. Thankfully your body knows what to do. I know that may sound scary to someone who is planning a medicated birth but it really isn't that bad. If you don't make it in time for the epidural it means you're almost to the end so it's over in a short time anyway. Good luck with everything!

AmyRI

The best advice I got was to listen to your body. If you aren't comfortable laying down, stand up. If that doesn't work, kneel. If that doesn't work... you get the idea. Just move around as your body tells you you should. And do your best to remain calm. Your body will birth your baby, the pain is temporary (and has breaks between contractions!), and if things are moving so fast that you don't have time to get the epi, then you're almost done.

And you forget all about the pain with time. Even right after delivery, I told DH that it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.

AshasaurusRex

Practice relaxation techniques, really prepare mentally of the possibility that you may have to go through more pain than you expected, and consider getting a doula. A friend of mine is a doula and was just talking yesterday about a mom she just attended, she said that her epi didn't take at all until she was pushing, so she basically didn't have any pain relief her entire labor. She wasn't prepared for labor without pain relief and it was a very good thing she had a doula there to keep her focused and help her relax through contractions.

angelacez

I do agree with your body knows what it's doing and to listen to it.  BUT I like to know what's happening in my body and why.  Which is why I like to read up on everything.  I think it helps to know so you don't feel like you're out of control or scared.  Ina May is wonderful!  I seriously love her.  A thinking woman's guide to birth is great too.  Check your library.  Most have a natural section that will have these or similar type books or you can request them. 

KateLouise

I think it can be easy to start to panic as the pain gets more intense. I would imagine if you plan an epi but are unable to get one for whatever reason then the panic could be greater because you're emotionally relying on the epi to get you through it. so relaxation techniques would be good.

I agree with pp about finding books with positive birth stories. You're right a lot of them are biased, but there are some good reads out there.

Also the more you know about the whole process then the easier it is to  think, "ok this is where I am ..." and go with it.

good luck 

georgi611

I had wanted an epidural from day 1, but progressed so quickly that it was pretty much pointless.  I made the decision to go med-free, and it was the best decision of my life.  When we have another child, I will choose med-free from the beginning, and utilize more techniques to deal with natural birth, such as a birthing ball and going in a tub/hot shower. 

Like Katelouise said...the panic was a little greater for me, because I had wanted that epidural from the beginning, but thank goodness for my husband and midwife...I got through it, and it was awesome.

Like you said...anything can happen.  You can walk in there wanting to do this this and this, and in a second, it can all change and you are doing something totally different.

Good luck, and sorry that I'm not much help.

HK2mom4

First I do hope this helps!

A secret I learned is that in most cases - one blinks an eye, fear sets in, the unknown, tension, tenseness, anxiety all play a hand in how much pain is associated with child birth. If however on the other hand you're confident, relaxed, letting your body do what it's designed for in the first place then that brief few moments of pain are eliminated very quickly after LO arrives. This is but a moment in time. As you see - fear, anxiety, and tension are your enemies not your friend! Being informed on all possible scenarios' gives you the power to control pain! I agree with others that good books such as mentioned do exist so do all the research you can - wisdom is being informed, knowledge is power.

As an offering might I supply you with this one: https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/69913625.aspx it can't hurt!