What are your thoughts on elective c-sections? Anyone with experience?

jschwerr0016

I am not sure what the main thought on this is - I very badly want to request a c-section, and while I know surgery is a big deal, I've had a lot of elective surgery and they are all very successful.  Also, my mom and husbands mom have had c-sections, as well as THEIR moms - I was 9 lbs, husband was 10 lbs at birth, and I literally have an abnormal fear of vaginal labor,

 Any thoughts/experiences with this?

giraffe54

C-sections can have easy recoveries, like mine. However... 

*Trigger below* 

I was talking to someone the other day who had a c-section a couple weeks before me at the same hospital and she almost died. They grabbed the baby, full of blood, and showed it to her in a frantic rush (they usually clean LO up first and do it calmly), then she passed out while her husband was sobbing and the doctors shouting they were losing her. No warning signs, no pre-existing risks. Luckily, she survived.

*End trigger*

In other words, surgeries have huge risks even if they are usually successful. Chances are you will be fine, but maybe not. Having the choice between holding my baby right away or having those first few moments take away from me while I sit in recovery is a no-brainer. I would give anything to have had those first few moments with my LO. I'm still depressed over it.

I understand your fear of tearing, I had it too. But, a small 1 inch tear in your lady bits versus a giant hole in your body near your vital organs? Your body will be cut open! It still hurts 6 months later. You can die from surgery. Your bladder can be punctured. LO can be hurt by it, and misses out on some of the benefits of labor (healthy bacteria, fluid squeezed out of lungs, etc.)

I suggest attending a hypnobirthing course. I'm not saying go unmedicated, but I think the calming techniques might help you.

GL. 

mamastich

I  have planned on the pefect natural delivery and ended up with a section but if i were to do it over again id have a section in a heartbeat. yea its surgery but i was up and moving in a few days and my vag is in tact.  done and done. My LO was  well over 9lbs and if you have some help at home go for it.  

RebeccaMichael

Agreed...I was in labor 18 hrs, pushed 2 hrs, went in for a section, glad because he was over 9 lbs. and as PP said, my vag is sill intact, will do a repeat and it's done. I was up and walking in no time. I'll miss the anticipation, but a nice scheduled day, just seems like the way to go. Good luck in your decision!

mben1119

I would never ever choose to have a c-section again. My recovery was terrible. And, flame me for it, but if you have such an "abnormal fear of vaginal labor" why get pregnant?  Any doctor who allows a woman with no medical reason to opt for a c-section is negligent, IMO.

ETA: It is perfectly possible to push out a 9 or 10 lb baby with little to no tearing. The size of the baby isn't indicative of the type of labor you'll have. I know plenty of women who have had 2nd and 3rd degree tears with 7 pound babies because of the baby's position, speed of their labor, etc.

nosoup4u

Have you heard of "Birthing From Within"? It's a book that gets into fears about labor and birth (which are totally normal, btw). There are also trained birth educators who teach classes connected to the book. It might be worth checking out to see if it helps you feel better about birth. 

Vaginal birth is a less-risky option than c/s, like a PP said. How many kids would you like to have? The more c/s you have, the riskier they become, while the same isn't true about vaginal birth.

I personally wouldn't choose a c/s, but I also had an unplanned one with my first. Physically, it was a fairly easy recovery, but it was emotionally hard to deal with (though there were other factors after his birth that were pretty stressful that contributed to my feelings towards the c/s). 

And FWIW, my VBAC baby was 10.5 lbs and just under 24". I had a second degree tear with him, but the recovery was still quicker than my c/s recovery. 

 

RayRay007

If you have a fear of vaginal birth, I'd say learn more about it. Most people (who are scared of birth) can't fathom how a baby fits through a vagina and figure they will be totally wrecked by giving birth. Learn more about what your body does and is capable of and you might be empowered rather than scared. The female body was designed to grow babies and give birth.

Also, c/s suck, even if you have a good one. Your abs will never quite be the same again. What kind of surgeries have you had in the past? Have they cut through muscle and fascia and put major organs at risk?   

ewilliams1127

mabenner1:

I would never ever choose to have a c-section again. My recovery was terrible. And, flame me for it, but if you have such an "abnormal fear of vaginal labor" why get pregnant?  Any doctor who allows a woman with no medical reason to opt for a c-section is negligent, IMO.

ETA: It is perfectly possible to push out a 9 or 10 lb baby with little to no tearing. The size of the baby isn't indicative of the type of labor you'll have. I know plenty of women who have had 2nd and 3rd degree tears with 7 pound babies because of the baby's position, speed of their labor, etc.

Nicely said.  No, I would never choose a CS if it was not medically necessary. Recovery is not a breeze, you have to have someone with you to help you do everything and I don't care what people say it hurts to have an incision.  My incision still bothers me to this day and my CS was 13 months ago. 

jschwerr0016

It's pretty rude to say this is immature - I'm merely looking for opinions and doing research before making any decisions - which most would say IS being mature.

And let's please not be ridiculous with saying - don't have children.  What a dramatic response. Yes - let me give up one of my biggest dreams because I have doubts and fears about delivery.  I would say that's extremely normal for anyone who hasn't gone through it, and it's just ignorant to say too bad - don't raise children for the next 30 years.

Thank you to all who offered helpful comments and personal experience.

giraffe54

jschwerr0016:

It's pretty rude to say this is immature - I'm merely looking for opinions and doing research before making any decisions - which most would say IS being mature.

And let's please not be ridiculous with saying - don't have children.  What a dramatic response. Yes - let me give up one of my biggest dreams because I have doubts and fears about delivery.  I would say that's extremely normal for anyone who hasn't gone through it, and it's just ignorant to say too bad - don't raise children for the next 30 years.

Thank you to all who offered helpful comments and personal experience.

Doubts and fears are normal. We all have them. Willingly risking your life (albeit a small but not non-existant risk) because of these fears strikes many of us BTDT mamas as immature because it is based on a knee-jerk reaction, not a careful look at facts, risks, what's best for mama and baby, etc. 

C-sections aren't the end of the world and I usually come on this board to reassure others of this, but they really shouldn't be elective if there are no contra-indications to vag births (NB, I'm not judging those who chose RCS over VBAC or C/S because of size, breech, other health concerns). Again, all I can say is a small tear in your lady bits or having your stomach flayed open... Normal fears and doubts aside, one is clearly scarier than the other.

FYI, even though my lady bits are totally intact since I didn't go into labour at all, I still have incontinence issues and sex was painful for a very long time. C-sections don't guarantee anything in that regard. 

Leap08

My first daughter was a c-section. The surgery was awful. I had an epi and it started to wear off, so I felt way too much. I was also freezing (epi side affect) and shivering uncontrollably. Then I spiked a fever and had to be in the hospital for an extra day.  In total, between my failed induction, c-section, and extra mandatory day, I was in the hospital for 4 nights. My recovery was pretty easy - I was sore for awhile, but it wasn't horrible..

My second daughter was a VBAC. Her birth was pretty much a breeze. My water broke on a Saturday night. She was born Sunday morning. We went home Monday morning. I did tear and I was sore, but, again, it wasn't horrible.

If I had to choose again, it wouldn't even be a contest. The VBAC wins hands down.

newly_naugler

I wouldn't have chose a c-section again if I had a choice. Recovery is longer, no lifting my toddler for 6 weeks, no driving for 4 weeks. I know that some vaginal deliveries don't go smooth and can have hard recoveries, but if I could avoid having a surgery, I do it in a heartbeat. You have a ton of options for pain relief so I would talk to your OB about your fears.

MamaKitty3

Ahhhh, the intrinsic to c/s or not to c/s question.  On one side you have the those who are sympathetic to the cause and then you have the side who feel that if you do a c/s you really haven't had the right experience and you are not a real mom.  It's kind of like the baby shower thing.  You would think that being pregnant and being a mom would be a beautiful thing but it is pretty much racked with judgement and nose turning as say....bigotry.  Nothing should be wrong with asking a question.  There are no stupid questions, just stupid answers/  So that being said...I had a c/s with both my children and will with the 3rd.  The first I went through 20 hrs of labor and then the doc announced I would be having a c/s because after not dilating past 4cm, I was too small pelvically whether baby was big or little anyway.  Yes, I did the wtf!  You are telling me this after 20 hrs!  I stayed in the hospital for 5 days with a fever.  The 2nd one was elective because IMO I did not want to risk the complications that came with trying a VBAC and yeah, already established that it was kind of moot anyway.  Stayed in the hospital for a day and half.  My recovery for both was actually not bad.  I think the key is to move around when you can, not lay like a log in bed if you can help it because the body needs the circulation.  Anyway, going in for a third and I hope to do just as well but it is surgery and anything can happen but it can also happen in vaginal.  Both ways of birthing is at risk for hemorrhaging.  Both have possibilities that nothing will happen.  In hindsight, I am glad my first doc had me go through labor.  I got the experience of going through it.  You should not rule out trying natural.  C/s should be more of if an emergency happens and electives if you already have one or there is a complication.  In the end, it is YOUR body and no one can tell you what to do with it.  You can also look into natural cesarean which they do like natural childbirth.  Very interesting.  In the end, decisions are all on you, just be prepared to be judged in all things but do not think you stand alone.

mommytoconnor

I am an OB nurse and I understand your fears.  All mothers have fears.  The thought of pushing a baby out of your vag is scary but it's par for the course, baby's gotta come out. In my hospitals and many others around the country they will not do "elective" csections because of the increased risk to both mom and baby.  First of all, babies born CS have more breathing problems due to not being squeezed out of the birth canal. You inherently loose much more blood during a CS, therefore you risk blood transfusion or worse.  It is major surgery.  They don't just cut your skin, your muscle layer as well and that's where you get so much pain.  There is a risk of having your bladder punctured or other organ injuries simply from the surgery.  Recovery is much longer with a CS, which means it can be difficult to take care of your baby when you go home.  After CS you are in bed and we get you up and walking typically 6-12 hours after your surgery.  After surgery you are at higher risk of bleeding, blood clots, nausea, pulmonary problems, and yes even death.   I don't mean to scare you, but you need to be educated.  Most moms would never choose to have a CS, and many docs wont' do it elective. In my opinion, it's a fairly safe surgery typically, but things happen and there are bigger risks than with a vag delivery. 

thehauffamily

Personally, for me, IDK why your dr would consider one unless it's medically ness. 

I asked for one...NO I BEGGED for one with my first b/c we had twins and I'd been carrying around a stillborn for 3 months of my pregnancy and I didn't want to deliever a still born and our son.  He wouldn't do it!!!!  He calmly talked us into trying vaginally because it was the best option for us recovery wise. 

Thankfully, I had amazing nurses who said if I wanted a c/s I could have one and they could make it happen.  They understood my situation and completely understood me not wanting to deliver both of them.  

We chose to go ahead and try vaginally, our son was coming out first, and he had complications and we ended up in a c/s anyways, which honestly I'm glad we did. I think it would have been to emotionally scaring to deliver our stillborn Matthew.  BUT, if we had a DIFFERANT situation, I would have tried a little harder to  have him vaginally.  

Now going on #3 c/s I REALLY want a VBAC, I feel like I missed out on "giving birth" even 7 years later.  I'm going to a pretty VBAC friendly hospital, so I'm hoping to go into labor on my own before my c/s date.  If I do, I'm hoping to convince the nurses to let me labor a while before they call my dr. and hopefully I'll be far enough along that he will let me try for a VBAC (but if not i'm prepared for another c/s).    

I say try.  Worse can scenario, you end up with a ECS!  I think you will later regret having a c/s over a vaginal birth without trying.

wimb01

I personally would never choose a c-section, but after 8 hours of labor, I ended up having one. I was devestated, but realize it was for the best. I didnt ge to hold my baby until I was wheeled into recovery. The worst part was how itchy the morphine made me the next day, and I was afraid to get out of the bed. On the second day, I felt like a million bucks. I consider myself lucky at 5 weeks pp with no pain at all, my scar is tiny and fading more every day. They gave me a perscription for 30 day supply of pain meds and I think I maybe took a total of 4. I wasn't allowed to drive for 2 weeks or lift anything other than my baby in her car seat....granted she only weighed 6lbs when we left the hospital. I feel I had an easy recovery compared to some vaginal births I have heard about. Good luck!

kcisthebombdotcom

I would suggest getting some therapy before making this decision. Having elective surgery that comes with risks for both yours and baby's life solely because a vaginal delivery is scary is not a good reason. Just because prior elective surgeries have been successful doesn't mean a c-section will be. It's a whole different ballgame with a child's life involved.

Fetal size does not always guarantee a tough delivery and the size of your parents' children doesn't mean yours will be big. My SIL tore badly with a 6lb and she's a larger girl while my incredibly petite friend delivered an 11lb baby with little tearing.

SheLovesMrHip

Well here are my thoughts and ,ike I said, MY thoughts. Why would you WANT to have a major surgery if it isnt needed? Why would any doctor even offer this is still beyond me. I know mine doesnt. I HAD to have one for 2 different medical reasons and while mine was a breeze there is always a chance God forbid something goes wrong. Anf then what? You family is left without you because of your elective surgery? I have had ONE elective surgery but let me tell you how crappy is is to have  several others that are out of your control. Yes people have big babies but guess what women have birthed them all just fine. Let nature do its thing and if it isnt meant to be then the staff will prepare you for a csection.

I get being freaked out but the risks of a MAJOR sugery should freak anyone out more.....ok thats all I have to say. GL!!

penguingrrl

I understand fear and anxiety surrounding giving birth and think that's perfectly natural. And our culture has become so caught up in elective procedures that I think people frequently forget or minimize the risks posed by having elective surgery. But surgery is very risky and I wouldn't choose a c section over a vaginal birth just because the OR seems less daunting.

I had a c with my first. Following the procedure I spent 12 hours vomiting uncontrollably from the morphine (turns out I have a strong reaction that my OB is classifying as an allergy for hospitalization purposes). I wasn't able to hold or even see my daughter for 13 hours after she was born. After that my recovery wasn't bad. I was off the percocet by the second day, off advil by a week post-op. But that first 12 hours was a nightmare I'm never willingly going to relive.

When I had my second she was a VBAC baby. I still didn't have an easy delivery, but I was walking within two hours of giving birth and up for walking to the playground around the corner with her when she was 3 days old. It was like night and day. I'm hoping I'll be able to have a VBAC in February when I have my last baby because I fear the thought of trying to recover  from a C with two kids at home, not to mention the longer hospital stay and not wanting to be away from my older two that long.

crucifiedlullaby

Honestly, I loved my C-section. I understand all the fear/danger surrounding it but truth be told, normal delivery has risks as well.

It's a personal decision that you should discuss with your doctor/husband. And, don't let anyone make you feel bad about what you choose.

Does your doctor allow you to do elective C-sections?

TX-Bride

Don't let anyone judge you why you want to do an elective Csection. I am opting for one, too. Ask any Obgyn and they will tell you that in the long run it's a lot better for the health of your lady parts.

JSabs09

TX-Bride:

Don't let anyone judge you why you want to do an elective Csection.

I agree with the above.  It's your decision - along with your doctor's.  I would not have opted for a c/s but mine was medically necessary.  However approximately 1/3 of women end up with c/s for one reason or another.  

 In regards to the c/s - what you need to know is this: I have found there is a huge difference sometimes in c/s stories and recovery stories depending on if the woman's c/s was an emergency OR scheduled.  Mine was scheduled due to a breech baby.  It was fine, my baby is wonderful and my recovery has been fine as well.  I've had friends who had emergency c/s and were upset by it - whether recovery was tough, they were disappointed in not having a vaginal birth or whatever their reason may be.  Everyone that I know who had a planned c/s had a positive experience.  Someone mentioned something about abs not being the same again?  My abs have recovered fine but I worked out prior to, during pregnancy and shortly after when I felt well enough and started slow.  I've also heard horror stories of vaginal births as well. If I have another child, I will choose a repeat c/s due to my own personal opinion on my surgery and recovery.

Bottom line, there are pros and cons to both c/s and vaginal births.  Every situation is individual and it's really up to you and your doctor.  Good luck!