*silliestbunny* books for toddlers

Dr.Loretta

Hi, I saw your post in the moms check in. I really like Your Toddler Month by Month. It's edited by a cognitive neuroscientist (I think?) who talks a lot about how your toddler's actions are caused by the different developmental things going on in their brains. It has helped me have a lot more patience with DD.

I have also heard good things about 1-2-3 Magic and Happiest Toddler on the Block.

GL! I'm right there with ya.

CaptainSerious

I liked 1-2-3 Magic and Parenting with Love and Logic.  The first gave us the quickest results, but the second forms the foundations of how we try to parent.

In the example you gave about your oldest not wanting to come in, you said that if you pick her up, she'll throw a fit.  So what?  Let her.  When she sees that she can't get her way even if she throws the fit, they will become less frequent (after first getting longer and worse).

Believe it or not, we went through this behavior with M, even though he was much older.  When I couldn't physically move him anymore, we started letting him make his choice (stay outside), but then he'd have to live with the consequences (whatever punishment we decided, best if it can be directly tied back to his behavior).  So, if he decided to stay outside when I wanted him to come in to do his homework, for example, I might not let him stay up to finish his homework (and he'd have to face the consequences at school) or I might not let him have any free time (e.g., play video games or watch tv) after his work was finally done, because he already took his free time outside (instead we'd do something together (which also fosters bonding).

J's very, very stubborn, and for him, I often use physical "force."  For example, if he won't stand in church or hold our hand when there are cars around, I will pick him up.  Once, when he was running all over Costco and picking everything up and moving it, I made him sit in the cart.  When he would pee in the hallway rather than use another bathroom because the one he wanted was occupied (he did this at least 4 times, including peeing on the carpet in his bedroom and in the kitty litter; none were emergencies, and he is otherwise completely potty trained), I bought him pull-ups.  Just the threat of him having to wear them put a stop to the behavior.  He's 6.  For him, the embarrassment factor of being treated like a baby is worse than any punishment I could dole out.  

Good luck!  I know this period/age isn't fun! 

silliestbunny

Thanks!!! Just what I was looking for.... now finding time to read is a different challenge