Pregnant after 35

Family response innapropriate

Well.... apparently my husband let the cat out of the bag the other day when he attended my family Thanksgiving shin dig w/o me b/c I had a sinus infection.... and OF COURSE my aunt had to put her 2 cents in about how we shouldn't be having children b/c of my age and b/c my husband suffers from bipolar and b/c we're both in recovery and have addiction issues.  Isn't that a horrible thing to say?  That a person should not pro-create because they have issues?  I mean.... really?  Isn't that called genicide or something? 

Re: Family response innapropriate

  • It amazes me what comes out of people's mouths that they clearly think is okay/appropriate to say.  I am so sorry that she said that!

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  • Whoa. I can't believe the nerve of some people! Wow. Sorry you had to hear that!
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  • Does your aunt have kids? Because some people would consider it inappropriate for her to procreate considering she has diarrhea of the mouth and is a douchecanoe. Wink

     

    I'd much rather somebody procreated who HAD addiction issues but conquered them than the incredible amount of people I see every day who HAVE addiction issues (is it an issue if you don't consider it a problem?) and can't get any part of their lives together at all... Sheesh! Everyone has issues... Does that mean that diabetics and people with family histories of cancer, heart disease, lung disease, etc. shouldn't have children? Wait-- I know, we'll have a master race of only genetically superior people without any psychological issues. We'll have to give them all lobotomies, of course, and we'll have to consult Joseph Mengele's notes from his time of experimenting for the Nazis...

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  • What a moronic and incredibly unsupportive thing to say!

    Only you and your SO know if you are ready to have children.  ...nothing like the support of family when you need it the most  (sarcasm)   

    Hopefully the rest of the family will come around and give you guys the support you need.

  • Thanks everyone.  Yah it is like a Nazi genecidal mentality isn't it?  It makes me so mad!
  • imagedanieleandwayne:

    Does your aunt have kids? Because some people would consider it inappropriate for her to procreate considering she has diarrhea of the mouth and is a douchecanoe. Wink 

    Oh my, I love you. But, then again, I am just a 38 year old, bipolar, pregnant lady, so what the hell do I know?

    To the OP --  I am so sorry that you had to listen to such nasty comments. Congratulations on your pregnancy, and good for you for working on your issues. You sound brave to me. 

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  • imageSeaConquest:
    imagedanieleandwayne:

    Does your aunt have kids? Because some people would consider it inappropriate for her to procreate considering she has diarrhea of the mouth and is a douchecanoe. Wink 

    Oh my, I love you. But, then again, I am just a 38 year old, bipolar, pregnant lady, so what the hell do I know?

    To the OP --  I am so sorry that you had to listen to such nasty comments. Congratulations on your pregnancy, and good for you for working on your issues. You sound brave to me. 

     Thank you... you're very sweet.  Yes... I have worked on my issues.... and you know what's really funny?  The aunt that made that comment is a practicing alcoholic!

  • I would send her a box of filter for xmas present!!

     

  • My mom says crap like that all the time about my fiancee. She has stated repeatedly that she thinks he should have been sterilized because he has Aspbergers and his kids from a prev. marriage are autistic. So her finding out I'm pregnant will be lots of fun. It's why I'm not telling her until after the 1st trimester is over. She causes me enough stress to miscarry.

    When people are negative and ignorant like that, the best way to deal with them is to walk away and refuse to listen to them; shut them down so to speak. And for sure let them know that you think they are ignorant.

     

  • I think it's good to know that you and your husband have "issues."  Lots of people become parents without dealing with their problems, and their kids can suffer because of it.  As far as the age thing goes, I personally think older moms rock!  I've never heard anyone complain of their childhood because their parents were older. 

    I know of people that won't have kids because they don't want to pass on a potential mental illness to their child, but I think it's a personal choice on whether or not to have kids, no matter the illness.  No one has the right to judge you.

  • She's a ***, but she isn't a Nazi. That's not genocide.

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  • Sorry to hear this.  Some people think they mean well but they should talk out loud in the privacy of their own home before they discuss what they are going to say in front of people.  With family like this who needs them?
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