Hey guys I was wondering for advice from someone who has gone through something similar, or a professional opinion.
A few years back, I found out that I was pregnant. I was kind of on and off dating this guy that I didn't love and we had gone back and forth about what to do about the baby. In the end, I decided to go through the process to give him up for adoption at birth (I myself am adopted, so it was a little bit easier for me mentally). I knew it was the best thing I could do for my child at the time and because I loved him so much I wanted to give him the benefit of a 2-parent, loving, secure family. It was an open adoption, but besides pictures, I have not contacted his new family, nor have they contacted me. Having had no contact with my birth family (ever), I felt that this was a sensible choice; I knew I was adopted as soon as I could talk, but have always felt like my "family" were the people who raised me.
Anyways, here is the new conundrum. I'm married now to a wonderful man (who knows the whole story), and we're expecting our own LO in 3 more months. How do I tell our child that he has a half-sibling? I'm torn between telling him early and having him grow up accepting the situation, or wait until he's older (and possible dealing with the consequences of hiding this from him). DH believes that we shouldn't tell him at all, but because the adoption was "open", baby#1 can essentially contact us at any time, and that might be a shock to our LO. I know I have some time before it might be critical, but any suggestions on when or how to tell our child about his 1/2 brother?