Name Conundrum

Raggedy1

DH has had his heart on two particular names if they're boys. One of them is after a grandfather who has passed away. My BFF just gave birth and gave her son the name DH loves. What to do? DH is angry that I'm seriously reconsidering, but I'm afraid my friend will be very hurt/upset if we use the same name.  The other part of it is that we'd agreed to keep our name ideas secret and now I can't ask anyone other than bumpies for opinions on the matter. 

yinyang124

Absolutely use the name! It has significance to you and DH, and your BFF should hopefully understand that.

wille2b

yinyang124:

Absolutely use the name! It has significance to you and DH, and your BFF should hopefully understand that.

this exactly

lynn0926

Use the name! It has a special meaning to you.  If it was just a name that you happened to like and she used it first, I would say find something else.  But, in this instance, it is significant to you!  Use it!  Once you find out what you are having, talk to you BFF and let her know the reason that you are using the name and she should be understanding.  If not, she will have to get over it.

Lil Kate

I would use it!

gault530

Ditto. 

lynn0926:

Use the name! It has a special meaning to you.  If it was just a name that you happened to like and she used it first, I would say find something else.  But, in this instance, it is significant to you!  Use it!  Once you find out what you are having, talk to you BFF and let her know the reason that you are using the name and she should be understanding.  If not, she will have to get over it.

rinascita

lynn0926:

Use the name! It has a special meaning to you.  If it was just a name that you happened to like and she used it first, I would say find something else.  But, in this instance, it is significant to you!  Use it!  Once you find out what you are having, talk to you BFF and let her know the reason that you are using the name and she should be understanding.  If not, she will have to get over it.

This!

People don't 'own'  names... it makes me so angry when people think someone 'stole' their baby name.  She'll get over it, esp. if she is a good friend. 

raraavis28

Ditto everyone! I'd still use it!

macchiatto

Since you already had agreed on it before you found out her choice, I would still use it but I would explain.

Ourfamilyof5

I would definitely still use it. I agree with whoever said that people don't "own" names. My MIL was pregnant with DH at the same time as her best friend and another close friend....they had their babies within 3 months of each other and gave them the same name. It had nothing to do with their friendships - it was just a name they all liked (DH has a very common name). All that to say, they never went to the same schools growing up and now that they're all in their 30s, they see each other MAYBE once a year if that (all living in different places). So the fact that they grew up with the same name is just no big deal...

If the name has family meaning, you should absolutely use it! 

kelandspence2012

lynn0926:

Use the name! It has a special meaning to you.nbsp; If it was just a name that you happened to like and she used it first, I would say find something else.nbsp; But, in this instance, it is significant to you!nbsp; Use it!nbsp; Once you find out what you are having, talk to
you BFF and let her know the reason that you are using the name and she should be understanding.nbsp; If not,
she will have to get over it.

THIS! I couldnt have said it better myself!

scorch

Do you love the names?  I would be kind of pissed if my DH just decided that's what the names were going to be and I had no say in the matter.

could you make it a middle name?  

Something similar happened to my BFF , except that the other person decided not to give her DD the name when she saw how upset my BFF was.  

I personally would have been really upset if my BFF gave her DD the same name as my DD, with no explanation at all.  

If you decide to use it anyway, just make sure that she knows with out a shadow of a doubt that you gave your son that name because it means something to you and DH and that it's a family name. 

tombomb84

No doubt about it - I would use the name but take the time to explain to my friend before the baby was born so she was not caught off guard by the news.