Special Needs

Guide Me Please

I've been talking about Owl a lot lately but we have another little one who I am concerned about.

We adopted Iz a year ago, we were informed that her bio mom was bipolar and most likely schizophrenic so I've been keeping an eye on her. I'm pretty sure she has ADD or ADHD, she can't focus for long and rules are hard for her but that is something we can deal with. I asked her Kinder teacher to keep an eye out for signs but she says she hasn't noticed anything abnormal. Iz does really well behaviorally in school half of the time, the other half she gets in trouble for talking or not staying on task.

My concern lies in other behaviors, she doesn't show empathy, there have been no tears shed over the 8 pets that have died in the last year, there was actually no emotion shown at all. She is very self centered which I know is normal at this age but it feels different with her. She reserves her best/manipulative self for people she knows she can work so that she can get the attention she seeks through behaviors she knows we aren't okay with. I give her positive attention but it seems like she prefers the manipulation to get attention, I don't get it.

Am I looking too far into normal 5 year old behavior or am I seeing something that needs a closer look?
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