Attachment Parenting

My 11-month-old is biting at day care

I haven't been on TB much lately, so I apologize if something like this has been posted recently. LO is nearly 11 months old and has bitten another kid in his room at day care twice this week. He has bitten me a couple of times, too.

I think he might be teething. I also notice that he is more inclined to bite if he's over-tired, so I try not to let him get out of his routine at home. Any tips on curbing this behavior before it turns into a habit would be much appreciated! (You would not believe the number of people who told me to bite him back!) Tongue Tied

DS 12/18/2011
DD 8/28/2014
DD 5/24/2016, stillborn at 40 weeks

Re: My 11-month-old is biting at day care

  • My son went through a short (thank goodness) biting phase at about that age. 

    I was very firm with him.  If he bit me I would say "ouch.  That hurts!  We do not bite" and I would put him down.  If he bit another person (he bit a girl at the library right in front of me) I would go to him and say "no biting", remove himself from the area, and then make sure to show all of my attention to the victim. 

    Essentially, a firm "no" and no extra attention for the biting.  At 11 months old you can't really punish - it is more about redirection and attention. 

    And I agree, the people who say "bite back" are horrible.  Talk about missing the mark by a mile. 

    Married 6/28/03

    Kate ~ 7/3/09 *** Connor ~ 11/11/10

    4 miscarriages: 2007, 2009, 2013, 2014

    *~*~*~*~*

    No more TTC for us. We are done, and at peace, as a family of 4.

    "Suffering has been stronger than all other teaching, and has taught me to understand what your heart used to be. I have been bent and broken, but – I hope – into a better shape.” — Charles Dickens

     

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  • Thanks for your reply! Yes, his day care teachers said he usually bites when another baby takes a toy. In those cases, I think he bites because he just wants something to bite, not in retaliation, KWIM?

    I try not to react when he bites for the same reason you said... he finds any reaction hilarious and I don't want to reinforce it. I guess all I can do is ride it out and try to watch him when I know he's in a bitey mood.

    ETA: meant to quote librarychica here, not sure what happened. Thanks again, ladies!

    DS 12/18/2011
    DD 8/28/2014
    DD 5/24/2016, stillborn at 40 weeks
  • Biting because someone took a toy does sound like retaliation and not a teething issue...just my opinion. Hoping you can figure something out and curb this phase soon!

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  • DD has/does bite, but it seems to go in phases.  She did it once because of teething, once because she wasn't feeling well (ear infection we didn't know about at the time) and wanted to be left alone, and most often because she can't communicate what she wants.  Unfortunately for us, it only happens at daycare, so there's little we can do other than talk to her teachers and apologize.  What they do there is keep an eye on her and try to re-direct before it happens.  When it does happen, they separate her and the victim and tell her "no biting, ouch, biting hurts".  Last time it happened it was in retaliation because another child hit her, so they told her to say "no" instead of biting.  All of this was backed up by my pediatrician too.  So, to me, it sounds like you're doing what you can and it might just be a phase to push through the best you can.  I always tell myself that I don't have to worry about being bitten at the mall, so she'll eventually figure out that this is not acceptable behaviour, just like we all did.  Good luck!
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