Thanksgiving with preemies

RobinR91

I don't know where else to post this. I have ID trips born at 31 weeks. They are now 37 weeks, home, and healthy. Next week is thanskgivingthey will be 38 weeks. My family is having thanksgiving close to me, as opposed to the usual 3 hours away because of my triplets. They have received one round of rsv so far. My families thanksgiving will have between 2025 people there. Do I go? I can't imagine risking one of them get sick! Do I keep them home and have my family roll their eyes bc the don't understand the immune system of premature babies? My home health nurse says keep them home for 6 months. My dr says avoid crowdsare we a crowd at 2025 people? What about Christmas? What are you doing for these holidays? Maybe it's the sleep deprivation, but I'm so stressed about this. Please share your thoughts::

mom2elijah

I would not jeopardize their health in any way. Therefore, if I were you I would have a Thanksgiving dinner just for yourselves at home. You can not please everyone and your main priority is keeping the girls healthy. My son was born in April and came home in May so we avoided the flu season, although during the holidays that year I still made sure everyone was not sick before we went. If people were sick we asked that they do not come over or we would not go. If I had been in your situation I would have kept them home for Christmas as well. 

KatFCo

With just one baby you'd be able to keep her with you at all times, but with three, there's no way you'll be able to keep them with you at all times. Those babies will be passed around and you'll spend your whole day wondering who has them.

With DD our doctor said to avoid places where people would want to come up to the baby, like church or large family gatherings. These are also the places where someone would still show up even if they have the sniffles.

Your family probably wouldn't be pleased, but especially with three of them, it would be so easy for them to get sick. If they're having it near you, maybe you can invite a few close (healthy) family members to stop by for pie or something after the main gathering.

punky917

As much as it stinks, I agree with others and I would skip it. Twenty to twenty-five people sounds like a lot to me and I would not risk the health of your children this early. We got a lot of people upset with our decisions as well, but we were looking out for DS's best interest.

We actually had people over for Christmas his first year, but it was immediate family only so, it was like 15 people and NO ONE was allowed to touch him until they washed their hands. Unless it was a doctor's appointment, we did not take Noah out in crowds until he was 9 months old in the spring. My BIL got married and I was a nervous wreck, but everything turned out ok. I wouldn't do anything differently-the sacrifice was worth him staying healthy.

jacque_z

I'd skip it!  I used the 'doctors orders' excuse quite a bit with persistent family members. 

ChiMookie

Hey my daughter was born at 29 weeks in August. She just came home and actually today was my due date. We are skipping all holidays and birthdays for the RSV season. My sister and I do every holiday together and I feel terrible. My husband and I have decided that one of us will go to drop off gifts for birthdays and to show our love and support. For Turkey day we are going to cook for the 3 of us and if the grandparents or Aunt/Uncles want to stop by after their main gathering for dessert we are open to this as well. Everyone has to have there flu shot, scrub up and not hold the baby .As much as I love to spend the holidays with my family the thought of spending any more time in the hospital supersedes this and I have become crazy about doing everything I can to make sure she stays healthy. My family lucky has been very understanding. Good luck! I'm sure you'll follow your heart and do what you feel works for you and your babies!

SBBBE

If I was you, I wouldn't even consider going to Thanksgiving. 25 people is considered a large crowd and with 3 babies there it would be really hard for them not to get passed around. They are still too young. Blame it on the pedibwhich I am sure is the truth. Most people should understand but too bad of they don't. The health of your babies is more important. And ditto for Christmas. There will be plenty of holidays in the future you can all spend together just not this year.

FYI I have 33 weeker twins that were born this summer. My mom usually hosts thanksgiving and Christmas and around 35 people attend. This year she informed everyone she won't be hosting due to the babies. It will just be my parents, us, my brother and DHs sister who all got the shots that we asked them to as long as everyone is healthy. I am sure people aren't happy but so far there have been no complaints to my face. It helps that my mom is backing me on this.

Gl making your decision!

RobinR91

How's this for a twist!? I talked to ther ped, whom I love and trust and he said to "enjoy the holidays with the fam. Yes there is risk, but you take precautions no kids touching them, minimal handling, eat, say helloleave and that needs to be balanced with living a normal life." Ack! So confused. This parenting thing is a tough gig!

AndBabyWouldMake5

I agree with pp, just had to ad my 2 cents... order a premade dinner to be delivered to your house and enjoy the holiday with just your DH and babies!

Pips09

I would also skip it. It's not worth the risk.

PeridotEyes

We're skipping it this year and I'm about to deliver a full-term baby

The year we had DD our pedi told us to skip it because its flu season and it's especially rough on preemies. There are normally 15-20 at our gatherings, including kids. Maybe a few family members could come over and bring you some yummy leftovers?  

ETA: My family was very understanding with our preemie and with this baby-to-be. They would rather we play it safe... maybe yours will be understanding too. 

PeridotEyes

RobinR91:

How's this for a twist!? I talked to ther ped, whom I love and trust and he said to "enjoy the holidays with the fam. Yes there is risk, but you take precautions no kids touching them, minimal handling, eat, say helloleave and that needs to be balanced with living a normal life." Ack! So confused. This parenting thing is a tough gig!

 That's ridiculous, imho! I can only speak for me and my family, but if we would have went, my stress level would have been thru the roof and there is no way I could ensure all of those people use proper hand washing/hygiene, nor could you control the amount the babies get passed around. Don't let family pressure you... trust your instincts. There WILL be a risk of cold/flu no matter what in a crowd like that. I'd always try to look ahead and think "which would I regret? Missing the holiday & knowing our health came first or going and potentially facing an illness later?"

There is plenty of time to balance with a "normal" life when flu season has passed and their immune systems are built up. That was a cop-out answer from your pedi imo.