Help me understand this
I will never understand how a parent can not have a desire to see there child everyday. I am the proud mother of a 13 month old boy named mason, who is truely the love of my life. Masons father decided that responsiblity and establishing a family was not for him yet so he moved out when Mason was 7 months old. He immediately got into another relationship and has barely seen our son since. I dont understand this. How can someone have a child and not want to see them grow and change. I loose alot of sleep over this, I am fearful that my son will feel like he is missing out by not having a permanent and stable male figure in his life. Im sad for him that he will never know what its like to live in a home with his family. Ive tried talking to his father multiple times about being more consistant with visitation, and still i get nothing out of him. I love my son more than anything and i know that i am doing the right thing by being the reliable and stable parent, but i never realized how lonely it is to be a single mother. Im afraid im always going to be alone since i dont have the opportunites to go out and meet someone new. Anyone else out there feel this way?
Re: Help me understand this
I can relate to all of this. My ex has seen DD ONE TIME (she is 14 mnths old). The only time he saw her was at a paternity test!!!! Not even a visit by choice. I have tried being civil with him and telling him to call anytime he would like a visit. A few times he has made plans to come and then just never follows through. I have now stopped trying to foster a relationship between him and DD. She is not old enough yet to understand but I am scared for the day she does.
It is very lonely being a single mom. i work fulltime and take care of LO, doesnt leave much time for a social/dating life. I have completely grasped now that EX will never be a part of DDs life. She wont know whats its like growing up with a father so the little family i am creating with her(just the 2 of us) will be all the family she needs
Our situations are so similar its creepy.
My ex and I were together for four years; planning a wedding; and then someone had to make the joke...of all times for you to get pregnant...you'll do it now...a couple weeks later...I was pregnant. He changed from the guy I was completely in love with and ready to marry into a complete stranger.
We both have 9 y/o girls from previous relationships. We told our kids, family, friends. Everyone was very happy and supportive. Thats about when he decided we couldn't get married because we were having a baby. His motives were legitimate but there was never any talk of post poning til a later date...it was just canceled.
We moved into a bigger home to accomodate everyone's needs. Then he threw himself into work. I was stuck at home being pregnant with this baby that I was ecstatic to be having but I was alone. Long story short...
I'm now 26 weeks pregnant. I live 3.5 hours away from him. He told me before I left if I did in fact leave because we were having problems, he didn't want anything to do with our child or me. To this day, the longest we have gone without talking to each other is maybe a few days. He has a mental disorder that keeps him from traveling too far from home and I told him I wasn't moving back again (if I did go back to him, it would make number 4).
He always said that his reasoning was that he didn't want to be anything other than a full time dad....he didn't and still doesn't want to be a part time sperm donor who happens to be a neat place to go visit...
We mutually agreed to disagree. Its better than fighting all the time. I'm still just a little awkward at answering the questions...what's his last name going to be? What are you going to name him? Ya know what I mean....I never thought I would be doing this without him and here I am...
If you need to vent...hit me up...I so know where you're at right now...
I can't really say if BD will want a relationship with our son after he's born. I'm really torn over this because i want my son to have/know his father but I also don't want that jerk coming around only when its convenient for him, or wanting to be involved for a short time then decide he can't do it. (which he's done twice now in this pregnancy)
Stay strong, keep your chins up, ladies.
Im so sorry you are gonig through the feelings of all this now. It SUCKS to be pregnant and alone. I can tell you that once my DD was born everything changed for the better. Once you hold your child you are not alone anymore, the only thing that matters is your LO and you wont want BD coming around causing stress. I was so scared when i was pregnant of raising my child alone. A year later i can tell you it is a breeze compared to my horrible relationship with EX. I wish he would change and be there for Lo but i dont want him in my life what so ever