unexplained infertility.....and IVF???

jess8788

So i met with my regular OB/GYN today to go over everything from the RE and he thinks my RE is right in wanting to do IVF for a "probable success" in pregnancy as he stated. He said obviously I would have to be emotionally ready and decrease my stress level.

I dont know what to think. I was pregnant twice with 2 chemical losses and that was awful. I cant do it again.....and the financial burden holy cow! I know this is so much to take in.

SO now I would love to hear from the unexplained woman---how did you know it was right? how did you trust it to work?? Im torn and would love some advice. Thanks a bunches!!!!

kgs0505

Unexplained is a really hard non-diagnosis.  I went thru the whole bit, Clomid, IUI w/Inj, and finally to IVF.  Nothing worked.  We took a 3 year break and adopted our son.  The only reason we tried once more is because we had some frozen embryos left over from the fresh IVF 3 years prior and we wanted to use them up.  We did not expect it to work at all.  The only thing I did different was stop taking Advil.  That's it.  I still drank caffeine and all that. Was the advil the key?  Probably not, but who knows? 

To our shock it worked.  The embryos weren't even then best we had ever produced, they were just "ok".  Well, one of them stuck and then split into twins.  But the cost was huge emotionally and financially over the years.  If you really want bio kids, it is a numbers game.  It's definitely possible, but it is a risk either way. 

I can't tell you that I knew it was right.  I was pretty jaded by the end.  I never got pregnant before this one... not even for 5 minutes.  I just needed to use up the remaining embryos, I felt strongly about that.

jess8788

Ive done 2 clomid cycles and an injectable with an IUI with all fails!! My thoughts right now are just to enjoy my holidays since last christmas I was crying in bed because I had just had my loss.

I figure Ill give myself a few months to change my attitude and see what happens and than Ill know if Im ready or not. 

No he has no ideas.  He said to make sure im relaxed by doing yoga or acupuncture and my DH agrees with him.  Just talking about this journey I cry, literally and my DH doesnt know what I cant just have a conversation about it.  Its taken over my life, the things I enjoy.  Its awful. 

Im not opposed to the injections since I did it with the IUI (even though thats only 1 a day), I just wish I knew it would work! As does everyone else I know. 

So I think time to regroup my thoughts and funds will help me to decide and DH as well. 

Thank you for your advice. Very helpful. And CONGRATS DUCKY!!!

jess8788

KGS,

Great story!! I hope that we will realize whats best soon!! And congrats!

Gregermis

We have mild MFI, but IUIs/IVF should have fixed our issue.  So I'm sort of unexplained.  We did 4 IUIs with one c/p and for us it was the next logical step.  I'm not sure why I (we) were ready.  Part of it was going through the motions of the IUIs I think.  Part was learning that I really wanted to try for a biological child more than I realized.  I wouldn't have been ready for IVF if we had not done at least 3 IUIs (DH wanted to do the fourth).

Now, after starting the IVF process, I had another c/p, followed by an early m/c.  Doing IVF doesn't garuntee that you won't have another c/p.  I would suggest waiting a little while until you feel you can brave another c/p if it's really going to be that hard for you to go through another one.  Hopefully you won't, but you have to keep that in mind I think.

ermo515

I am unexplained as well....Yes, its incredibly frustrating bc the doctors always seem to think that every new month and every new treatment is promising.

 My history is in my sig...we did lots of rounds of medications and lots of IUIs and we never got pregnant. We did IVF, got pregnant, went through beta hell for a while, then miscarried. We waited 2 months, did an FET, and I am now 32 weeks pregnant and everything is going perfectly. I am so glad that we went for that 2nd IVF cycle and didnt throw in the towel after the 1 failed IVF.

The expense of IVF is a shocker and is really extra frustrating when they cant give you a reason why nothing is working. IVF does not guarantee that you wont have a chemical pregnancy or miscarriage and it certainly isnt guaranteed to work the first time or even the 2nd or 3rd, even with unexplained infertility. One thing for sure though is that your odds are certainly way higher than any other treatment with IVF and if you dont give up, you have a fairly good chance of getting your baby.  

 Good luck! 

 

kmc84

We are unexplained also. It is hard when you can't get an answer as to why you can't get pregnant. Our history is in my siggy. We tried it all! It sounds like taking some time off would be a great idea before you persue any more treatments.  IVF is a huge emotional rollercoaster.  If you do choose to do IVF I would strongly suggest doing accupuncture with someone who is familiar with the needs of someone undergoing fertility treatmenta. Ask your RE office for a recommendation. Accupuncture has been shown to increase success rate in IVF.  If the financial burden is a big factor, it might be worth it to save and go right to IVF next to give yourself the best chance at getting pregnant, rather potentially try several more IUI cycles and using money on that.

I had a lot of trust in my RE and his staff. They were very surprised IUI didn't work for us. IVF, as is everything else in life, is not a guarentee.  C/p's, b/o's, and m/c's still can and do happen.  IVF is the only way your doc can look at your eggs and embryos to see if there is another issue that was previously unknown.

Good luck with moving forward and I hope you get your take home baby soon! 

jess8788

thanks everyone so much. and yes, a break to enjoy my husband and family is what i need i know that. best of luck to you all!!

crt0323

I'm unexplained as well and took oral Meds for about a year and did one iui.. At my first appointment my RE had a plan that we would try oral meds and iui's and then IVF would be our last resort. After 1 failed iui and one cancelled iui, I was ready to move on and begged for them to let me go ahead with IVF ASAP. Luckily, they honored my request. I had a chemical pregnancy with my first cycle and I'm currently pregnant as a result of my second cycle. My RE did say after my second cycle that I could possibly have some egg quality issues which would explain my infertily. Out of about 20 mature eggs retrieved and fertilized each cycle, we only had 2 to transfer and none to freeze. Egg quality issues can only be discovered through an IVF cycle. It is a huge financial burden but for me. It has been worth it all and Im so glad I pushed going ahead with IVF. I just had this gut feeling I was wasting time with the iui's. Good luck with your decision!

4legsRbest

Other than my endo, I am unexplained. Honestly, I thought why the hell not? Nothing else worked (lap, IUI, etc.). My RE said I was a wonderful candidate (he suggested I skip the IUI which I was hell bent on trying) and DH and I had the money in savings so while it was a financial risk, it was a relatively small one to us overall. It isn't that I explicitly trusted it to work, but something had to work and I had to try something new. It isn't for everyone but I kick myself all the time for not seeking intervention at the IVF level sooner. Had I known then (August of 2009 when we started out TTC journey) what I know now, my life's story would be so different.

I think the answer lies inside of you - it is corny, but true, when they say "you'll know when you know".

GL to you whatever you decide!!

Jenny935

I was unexplained with almost 3 years of TTC, a mc & cp on our own, and 2 failed IUIs. By then, I was emotionally ready. (Full disclosure: I had coverage for 2 IVF cycles.) On the day of our first fert report, we got our diagnosis...my eggs (at least the good ones) are wearing full body armor and sperm can't get in. I could have kept trying forever & it most likely wouldn't have worked. So now I'm not unexplained. Best of luck with whatever you decide!

lily_721

We were unexplained.  We had slight indicators on a few things here and there but each time the RE dismissed it as the actual reason.  First RE recommended IVF right away -- DH has inconsistent SAs (no explanation).  I wasn't emotionally ready. 

We had one unmonitored IUI.  I never wanted to do that again.  It hurt like he!! -- the dr had to clamp my uterus.  I was very upset that it was unmonitored -- I wasn't experienced enough to know that I should have demanded more.  It didn't work and I spent the whole time worried that we were going to have multiples. 

We switched clinics.  The new RE said we could do another IUI if I wanted but really felt that IVF would give us the results we wanted (insurance allowed me/RE to make this decision).  I was finally ready emotionally.  DH was ready (he was ready all along). 

I know that we are incredibly fortunate that this cycle worked.  I was prepared to start again immediately if it did not.  We still don't know why we weren't successful before.

nhamilton1008

We are unexplained and did 5 IUI's before moving on to IVF. I don't know that I ever felt it would work....I hoped it....but never really believed or didn't believe. It was just what we needed to do to try and have our own biological child. With that goal in mind, it made the entire process a little bit easier.

Don't get me wrong, it's a long process that is full of ups and downs. It's emotional and physical, but it is a completely viable option for unexplained. Like PP said, it allows the doctors to watch the whole process and gain more idea if there is something going on that they couldn't see with IUI. 

For us, IVF worked on the first try and we still have no dx. That is pretty frustrating to me still, but it worked, and that is all that really matters to us.

Good luck on your journey! I hope to see you over here soon!

MBfromBMC

I was unexplained IF and we were described as "good candidates for IUIs" and always responded well to Clomid and Femara. I didn't have any losses, just BFN after BFN. 

Since we are OOP for IVF, I really tried everything we could before trying IVF. We had five regular IUIs with an RE using Clomid and Femara. She understood that we could not afford IVF, so she entered us into a research study through her hospital. We did four more IUIs with "research meds" hoping to get a shot with injectables for free. We were assigned into the Clomid/Femara group and that was a big disappointment. We did four more with the study and got all BFNs.

After three years of TTC and two years in treatment, we decided that it was finally time to try. We had no insurance for injectable meds so we found out that IVF would only cost about $3000 more than another IUI with injects, which was about $4000. We saved and got some help from family and just decided to go for it this summer.

It's a really hard and personal decision, but it was pretty obvious to us that IUIs weren't going to work for us and we felt that we tried absolutely everything we could before moving on.

Basically, I trusted it to work because it just had to. I thought I could cope better with more BFNs than not trying at all.

I will say this, however - I did lots of research into success rates and pricing. I live in the Philly area and even though there are several great REs around here, I chose one in NJ because it was much more affordable.  If I had used some of the local clinics, I would have gotten one fresh cycle for $15k. At my RE, I got a fresh and a FET for $15k and it gave me a lot of security to know that I was getting two tries and not just one. Good thing because the fresh cycle was a BFN and this PG is from the FET!!

GL with whatever you decide. None of it is easy, but it's worth it... 

jackiejoey

Hello- I fall into this catergory somewhat... I was diagnosed with unexplained infertility and decided to IVF, however I never was pregnant before. As you can see from my siggy I am so happy I did...I am now almost 16 weeks pregnant! One thing great about IVF is they see the embryo quality before it is even in you, they keep such a close watch on you and your blood levels and make sure they are doing everything possible for you to have a successful pregnancy. I am so happy I decided to do it. I still look back and cant believe I was strong enough to do it but you would be amazed at how strong you are.

mirgirl

I am sorry to hear about your struggles.  Have you had a lap?  Like some other PPs, although I have PCOS and we have mild morph issues, our injectible IUIs should have overcome those issues.  My RE said in a situation where prior treatment should have worked, and so now infertility is unexplained, he always does a lap just to see if there is anything else we are missing.  We took his advice and found out I had stage 2 endo (even though I had no real symptoms of endo), which he as able to fully remediate.  We then went on to IVF and I am cautiously excited that our first time worked!  Was it the lap?  Who knows, but it is hard to deal with an unexplained IF diagnosis and it did give us more answers.  Good luck to you!

jess8788

I actually just went in yesterday and talked about the lap and since I have no symptoms and he said since I was able to get pregnant before he wouldnt consider doing the lap at this time. So I dont know.

The only thing is my husbands SA has a morph of 5%. So I dont know if this is an issue or what.