Intro... DD born at 36w, 4d on 11/6 (sorry long)

cmr5776

Hi ladies!  Due to IUGR, my DD was delivered via c-section 1 week ago today weighing 4lbs 7 ozs.  She has been in the NICU ever since. 

Good thing is she never needed oxygen and initially had low glucose and couldn't maintain her respiratory - she corrected these within 2 days.  Her bili levels were borderline for first 3 days but she never needed photo therapy.

I am pumping and my supply is good but, of course, she was still losing weight, dropping below 4 lbs.  As of yesterday, the NICU is now fortifying my breast milk (22 cals/feeding) and she's up to 40 ml's.  The problem is - she's not taking all of it - she still needs a feeding tube for every feeding.   

This is so hard, emotionally, for me. I've been able to stay at the hospital since being discharged Saturday as they have a boarding program but tonight I'll be going home for the first time.  I feel like I am having a mental breakdown thinking of leaving her.  How do you adjust / cope?  It's taking its toll on me, so much that I had to go to my Dr. yesterday b/c I now have an upper respiratory infection and I've only been at the hospital!  I haven't been able to see her until the antibiotics kick in (totally agree with this - don't want to endanger her or any of the other LO's).

It's just crazy. The Pediatrician in the NICU said to expect her to come home 10-12 days from birth but here we are at Day 7 and she's still not eating fully on her own. Anyone have experience with this?  My understanding is that she has to take a full day of feedings w/o feeding tube and then once it's removed, she has to take 4 'good' feedings within 48 hours.

Thanks for listening, this is just so overwhelming - I know I'm lucky - it could be worse. She is here

jcsntms06

Congratulations and welcome.

I'm sorry your having these feelings, but they are totally normal. It took both my girls (A born at 33w 4d and C born at 34w 5d) about a week or more to finally start gaining weight and figuring out the feeding thing. Hang in there Mama.I hope you start to feel better soon.

Jen3969

My daughter was born in August at 36 weeks exactly. She was in the NICU for exactly two weeks. She didn't require tube feedings at first but once she lost a certain amount of weight they started requiring her to eat so many ounces at one feeding. It started out at 25 ml and worked up to 40 ml by the time we were discharged.

I thought the tube might never get taken out because it was taking her what felt like forever to get the feedings down. One day it just clicked and she started taking the required amount at every feeding. By the time we were discharged she was taking more than the required amount.

 We were very lucky that we were only in the NICU for 2 weeks. I still felt guilty leaving her at the hospital every night. I just kept telling myself that I had to go home and I had to try to sleep. I was getting up at night to pump and would call the hospital every time I got up to get an update. 

My best advice is to take things day by day. Sometimes you have to take things minute by minute. Being a NICU parent is not an easy thing. I had to keep reminding myself we could be much worse off. I made it to 36 weeks, some of the girls on here have babies born at 24 weeks. Either way you are leaving your newborn in the care of someone else and that is hard on any parent.

 Congrats on the birth of your daughter and I wish you a quick NICU stay! 

brwneyedbuni

Congrats!

 Just breath. I swear your post gave me a PTSD attack. I can tell how stressed you are. The NICU can be so overwhelming, but like pp said. take it one day at a time. Before you know it, she will be ready to come home to you. I felt the days turn into weeks and thought we'd never get the babies home, but one day my DS just got it and flew through his feeds. Then all of a sudden they said he could come home in 48 hours. 

 Good luck! 

ahollo02

I know what you are going though. My baby girl was born one Nov 3rd at 35.4weeks and turned 37 weeks yesterday. She is still in the NICU for feeding issues. sometimes she does well and other times not at all. In order for my baby to be released, she has to eat 48 hours without her tube and gain weight 2 days in a row. It's very hard to deal. When I got discharged, the hospital offered boarding but it was all full. Having to leave the hospital without your child is total insanity. It is just not natural to do it. Not having her in your room after birth is bad enough but having to leave without her. Yeah right. And everyone (parents, friends) have these words of encourgment that they all say and think it will help you. Like, oh well you will look back on this time and it will be a blip in time, or the baby is where she needs be. All very true but not helpful at all.

 I am sorry that you are going through this. Noone should have to. I would not wish this feeling on my worst enemy. The ups and downs will kill you if you let them. So like the other post said, take it minute by minute. Stay busy when you are home for the night. And wake up trying your hardest to be positive for that baby.

jnikkib88

My baby was also induced due to IUGR.  He was able to come home two days after the feeding tube came out.  I had to supplement my breast milk with Neosure formula, either in a bottle or through a "french feeding tube".  (That's what the nurse called it anyway.)  Just hang in there and make sure you're taking care of yourself, too.  And you might want to make sure you have a carseat rated for 4 lbs and up, so everything's ready when your LO can come home.

MeatballEsq

Everything Jen said. My LO was born at 35w4d. Like your LO he never needed to be on breathing treatments and learning to eat was his biggest challenge. And like PP said, one day it just clicked. It will happen and once it does your LO will be discharged pretty quickly after. It was shocking to me how fast everything changed. But be prepared that there could be setbacks and you will need to roll with them.

That being said, being a NICU mom was the hardest thing I've ever experienced. The day I was discharged and had to leave him was one of my loneliest moments. I did like PP. I tried to get sleep and make it to at least every other feeding (except the middle of the night ones).

Congrats on the birth and GL! I hope your LO's stay is short!