I must be crazy...

asyph107

I just told DH I'm not sure I'm done having kids...I must be nuts! I said I was done after ds1 and then when ds2 had terrible reflux and didn't  sleep more than 45 mins for months, I said I was done. Now the thought of being done is terrible to me. Even though if I did I'd likely have another boy, which would be great but...I can't believe that I may never go through a dance recital, adorable girl rooms and clothes, prom dress shopping, wedding dress shopping,...anyone else long to have a different gender, not instead of what you have but in addition? Of course my career is at a pivotal time, still finishing my masters and if would be tough as hell to pay more to our nanny and still be financially stable but in a few years it may not be off the table. Anyone else rethinking the number of kids for more or less?

ophelia190

We always said we were one and done.  Now, we are both rethinking that idea.  On the one hand, it would be nice to be totally financially secure and able to totally pay for DDs college.  On the other hand, I can't imagine growing up without my sister and I don't want to deprive DD of that.  It would be nice to have a little boy too!  I just don't want to miss out on anything!

Tussie Mussie

I wanted two, and I wanted them close together. The miscarriage and complications this fall made that impossible, and now that Eleanor is getting older and more active I could really see only having one. I'm sure some of that feeling stems from being terrified of another miscarriage, and hopefully that feeling will pass with time. DH originally wanted one, but agreed to two for me. I love my sister to death and would love Eleanor to experience having a sibling, but at the same time, I can picture it just being us three. I guess since it would be dangerous to get pregnant any time soon I have time to figure it out.

Rebecca2024

We've rethought our number DOWN...

I originally wanted 5 children (I want an odd number for some reason); DH wanted 4.

When DD was born, I had to have a vertical and horizontal cut (they have official names, but I'm too lazy at the moment to look them up) in order to vacuum her big head back up my pelvis after getting stuck.

Apparently during the section, I started screaming in pain (because it wasn't a scheduled section, I had an epi only) because my epidural wore off, so they knocked me completely out for the 2nd half of the surgery.

They kicked my husband and daughter out of the operating room (- alone with no nurse even!) for him to walk her down two flights of stairs to the nursery without giving him any information on me.

He thought I was going to die.
He describes our daughter's birthday as the worst day of his life...

With both incisions, my uterus isn't really up to carrying 4 or 5 children.  The doctor said we'll take it baby by baby.

Our hope now is to have 3 biological children.
(I still want an odd number, and as an only child myself, I don't want an only.)

asyph107

Good to know Im not the only one. I just keep going back and forth. I think its going to be a daily I want another, no I don't, etc. I guess there is no pressure to decide now but I would not want a huge distance between kids either. I also love the idea that as it stands now, our boys could potentially be off to college by the time DH and I are 46. So then we would still be young enough to travel and do stuff we always wanted to do.

Who knows!! This is going to be an ongoing struggle for me at least.