Attachment Parenting

Tandem nursing moms ? for you

My son is almost 3 and my daughter is 1 month.  Since she was born, my son has gone from nursing 2-3 times a day, to 6-8 times.  This includes night waking and asking for milk.  I have let him nurse for the most part, but it is getting to be a problem.  He is now starting to refuse solid foods all together.  He was a very big eater before, eating 3 meals and 2 snacks with no problem before the baby arrived.  Today he has had one nibble of pizza and a few pita chips with hummus. It is 6 pm here, so he should have eaten more.    It is really the only regression he is keeping.  He wet the bed at night for 2 weeks, but seems to be over that already.

Any tips to help him get back to being a good eater?  Any ideas of how long I can expect this regression to last? Any advice to maintain my sanity?

 TIA,

Ivy

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Re: Tandem nursing moms ? for you

  • It gets better I promise. My DS is 2.5 and DD is 4 months. Right after I had her he was nursing almost as much as she was. We're now back down to once a day nursing the majority of the time. I think it just takes the older sibling some time to adjust to the baby and they nurse more for reassurance.

    For a while I was having really negative feelings about nursing both. What helped the most is going to the LLL website and reading articles about tandem nursing. It helped my to know my feelings are normal and also realize that it was okay to set limits on nursing for the older one. For me I learned I can't nurse both at the same time, it makes my skin crawl. So if DS wanted to nurse when the baby was nursing I would tell him to wait until the baby was done. In the meantime I would read to him or quietly play with him. When the baby would finish I would allow him to nurse if he asked but I didn't offer. At first he would always ask to but he eventually got to the point where he was busy playing when the baby was done and wouldn't ask. Good luck
  • It does get better/easier... with that said, I started doing limits w/ DS1 when DS2 was around 6 months (DS1 was 2 1/2), because I was going crazy. Things had settled down around the 4 mo. mark and then sometime around 6 mo. they got crazy again. So, I disscussed it with DS1 the day before and told him that tomorrow we are only nursing before and after sleep/nap (so 4x). We are still doing that (although he has dropped his nap and he doesn't always ask to nurse after his quiet time). Weekends he really only nurses first thing in the am, so I know he's slowly getting there. I'd be happy if he weaned Embarrassed since I'm tired of the aversions, but I'm also happy with the limits. I just had to make myself be consistent... which was easier than I thought it would be!!
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