Missing out on first dress

songstress503

So far DD has been given 3 christmas dresses, one by each grandmother and one by a great-grandmother.  I am very grateful that people are buying her presents, but I kind of feel left out.The same thing happened at Easter. I would really like the little high of buying babygirl her first dresses.  I feel I can't really go out and buy her my choice of dress because it would be wasteful, not to mention we now have to find occassions to wear these dresses.  They aren't bad dresses persay, one is pretty cute, but they are not my choice. I kind of feel like that is a mommy moment. One of the perks of a baby girl is being able to buy her pretty dresses, right? Because of the generosity of our parents, I haven't had to/be able to buy her any fancy dresses yet.  Is it weird of me to be a little sad about this? Do any of you feel the same way?

kristin172429

Nah.  I get it.  Just tell them for the next holiday/event that you have your eye on a special dress that you can't wait to get her.  If you really want to buy her Christmas dress, do it.  If she wears it on Christmas and people ask, just say you had already bought/picked out that one or something.

Jen0204

I would tell them that you're buying her the dress for her first birthday. Since you're getting so many dresses maybe you could assign everyone a holiday? That way you're not getting multiple dresses for each holiday and trying to do wardrobe changes so she wears them all, everyone still gets to feel included, and you get to buy her dresses for all of the unassigned holidays (and you get to pick, so you can save the days you want for yourself).

MollySm

I have this problem with all her clothes.  We never get to buy anything, because we've gotten so many gifts/hand me downs.  I love that people have been so generous with us, and with H in school it's so helpful, but I need to be able to buy her some things.  

I only have 1 christmas dress so far, and I had decided in my head that I was just going to buy her one anyway, so I can pick what I want.  And then my SIL, who is due with a baby right before Christmas said something about matching dresses that she was looking at!  In her defense, I've been talking about finding them matching pjs, but I did send all pj links to her rather than just buying a pair.  So hopefully she won't just buy a dress without telling me.  

I definitely think you should start mentioning that you are looking forward to choosing her first birthday dress!!  

jldubb0626

I get it! I'd still buy one that I wanted and have her wear it. If anyone questions it, you already had it ordered/bought and use the other dresses for other occasions.

songstress503

Jen0204:

I would tell them that you're buying her the dress for her first birthday. Since you're getting so many dresses maybe you could assign everyone a holiday? That way you're not getting multiple dresses for each holiday and trying to do wardrobe changes so she wears them all, everyone still gets to feel included, and you get to buy her dresses for all of the unassigned holidays (and you get to pick, so you can save the days you want for yourself).

I have picked out the patttern for her first birthday and asked Mom to make it, as I will be busy making my own

jju_stb_jju

my parents and mil are the same way! DS already has 4 christmas outfits and theres 1 i have my eye on! what we do is i will use one for his picture, one for midnight mass, and then the rest change him christmas day. for halloween he had about 3 "my first halloween" onesies so i just put one on himthe night before to wear to sleep, one the morning of and then changed him during lunch to wear the other one. if you find something you like, you buy it and put it on, and if they ask say you and dh picked it out specially for her!

heymommy

I'd be getting my own dress for when I want my LO to wear them. I'd put the dress others bought on LO and take a quick photo to share to prove that she wore it.

It would drive me nuts if people were buying a dress and expecting LO to wear it on a special day.

 

 My mom has actually done this for my older DD but it was ok the few times she did it because i did not want or have the $$ to spend at the time. And my DD was older and its not really as fun to shop for a bigger kid.

countrygirl0607

I made it clear early on that I would be the one buying dd her dress for holidays and i did not care who's toes i steped on but its my dd. Becasuse I know my mil would just go and do to it because she had made a comment a while back saying that she always buys the holiday clothes (dd is the first grandchild) when she said that I said not i would be picking out all of the my childerns holiday and speical occasion clothes. my mil almost brought ( with out asking ) dd a halloween costume, i said to dh that i would have been pissed and its not right for her to steal my thunder on things im looking forward to do or get for my dd he said dd would not have worn it and the same thing applys to holiday clothes.

HappyToBe2012

I get it. And it's okay to be sad. I already told DH this is something I get to do, not the grandmas. I even showed him the dress I want to get so if his mom asks, he can say I already picked something out. Though thankfully my mom and MIL are good about that sort if thing.

frasey

I get where you're coming from... my mom already got DD 2 Christmas dresses for us to choose from. I didn't mind too much, since I probably wouldnt have gotten her a special dress anyways. 

Buuuut if I were in your position, I maybe would tell her that you already bought/ordered her a special dress.  

MrMrsandBaby

I have the same problem but not with dresses (my mom and MIL seem to be good at satying away from those!).  Allison has FIVE Halloween outfits.  Yup, five.  Three are from MIL and two from my mom/dad.  They are all asking for pictures of her in the outfits.

I hate packing away clothes and finding ones that she hasn't worn...so I try to put her in them all but it is such a pain in the butt!

For the dresses I would just tell people in advance from now on that you have a dress you can't wait for her to wear!  Even if you don't...or ask them to come shopping with you for the dress?

lancyjo

My Mom and Mamaw have (graciously) bought all the clothes that Aria could possibly need until she's at least 18 months old. Couple that with what we got at my shower (shoot, the invites were worded "come shower Lancy with things pink and fancy for our little Aria Jo!") and I wouldn't need to buy Aria any dress for anything until at least next Thanksgiving. 

I still bought Aria's Christmas dress. It's the first holiday that I felt it a big deal to buy her dress myself. If asked, I'm just saying "We love all the dresses we've been given, but Mommy wanted to buy her first Christmas dress." We have enough functions around the holidays that the other dresses will get worn, and I know that my family/friends will understand.

Plus, since I don't have to spend much money on her wardrobe, I felt a little more free to spend extra on her Christmas dress. She'll only have her first Christmas once!