He made his decision.

kfarmer92

And bd decided not to be around. I gave him plenty of opportunity to be around but hes back to saying that my daughter isn't his. So he's not gonna be there for her. I guess i'll just have to be the best I can be for my little girl. I'm sad for her but hopefully when shes older she doesn't get mad at me for him being a jerk.

jnjmommy0609

What about a paternity test. Just because he says he won't be around doesn't mean that he gets the final say. If your truly sad for her you will do you part in trying to get a test done. 

TruN

jnjmommy0609:

What about a paternity test. Just because he says he won't be around doesn't mean that he gets the final say. If your truly sad for her you will do you part in trying to get a test done.nbsp;

This

kfarmer92

I asked him, he said no because he doesnt want to pay for it and there's no way I can pay for it. And the only way I know that they'll do it free is if im putting him on the birth certificate and if hes gonna be like that, he doesn't need to be. Also hes said done very hurtful things and I've been able to forgive him before but this time i've finally come to terms with the fact that he is emotionally abusive and I don't want my baby thinking thats how a female should be treated. So even though I am horribly sad that she won't have a daddy, she may be better off.

jnjmommy0609

kfarmer92:

I asked him, he said no because he doesnt want to pay for it and there's no way I can pay for it. And the only way I know that they'll do it free is if im putting him on the birth certificate and if hes gonna be like that, he doesn't need to be. Also hes said done very hurtful things and I've been able to forgive him before but this time i've finally come to terms with the fact that he is emotionally abusive and I don't want my baby thinking thats how a female should be treated. So even though I am horribly sad that she won't have a daddy, she may be better off.

I understand that. But be careful because legally this could bite you in the a$$. Courts do not care if you were emotinally abused...it's the child they are worried about. And if he wasn't abusive towards the baby then more then likely the courts will try and do visitations and things like that. So when it comes to that don't let your emotions get in the way

kfarmer92

I wonder what they would do if the courts saw it was in the child's best interest to stay away from him...because he has assault and domestic violence on his record. I left him shortly after finding that out. This baby was a huge suprise. Im blessed to have this angel but I would have never had a child with him knowing his background. Im just worried that history will repeat itself.

jnjmommy0609

kfarmer92:

I wonder what they would do if the courts saw it was in the child's best interest to stay away from him...because he has assault and domestic violence on his record. I left him shortly after finding that out. This baby was a huge suprise. Im blessed to have this angel but I would have never had a child with him knowing his background. Im just worried that history will repeat itself.

 

Sadly most courts don't do sh*t about that sort of thing until the parent in question actually does something to the child. It's sad. Even if they already have a history of it. Our systems are messed up. I personally have never dealt with something like this but recently a family member has had to deal with what you are afraid of and the kids are alive and well but physically abused and emotionally scarred. Sad thing is their other parent was always a dirtbag/loser/abusive and had problems with drugs. To top it off other questionable things against him the no one has been able to prove. Yet courts failed to prevent the kids from harm. 

Hopefully he never contacts you. But just a friendly reminder to not get your own self in trouble with the courts 

kfarmer92

Yea, I don't think he'll contact me. I just wanna keep my baby girl from harm I can prevent. That's all I'm worried about. I dont care about getting cs from him or anything because I will be finished up with school and working in the medical field about a month after shes born. So that's not a concern, I just don't want her to be abused in any way, no child deserves that.