Parenting after a Loss

Ughhhh

Someone please remind me it gets better.... One step forward three steps back!!! Ds screamed ALL night.. From the time I walked in the door until 9pm.. 

I hate colic.  Absolutely hate it.

Please tell me he will grow out of this soon?!?

Im tempted to call the ped tomorrow and see about bringing in him and switching his reflux medicine.. We just had the dose upped 2 weeks ago.. Things improved for a few days and now he is back to screaming all the time.. Spitting up after every bottle.. Arching his back, stiffening his whole body and just all out wailing,,,

God I'm so exhausted.. Physically and emotionally... I really am starting to feel depressed.  I keep telling myself that its not "me" and that its just that I'm coming home from work when his fussy period kicks off again.. But it's so hard to believe that. 

Ughhh. 

Loss #1: 18w5d.. D&E 04Mar03 BFP #2: Jun2011.. missed miscarriage. D&C 08Jul2011 8w4d. BFP #3: Nov2011.. Our Rainbow Baby!!! DS Born: 15Jul2012! BFP #4: Nov2012.. 2U1 - DS2 born 12Jul2013.  BFP #5: 01Jan2014..3U3!!

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Re: Ughhhh

  • (HUGS)) Im sorry you and him are going through this :( I truly hope he grows out of it very soon.

    TTC since 7/10, BFP#1~6/28/11(4wks2d)~EDD 3/4/12, missed m/c(8wks)~8/12/11, D&C~8/16/11
    BFP#2~12/15/11~EDD 8/25/12, Hannah born 8/22/12~ 7lbs 10oz & 21 in. long. :)

    BFP#3~1/12/14~EDD 9/23/14, Found out baby is a girl!~4/18/14 :)

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  • imagecharmedgrl517:
    (HUGS)) Im sorry you and him are going through this :( I truly hope he grows out of it very soon.

    Thanks.. Me too :-( 

    Loss #1: 18w5d.. D&E 04Mar03 BFP #2: Jun2011.. missed miscarriage. D&C 08Jul2011 8w4d. BFP #3: Nov2011.. Our Rainbow Baby!!! DS Born: 15Jul2012! BFP #4: Nov2012.. 2U1 - DS2 born 12Jul2013.  BFP #5: 01Jan2014..3U3!!

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  • imagecharmedgrl517:
    (HUGS)) Im sorry you and him are going through this :( I truly hope he grows out of it very soon.

    Thanks.. Me too :-( 

    Loss #1: 18w5d.. D&E 04Mar03 BFP #2: Jun2011.. missed miscarriage. D&C 08Jul2011 8w4d. BFP #3: Nov2011.. Our Rainbow Baby!!! DS Born: 15Jul2012! BFP #4: Nov2012.. 2U1 - DS2 born 12Jul2013.  BFP #5: 01Jan2014..3U3!!

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  • I'm really sorry.  For us, he turned a real corner closer to 4m.  The reflux stayed there, but we were very lucky in that the painful parts for him were controlled by the meds.  He just puked a lot.  It was happy puke, though.  We were also able to change meds around then (there was a national shortage on his first one) and that went fairly smoothly.  I was surprised.  

    Hang in there.  Improvement is not instant and it really is a two steps forward, one step back game.  Anytime we hit a growth spurt it felt like we'd jump several steps back.  Then, a few days later it'd be better.  

    I hope you get some sleep soon and get your happy baby back soon.  It is so hard to do the all night colic cries.  So exhausting.   So deflating.  You just want a happy baby and 4-5 hours of sleep in a row.  Such a simple thing to want and sometimes it seems so difficult to get.  However, you will get there.  

    BFP#1 4/17/10...EDD 1/6/11...M/C 5/28/10 BFP#2 11/19/10...EDD 8/4/11 Squeaker born 7/30.
  • I'm sorry.  I got my first taste of crazy screaming today and it was awful.  I know you regret the switch to FF because you feel like its responsible for the colic, but fwiw today was R's first day of all BM in a few days and the grumpiest he has had yet, including the screaming episode this evening.  
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  • Aw honey I'm sorry.

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    BFP#2 2/3/12 ~ Alice born 9/26/12


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  • Sleep deprivation isn't the problem.. he sleeps.  He sleeps well, actually.  He goes to bed around 8:30-9 and sleeps until 7-8am.  Lately he's been waking up screaming, but he'll put himself back to sleep..

    It's the CONSTANT non-stop crying when he is awake.. 

    Last night was a bad night.  He cried.. no, he screamed constantly.  But, my coworker reminded me of the days when he would scream constantly from the time he woke up in the morning until he went to bed that night.. and would wake up and do it all over again.. yesterday, according to DH, he had a good day.. just screamed from 4-9pm.  So, even that is an improvement from where we've come..

    It just gets so hard.  Because, few babies are like this.  It's overwhelming.  I'm exhausted because I get up at 5am, go to work, get home by 4pm, and then spend the next 5 hours trying to console a screaming child.  It's emotionally difficult.. I feel guilty.. I feel resentful for having to be at work.. I feel sad that I miss all the "happy" parts of Owen..

    I don't know.. I just wish he'd get through this and be normal.. just wish I could make eye contact with him adn talk to him and play with him without him screaming to the point of turning red and gagging.. having the ability to SIT with him would be amazing.. 

    But, no.  I hold him facing outwards in the colic carry and PACE around the house.. which usually works.. but last night, even that was a fail.  Everything was a fail. 

    I just keep telling myself.. tonight, when I get home, it can't possibly be any worse.. 

    Loss #1: 18w5d.. D&E 04Mar03 BFP #2: Jun2011.. missed miscarriage. D&C 08Jul2011 8w4d. BFP #3: Nov2011.. Our Rainbow Baby!!! DS Born: 15Jul2012! BFP #4: Nov2012.. 2U1 - DS2 born 12Jul2013.  BFP #5: 01Jan2014..3U3!!

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  • imagePetunia844:
    I'm sorry.  I got my first taste of crazy screaming today and it was awful.  I know you regret the switch to FF because you feel like its responsible for the colic, but fwiw today was R's first day of all BM in a few days and the grumpiest he has had yet, including the screaming episode this evening.  

    Not really.. I regret switching to FF because I feel like there's so much we missed out on.. but, at the time, we had no idea what was causing his digestive issues.. he was colic before we even switched.. in addition to allergic to milk proteins, and having other digestive issues.. the switch was because the NICU was having us supplement each feeding with formula because he wasn't getting enough by breast (because, they pumped him with almost 2oz every 3 hours starting at 3 days old -- no way I could keep up with that, let alone an increase in appetite!).. and, when he was having all these issues it was impossible to figure out if it was formula related, BM related, or a combination of both.. I really don't blame the formula for his colic.. I think he would have been this way regardless.. but at the time, he was going 5+ days wihtout having a BM and his belly would be SO distended.. he was in constant discomfort.. screamed from the belly aches.. at least switching him to Nutramigen helped to regulate him a bit.. usually we now get a BM 1x/day.. but even still, there are occasions when he goes longer and again his belly blows up like a balloon..

    I'm sorry Raylan had a rough day/eve.. hopefully, (and most likely) it wasn't BM related.. you guys have been working so hard on that -- you've come such a long way!  Hopefully today is better for you both :)

    Loss #1: 18w5d.. D&E 04Mar03 BFP #2: Jun2011.. missed miscarriage. D&C 08Jul2011 8w4d. BFP #3: Nov2011.. Our Rainbow Baby!!! DS Born: 15Jul2012! BFP #4: Nov2012.. 2U1 - DS2 born 12Jul2013.  BFP #5: 01Jan2014..3U3!!

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