Hi everyone! I am due in March and my little ones will be 21 months apart. When I brought my daughter home from the hospital, my in laws were very involved to the point where I felt like it was a bit suffocating. They were helpful and brought dinners to us every night, which I really appreciated. However, having them at our house every day for 10 days straight just felt too overwhelming to me. I didnt feel great during recovery, was emotional, and didnt feel like "entertaining" every day. Though they really did help- it still felt like entertaining to me and I just really had enough of their company.
I regretted not telling my husband to ask his family to give us some alone time. I vowed would not let this happen again the 2nd time around. Then........ I got pregnant a bit earlier than anticipated with baby #2.
So I dont know if it would be stupid of me to turn away help when we are home with 2. I guess my question is- did you really feel like you needed constant help in that first week when you are juggling 2 little ones?
Re: Help during Baby #2's first week home?
My DH only was able to take off work while we were in the hospital, so I really needed help. If your DH will be home, you may not need as much help as I did.
Also, if the help would have been my mil I probably would have gone insane. She is no help at all. When DS was born, she made things worse. Cried when he cried, stood around and stared at me, ate our food, etc. So, I'd understand if you said no help would be better than your mil...
We never had any help with either child. They were 20 months apart. No meals, no help with anything. Kind of depressing!
That's nice they want to help....but it can be done with no help either. I wouldn't turn them away.....they prob just love their new grandchildren and care about you and your DH
It might be harsh, but we didnt allow overnight visitors until the kids were well past a month old. DH and I handled it ourselves and I had 2 c-sections FWIW. We allowed people to come to the hospital then for our time at home we kept visitors to a minimum.
I don't see why you'd need extra help unless your DH is unable to take any time off of work. If not, I don't think it's inappropriate to say you want a few weeks to yourself to get in a good routine/get some good family bonding before accepting overnight visitors.