Ugh — The Bump
Secondary IF


Just found it that one of my good friends is preggo w number 2...she was one of the last of my friends who all had babies around the time I had DS who didn't allready have a second yet, besides me of course. Now I am feeling very sorry for myself, and dreading getting together with the group. Blarg.
TTC baby #2 since July 2011, DX: low AMH
BFP 1/21/13, blighted ovum m/c 2/12/13
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Re: Ugh

  • /hugs. I'm sorry :
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  • ugh. that is the worst.  I still feel like I am behind.  All the older kids are doing things that DS is too young for.  Plus several women in my group are having #3...i can't handle the PG talk.  I hope your time comes soon and you can just enjoy your friends PG with her.
    TTC#1: 14 months on our own (did HSG, b/w, SA);
    BFP on Cycle 14--TWINS! Identical twin boys stillborn at 19wks(1/9/10)
    3 break cycles; took clomid 50mg, BFP #2 Beta #1 35, Beta #2 338!!! Owen was born 2/11/11! 
    TTC#2: 4 cycles on clomid: BFNs
    BFP #3: Cycle #5 100mg clomid; beta #1 21; beta #2 6=CP 
    Cycle #6 break cycle TTC no meds=BFN
    Cycle #7: 150 clomid+ovidril+IUI=BFN (switched to RE)
    Cycle #8: follistem+ovidril+TI=BFN
    Cycle #9 Forced break due to cyst
    Cycle #10 follistem+ovidril+TI=BFN
    Cycle #11 follistem+ovidril+TI=BFN
    Cycle#12 Forced break due to cyst, went on BCP; did repeat HSG, Saline U/S
    Cycle #13 IVF: Follistim/Menapur ER 11-30 11 eggs, 5 mature, 4 fertilized and 3dt on 12-3; BFN
    Cycle #14: IVF#2 lupron/follistim/menopur ER 1-22, 19 eggs, 14 fertilized, 5dt on 1-27, BFP!! beta 1: 63, beta 2: 119; EDD 10-15-13; 1 frozen embie
    Miracle Surprise BFP, EDD 10-1-15; saw HB great Betas, 11weeks lost baby MC at home
    Moved forward with FET transfered solo frostie on 6-4-15, beta 1: 315, beta 2: 738, u/s showed one baby on track EDD 2-21-16
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  • Do your friends know about your struggles?  Does your friend who is pregnant?  Just be honest with them, and especially your pregnant friend that you may have to step away occasionally when you are all together.  Let her know you are happy for her, which I'm sure you did.  It's hard to see friends have children, when you want the same. 

    I have a friend who had an abortion a few years ago, met her new husband, who lost a testicle to cancer.  She worried that they might have trouble ttc.  They had their DD a month after their 1st wedding anniversary.  I have trouble always feeling happy for her.  It seems so unfair.  She knows about my struggles, and wisely doesn't say anything to me about it.  I've joked with friends that I would "race" them to see who gets pregnant first.  So far all three have had their babies already and we're no where near having ours.  Sorry just wanted you to know I understand.

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    DD conceived after 3 years of ttc.
    MFI - DH had varicocele repair and took Clomid to get DD b. 02/2010

    TTC #2 since 6/2010
    10/2012 DH diagnosed with Epilepsy
    A few failed IUIs summer 2012 and 2013. 
    DH taking clomid and waiting to see if he needs another vericocele repair. 
    Hoping for a 2015 baby or babies. 
    Wishing, hoping, waiting.

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  • Thanks all. I have seen others post similar things I here so I know it's a common feeling to have. My friends do not know about our issues yet. I go back and forth about wanting to tell them. I know they will all totally support me but I also feel like they just can't understand, not having had to ever deal with something like this. I mean, one of my friends got preggo with her third while on bcp, it's like she couldn't not get pregnant. How could she understand without feeling pity for me? Also I don't want to put a damper on my friends pregnancy or make her feel bad. When i was preggo with DS, another friend had been having trouble getting pregnant with her second due to endo, and when I got pregnant I felt so guilty. I don't want my friend to feel bad about being pregnant! Because i have been on that side too. It's so hard and I hate that I even have these selfish feelings. IF blows. Thanks for listening.
    TTC baby #2 since July 2011, DX: low AMH
    BFP 1/21/13, blighted ovum m/c 2/12/13
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