do you work FT AND have 2 under 2/3 yr old??

bsinno

IS IT POSSIBLE?!

 

we're in talks of adding to our brood early next year, making our kiddos at minimum 27 months apart. I'm racking my brain trying to think of women i know who have 2 youngsters and manage to work full time as well. I have no plans to stop working or go to part time but we know we'd like our kids close in age. How do you put 2 ids to bed at night? how do you drag 2 kids to daycare in the morning?! i just need to hear that it IS POSSIBLE and im not INSANE!!

 

thanks ladies! 

itsmevkb

I have a 6 year-old, a 3 year-old, a 15 month old and am about to have our fourth in just a few short weeks.

Is it possible?  Of course. 

My husband and I both work full-time, although my husband's schedule is more flexible than mine.  My husband handles most of the morning stuff - one of us wakes up the kids but he normally helps them get dressed and gets them downstairs for breakfast.  We all leave at the same time, with me heading off to work and him taking our oldest to school and the younger two to the babysitter.  Then, he normally runs back home to get ready for work himself.

At night, I normally round everyone up around 6:45 and the older two start putting on their pj's while I get the baby ready for bed.  Once the baby is in bed (by 7) then I help the older two with whatever they need and then we just hang out until it's their bedtime.  It's really not that hard.

I think the hardest part is when you have newborn because they aren't yet on a schedule but once they are things just seem to fall into place.

NicoleWI

I have 2, 22.5 months apart, and am pregnant with a third who will be 2 years from DS's age. There are lots of moms on here who do something similar. For us, b/c my husband works long and irregular hours, and I have a 40 min. commute, having a nanny is the way we can make things work. It makes things MUCH easier for me. I would recommend considering that option. 

I do want to cut back after this LO is born if I can, but we'll see how things go. On the other hand, I can also see how if you really love your job, it can become a nice "getaway."  

bsinno

thanks and congrats on your addition! 

LoCarb

My kids are exactly 2 yrs apart and it's possible. Like PP mentioned the hardest is the NB but even w/o other kids it's a really tough phase to handle. Most of the time the girls bathe together and DD2 goes to bed 30 min before her sister. We struggle w/ our 3 yo at times but that's b/c she's going thru a tough phase.  My 1 yo is sooo easy (finds wood to knock on). Completely manageable but I will admit the 1st yr is tough w/ a NB.  You get a routine and things go smoother.

brewcitybride

Yep! And all of my close friends do, too! It's hard work. Hard. Work. That being said, I wouldn't be doing it if it also wasn't enjoyable, fruitful, and rewarding. I love my job and I obviously love my kids. I am thinking one day of going down to 3 or 4 days per week, but that won't happen for at least 2 years, as my husband is working his way up the ladder, and financially I need to work fulltime right now.

Putting two kids to bed is pretty easy right now. Baby is in bed by 6:30. Then I have an hour of quiet time with DD and DH. Then she goes to bed by 7:30. Then I have 2.5 hours to myself, housework, getting ready for the next day, until I hit the sack. Of course, that all happens when everything goes perfectly, which doesn't always happen. Throw in a sick child, a husband who has late meetings, or if I have late meetings, and things can quickly turn into chaos. It's controlled chaos, though!

Pumpkin62307

Mine are 27 months apart, and YES, it is possible! It gets tough sometimes, but I just tell myself, I'm not the first mom to have this, and I won't be the last! And there are some that have more kids and/or more demanding jobs than I do! I'll be honest, a lot of time I operate in survival mode, and my toddler probably watches more TV than is recommended for him, but we are happy!

Our daily schedule is some variation of the following:

I wake up at 5am, pump, shower, get myself ready for work, and pack the daycare bag for the day. I wake DD (7 months) at 6:30 and nusre her. I wake DS up at 7 (or if DH is home, he wakes him up), change him, throw 2 waffles in the toaster which he eats in the car (the waffles, not the toaster), and try to get out the door by 7:20. Drop the kids off at Daycare at 7:45, at work by 8:00. Get off work around 5:00, pick kids up, home by 6:00, feed the kids dinner, hang out, bath time for DD (every other day) nurse her to sleep by 8pm, hang out, bath time for DS (every other day) TRY to get him to bed by 9:00. If DH is home I may be able to make dinner for myself and him, otherwise my dinner is either after the kids are asleep, or not at all. That's the only thing I really need to improve in my daily routine.

Good luck!

MammaBear81

Yes, it's possible.  I have 5 and my oldest just turned 7.  DH and I both work full time (I work days and he works nights).  We have an au pair for childcare (live in care) because with my hours it would be insane getting 5 kids up, fed, dressed, out the door and dropped of at DC by 7am.  Bed time is pretty simple in our house (everyone is in bed by 8:00), if you are considering having more than one child (at any age gap) you will have to learn to multitask to get everyone what they need when they need it, which you probably do with home and work anyway!

I will say it isn't for everyone, I know many mom's that have their hands full with one, but it is possible!

mexicolombiana

My 2 are 18 months apart.  We have a nanny so we don't drag anyone to daycare in the morning.  That helps A LOT.  If I don't have time to feed one or dress one, no big deal, the nanny shows up and magically does it all.  I recommend getting a nanny if you can afford it.  

As far as night time goes, we get home at 6 pm from work.  We play, eat dinner at 7:30 and start the bedtime routine around 8:30.  We do things late in our house because it works for us.  By 9:30 everyone is asleep (usually).  Then I clean, prep stuff for the next day, pick out the girls' clothes, etc.  Then I still have time to watch tv from 10 p.m.-11:00 p.m. or so with my husband.

It's a busy life but not terrible.  

I have a friend who has 4 kids under 5 and works outside the home.  She is a super-woman i'm sure  

bsinno

thanks everyone this is really making me feel better!

mrsseguin

My kids are almost 4 and almost 2 now.  They are 25 months apart.  I work 3 12 hour night shifts.  We had a hard time going from 1-2 kids, but it is doable.  DS is now in junior kindergarten mon-fri, it takes me about an hour to get all of us fed and ready..  Some days I do drop off's at 2 different places.  DD goes to DC and DS to school  It's not that bad, it's much easier now that their older.

That being said, we are going back and forth about having a 3rd child...we would not have them so close together if we do.  We would aim for a 3-4 year gap.  

Amaryllis619

:looks at ticker:

yup pretty soon i'll have 2U2 and I work full time.  I know it'll be a hard transition to start, but we are SO EXCITED to have our girls close in age.

mexicolombiana

Amaryllis619:

:looks at ticker:

yup pretty soon i'll have 2U2 and I work full time.  I know it'll be a hard transition to start, but we are SO EXCITED to have our girls close in age.

YES this is the best part.  My 2 year old is starting to really "play" with the 9 month old.  It's freaking adorable.  

MrsSDgirl

DH and I both work full-time, and our boys are 22 months apart.  It is HARD at first, but you'll find your groove.  Totally doable, and (almost) always enjoyable!  Good luck.  

ridesbuttons

Mine are 18 months apart.  Believe me, getting them to daycare in the morning is the least of your worries!  It is doable but prepare yourself to be very tired for a while.  However, there are upsides to having them close together too.

Annabelle81

Definitely possible! I'm considering adding a third, but that might be pushing my luck.  There are crazy days, but for the most part its a lot of fun.  The first six months were tough, mostly due to lack of sleep. My LOs are two years apart and now play together.  Our strategy is to divide and conquer.  We each get one ready in the morning. I do daycare drop off, my husband does pick up.  We each get one ready for bed and switch nights with each.  My 3 year old son takes a while to get to bed so the other makes lunches.  Once in a while, i'll have to do a day alone and that is exhausting! My time management and multi-tasking skills have grown exponentially. 

erbear

It's hard but not impossible. Mine are 3.5 and 1.5.

groovygrl

My situation is different b/c my two are the same age but yes it is doable, as everyone has said. I actually didn't find it that hard when they were babies, the baby is easy b/c you have more control (aside from teh bottle washing & prep crap at night), esp in the morning when you just dress them & carry them out. Once they were mobile and then old enough to resist leaving in the morning, it got harder for me- 2 kids to get dressed, get down the stairs, into coats, out to the car, tantrums, whining, etc.  Then we moved & new daycare doesn't serve breakfast, I was very used to not having to feed them bfast! LOL!

Getting 2 fed, bathed & down at night was a challenge for me for a long time, but again a different situation. You find a groove no matter what though- put the older one in front of a show or with an activity while you put down baby, then work on bedtime for the older one, or put baby in a bouncer or jumper outside the bathroom door while you bathe older one, etc (assuming you're by yourself, if you have help in the evening it is a lot easier). You figure it out, it is hard, you get tired...but I vote early bedtime for everyone makes for better kid sleep AND for some time for parents...

And as someone else said, people in really hard situations do it & have no major problems... I was on my own with mine for 4-5 months when MH moved to another state before we did, they turned 2 right before he left (he was home on weekends). We found a routine, I even had to have teh house ready to show when I left in the morning, we sold the house, we all got to daycare/work (granted, I had a relatively flexible job where I did not have to be there at the same time every day), I realized that I could do it on my own as hard as it was.

GL!

lindsay.lou

Mine are 15.5 months apart. I'm not going back to work FT until Feb/March, but I found this thread very encouraging. My main worry at this point is just getting us all out of the house in the morning!

laurakaz13

You are all very encouraging! I consider anyone with more than 1 child superwoman!  We are thinking of having #2, but I am worried about keeping our sanity!  Things with DD are so easy now. 

Breezy8407

Like groovygirl, I have twins, so my situation is a little different. These are my first, so I don't have any experience with a singleton.

I will say that I am overwhelmed but it's getting better. H and I both get them fed and ready each morning and both do bedtime right now. In a month or so, I will be doing some nights alone, so I am mentally preparing myself for that.

I pretty much never stop moving until bed time. The second I get home, it's baths, bottles, bed time, laundry, cleaning, etc. Sometimes I get a chance to make a quick dinner or go for a run. Usually that stuff happens on the weekend though.  

futuremrsmcnichols

Yes it is possible. My DD's are 21 months apart and I work FT. The newborn stage was a little rough but it got easier. For the first year or so we worked opposite shifts/days to avoid daycare. DH got a new job in August and things have changed a little. We still try to work opposite days (both work 3 12-hour shifts). My sister comes and watches the girls on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays. My mom watches them on weekends and Mondays and Wednesdays MIL watches them. We need childcare max 3 days a week so this works best for us. My mom and sister come to my house and it is so nice. We take them to MIL because she also watches SIL's 4 kids.

The days that we drop of at MIL's are hectic. I already have a 40 minute commute, and MIL lives about 10 minutes from my work but its an extra 10 minutes south of work. I work evenings so the time we leave is right around lunch time (1230 at the latest so I can be at work by 2pm). These days, we end up getting fast food because there is just not enough time between packing the diaper bag, getting snacks/food/milk packed, getting them dressed and hair done, getting myself ready. DH does not pick them up until 7pm so they eat dinner at MIL's- and so does he usually.

DH has it easy because they are usually worn out by the time he gets there. They nap in the car during our 50 minute drive, and play hard with their cousins. They usually fall asleep on the way home and are out for the night. DH has it easy on these days. On other days, bedtime is not scheduled, but we make sure they are both in bed by 9:30.

I can't imagine having to do this drop-off thing 5 days a week. If this were the case, then I would definately be doing a FT nanny in my own home because it is just so much easier that way IMO.

cfitz16

Yes...we have an almost 4 year old, a 1 year old and both work full time.  It can be done.