Feeling crazy on Clomid - any coping tactics?

ZenGal13

Hi all! I'm new to the board here and hoping some of you can help me wade through some of this stuff and the emotional journey of all this. (Hopefully I'm putting my question in the right area, but if there's a better discussion category for this sort of thing, please let me know.)

Some background on me: been TTC since Aug. 2011. Was having increasingly long cycles (first 45 days, then 60, then 90, then 120) so started going to acupuncture in January. Got a period in Feb, then nothing. In April, got BFP, but had MC at 6 wks in May. 

Anyhow, now we're back to TTC and in Sept my ob/gyn sent me to RE for consultation, who said I have mild PCOS and prescribed Clomid, which I was excited about because it feels like positive movement forward. So on CD3 started 100 mg/day. Going in for mid-cycle US on Wednesday, so we'll see if anything happened follicle-wise, I guess. 

But, getting to my question - during 2 of the 5 days on Clomid, I felt so depressed and weepy that I thought I was losing my mind. Just emotional off the charts. It was like being an hormone-fueled emotionally unstable 16-year-old girl all over again (but, maybe that's the ideal state for getting pregnant? . Anyhow, it faded the day after I finished my last dose, but, MY GOD. I know mood swings are a side effect, but I thought I was losing my mind. I get stressed and anxious like anyone else, but have no history of clinical depression or anything like that.

Anyone else deal with this on Clomid? And if this first round doesn't take, anyone have any good diet or other lifestyle tips to manage the mood swings? 

Thanks in advance for any insights or shared stories!!  

 

 

mandaj02

Sorry you're going through all of this. I've been on Clomid for 8 months now. It totally makes me crazy so I feel your pain. It makes me very depressed, I hate everything in my life when I'm taking it. I guess the best thing for me is to try to talk myself down and say, you know it's the meds, you're ok, this will be over someday. I try not to make any major decisions. In the last 8 months I have wanted to change jobs, move, give up on having a baby, and luckily I have my sister and husband to tell me that I really don't want those things and to calm down. For me, Clomid works great, I produce 3-4 mature follicles a month so since it's doing the job (even though I'm still not pregnant) I feel like I have to deal with it. I think it's good to know that it's the meds. 

ZenGal13

Ha, yes, exactly! I hate everyone and everything! I broke down crying to my husband about how I had no idea where my life was going and no idea what sort of person I was and, furthermore, no idea if I had any moral convictions or values as a human being. It was a BAD scene, made worse by the fact that on one of the nights I had to go to a social gathering where two people announced they had babies on the way. Needless to say, I hated everyone even more after all that.

It totally sucks that you're going through this too, but thank you so much for writing and making me feel less alone. That's a great idea to try to make sure to avoid major decisions in the midst of the meds. Definitely trying to keep in mind that this'll hopefully all be for a bigger cause at the end of the day . Thanks again!

KdgTeacher

mandaj02:

Sorry you're going through all of this. I've been on Clomid for 8 months now. It totally makes me crazy so I feel your pain. It makes me very depressed, I hate everything in my life when I'm taking it. I guess the best thing for me is to try to talk myself down and say, you know it's the meds, you're ok, this will be over someday. I try not to make any major decisions. In the last 8 months I have wanted to change jobs, move, give up on having a baby, and luckily I have my sister and husband to tell me that I really don't want those things and to calm down. For me, Clomid works great, I produce 3-4 mature follicles a month so since it's doing the job (even though I'm still not pregnant) I feel like I have to deal with it. I think it's good to know that it's the meds. 

Umm, I hope you're done with it!!!

I found taking it at night helped.

jschwind22

mandaj02:

Sorry you're going through all of this. I've been on Clomid for 8 months now. It totally makes me crazy so I feel your pain. It makes me very depressed, I hate everything in my life when I'm taking it. I guess the best thing for me is to try to talk myself down and say, you know it's the meds, you're ok, this will be over someday. I try not to make any major decisions. In the last 8 months I have wanted to change jobs, move, give up on having a baby, and luckily I have my sister and husband to tell me that I really don't want those things and to calm down. For me, Clomid works great, I produce 3-4 mature follicles a month so since it's doing the job (even though I'm still not pregnant) I feel like I have to deal with it. I think it's good to know that it's the meds. 

Woh, what?  Isn't there a lifetime maximum of 6 rounds of Clomid?  In addition, why would you continue with the same treatment for 8 months?

OP, I'm sorry that you're feeling so crummy.  I've never been on Clomid, but I've heard that taking it at night helps.

mandaj02

My OBGYN had me on it for five months (unmonitored) before sending me to a fertility clinic. He didn't seem to even realize what he was doing until after I told him how long we had been doing it. He finally referred me. After I leave the fertility clinic, I will be finding a new OBGYN. Once I went to the consultation we made a plan, I took one month off in between. I then had IUI with Clomid and Ovidrel. I just had my second IUI and think that I am BFN again and will be going for a third IUI. So in total, I'll have been on Clomid for 8 out of 9 months and have not been on the same treatment. This will be my last IUI and last month with Clomid. I'm not making these decisions on my own, they're treatments made by a specialist. I've never heard anything about a lifetime maximum of 6 rounds or had a doctor mention that.  

larhun3

I take it at night which does reduce side effects IMO since I sleep through it. But it does make you more emotional bc it's altering hormones. I recognize it so when I start to feel upset or angry I slow down for a second before flipping out. I have had some crazy moments but nothing too horrible. The funniest moment I've had so far included telling my husband to "shut the F up"...I don't talk like that normally so he was stunned and just me crying during movies when something sad happens i.e. I cried during grumpy old men when the one guy had a heart attack. He was fine and the movie was funny but I sobbed for awhile.

Being slightly clomid crazy is normal. It's only temporary so don't sweat it!

lauriemel

I don't know that I have any coping tactics to share.  I just wanted to say I know how you feel.  I did my first round of Clomid last week and the first day was an absolute bear! 

Hopefully this will be your cycle and you won't have to worry about it.  If you do have to do another round, maybe it will help just to know what you're in for, KWIM?  Now that you've experienced the side effects once, you can prepare yourself a little bit better for it next time around. 

I agree with PP who said not to make any major life decisions during the time you're on your meds.  Also, maybe schedule some special pampering for yourself during Clomid time.  It doesn't have to be expensive.  Even if you just pencil in a bubble bath or a quiet night in, giving yourself a little extra TLC might be helpful.

larhun3

mandaj02:

My OBGYN had me on it for five months unmonitored before sending me to a fertility clinic. He didn't seem to even realize what he was doing until after I told him how long we had been doing it. He finally referred me. After I leave the fertility clinic, I will be finding a new OBGYN. Once I went to the consultation we made a plan, I took one month off in between. I then had IUI with Clomid and Ovidrel. I just had my second IUI and think that I am BFN again and will be going for a third IUI. So in total, I'll have been on Clomid for 8 out of 9 months and have not been on the same treatment. This will be my last IUI and last month with Clomid. I'm not making these decisions on my own, they're treatments made by a specialist. I've never heard anything about a lifetime maximum of 6 rounds or had a doctor mention that. nbsp;

Ya you need to find new doctors. Clomid has a lifetime max of 6 TOTAL cycles because it has been linked to cancer. I cant believe you took something for 5 months because your dr "didnt realize" you were on it for that long. Didnt a red flag go up in your mind? And your specialist shouldn't continue clomid bc you are over 6 cycles.

My RE recommends 3 cycles per treatment i.e. 3 TI and clomid, 3 clomid and IUi, etc. if a treatment is going to work it's most likely to occur within 3 attempts. We just had our third IUI with clomid. If I don't get a BFP we are moving on.

KdgTeacher

mandaj02:

My OBGYN had me on it for five months (unmonitored) before sending me to a fertility clinic. He didn't seem to even realize what he was doing until after I told him how long we had been doing it. He finally referred me. After I leave the fertility clinic, I will be finding a new OBGYN. Once I went to the consultation we made a plan, I took one month off in between. I then had IUI with Clomid and Ovidrel. I just had my second IUI and think that I am BFN again and will be going for a third IUI. So in total, I'll have been on Clomid for 8 out of 9 months and have not been on the same treatment. This will be my last IUI and last month with Clomid. I'm not making these decisions on my own, they're treatments made by a specialist. I've never heard anything about a lifetime maximum of 6 rounds or had a doctor mention that.  

You didn't talk about whaat you'd done with a previouys doctor before starting treatment with a new one??  Seriously?  How is taking Clomid 8 times not the same treatment? 

It is a known fact that more than 6 cycles in your lifetime has a link to cancer increase.

 

jschwind22

mandaj02:

My OBGYN had me on it for five months (unmonitored) before sending me to a fertility clinic. He didn't seem to even realize what he was doing until after I told him how long we had been doing it. He finally referred me. After I leave the fertility clinic, I will be finding a new OBGYN. Once I went to the consultation we made a plan, I took one month off in between. I then had IUI with Clomid and Ovidrel. I just had my second IUI and think that I am BFN again and will be going for a third IUI. So in total, I'll have been on Clomid for 8 out of 9 months and have not been on the same treatment. This will be my last IUI and last month with Clomid. I'm not making these decisions on my own, they're treatments made by a specialist. I've never heard anything about a lifetime maximum of 6 rounds or had a doctor mention that.  

Long term usage of Clomid is associated with a higher risk of ovarian cancer, in addition to potential permanent thinning of your lining.  A few sources:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0000752/

https://products.sanofi.com.au/aus_pi_clomid.pdf

https://www.webmd.com/drugs/drug-11204-Clomid+Oral.aspx?drugid=11204&drugname=Clomid+Oral&source=1

https://www.fertilitytoday.org/fertility_drugs.html

https://www.medicinenet.com/clomiphene-oral/article.htm

mandaj02

When you are referred to a fertility clinic they get all of your records of previous treatments. We had a long consultation about what to do.I don't really appreciate the "how could you" comments. I haven't been through this before, I just assumed when the first doctor put me on Clomid that that was a common thing to do when TTC on your own wasn't working. I said in my post that I planned on finding a new OBGYN after I am turned back over. And it's not the same plan because these two cycles have been monitored, had Ovidrel, washing of the sperm and an IUI. I'm not sure how that's all the same treatment? 

Thank you for the helpful links, I will check into it. I am on this board for support during a really difficult time. Not to be attacked or to be made to feel like I am stupid. It's bad enough, I didn't come on here to be judged and talked down to. 

KdgTeacher

When you are referred to a fertility clinic they get all of your records of previous treatments. We had a long consultation about what to do.I don't really appreciate the "how could you" comments. No one made a "how could you" comment I haven't been through this before, I just assumed when the first doctor put me on Clomid that that was a common thing to do when TTC on your own wasn't working. I said in my post that I planned on finding a new OBGYN after I am turned back over. And it's not the same plan because these two cycles have been monitored, had Ovidrel, washing of the sperm and an IUI. I'm not sure how that's all the same treatment?  You're using the same medicine over and over again.

Thank you for the helpful links, I will check into it. I am on this board for support during a really difficult time. Not to be attacked or to be made to feel like I am stupid. It's bad enough, I didn't come on here to be judged and talked down to. Oh right, pointing out that dangerous things going on is attacking, judging, and talking down to. 

jschwind22

mandaj02:

When you are referred to a fertility clinic they get all of your records of previous treatments. We had a long consultation about what to do.I don't really appreciate the "how could you" comments. I haven't been through this before, I just assumed when the first doctor put me on Clomid that that was a common thing to do when TTC on your own wasn't working. I said in my post that I planned on finding a new OBGYN after I am turned back over. And it's not the same plan because these two cycles have been monitored, had Ovidrel, washing of the sperm and an IUI. I'm not sure how that's all the same treatment? 

Thank you for the helpful links, I will check into it. I am on this board for support during a really difficult time. Not to be attacked or to be made to feel like I am stupid. It's bad enough, I didn't come on here to be judged and talked down to. 

I am not trying to offend you, but I am honestly scared for you.  I hope you take this information as an opportunity to learn about the drugs that you are putting in your body and be an advocate for your own health.

mandaj02

Yes, you're right, this was very helpful, "You didn't talk about whaat you'd done with a previouys doctor before starting treatment with a new one??  Seriously?  How is taking Clomid 8 times not the same treatment?"

larhun3

mandaj02:

When you are referred to a fertility clinic they get all of your records of previous treatments. We had a long consultation about what to do.I don't really appreciate the "how could you" comments. I haven't been through this before, I just assumed when the first doctor put me on Clomid that that was a common thing to do when TTC on your own wasn't working. I said in my post that I planned on finding a new OBGYN after I am turned back over. And it's not the same plan because these two cycles have been monitored, had Ovidrel, washing of the sperm and an IUI. I'm not sure how that's all the same treatment?nbsp;Thank you for the helpful links, I will check into it. I am on this board for support during a really difficult time. Not to be attacked or to be made to feel like I am stupid. It's bad enough, I didn't come on here to be judged and talked down to.nbsp;

Pretty sure we all know what happens during an RE consultation. Our point is you shouldn't be on clomid anymore. You need to be your advocate and research what you are doing. You could be hurting your chances bc clomid thins your lining. Get over your ego and listen to what we r saying. We r all here bc we've had trouble but the difference between us and you is that we all take active participation in our treatment and what we put into our bodies. None of us passively allow doctors to do things without questioning why or appropriateness. If you don't like it then this isn't the place for you. Try baby gaga or baby center if you want rainbows and puppies and "support". We r trying to give u support by pointing out the flaws to u.

KdgTeacher

mandaj02:

Yes, you're right, this was very helpful, "You didn't talk about whaat you'd done with a previouys doctor before starting treatment with a new one??  Seriously?  How is taking Clomid 8 times not the same treatment?"

There is a quote button right by the reply button, FWIW.

Sorry that it is shocking to me that those details wouldn't be reviewed during that RE appt.

Color me crazy for making sure my doctor knows what I've already done.

Good luck to ya

larhun3

mandaj02:

Yes, you're right, this was very helpful, "You didn't talk about whaat you'd done with a previouys doctor before starting treatment with a new one??nbsp; Seriously?nbsp; How is taking Clomid 8 times not the same treatment?"

Honestly you can't reason with stupid. Take clomid for another 8 months...I really don't give a fck. You just started posting. Silly me for thinking you'd want to know if your dr was doing something wrong. Obviously you know better despite that everyone else is giving u the exact same advice.

Twinkie0612

KdgTeacher:

When you are referred to a fertility clinic they get all of your records of previous treatments. We had a long consultation about what to do.I don't really appreciate the "how could you" comments. No one made a "how could you" comment I haven't been through this before, I just assumed when the first doctor put me on Clomid that that was a common thing to do when TTC on your own wasn't working. I said in my post that I planned on finding a new OBGYN after I am turned back over. And it's not the same plan because these two cycles have been monitored, had Ovidrel, washing of the sperm and an IUI. I'm not sure how that's all the same treatment?  You're using the same medicine over and over again.

Thank you for the helpful links, I will check into it. I am on this board for support during a really difficult time. Not to be attacked or to be made to feel like I am stupid. It's bad enough, I didn't come on here to be judged and talked down to. Oh right, pointing out that dangerous things going on is attacking, judging, and talking down to. 

KDG how dare you show concern for another's well being. You should be ashamed.

mandaj02

Wow, I really don't need added stress especially from an online chat board. To say that you can't reason with stupid or that the difference between you and I is that you take an active role or to say that you don't get a F, how rude. Thank you for words of advice and I get it, talk to my doctor about stopping Clomid. I think that could have been stated without a lot of the other posts. I won't be posting here again.

BTW, I came on this post to give some encouragement to the OP, maybe you could try to do the same in the future.  

pgermain11

Hey OP. I'm also having the Clomid crazies. Last night was my 2nd pill and today I woke up super bitchy and insanely irritable. The hot flashes during the night are pretty awful too.

It's just a couple of days so try to put things in perspective when you're getting upset. Tell yourself that whatever you are feeling, you will go back after you are done taking the Clomid and think about that then! 

GL! 

jschwind22

mandaj02:

Wow, I really don't need added stress especially from an online chat board. To say that you can't reason with stupid or that the difference between you and I is that you take an active role or to say that you don't get a F, how rude. Thank you for words of advice and I get it, talk to my doctor about stopping Clomid. I think that could have been stated without a lot of the other posts. I won't be posting here again.

BTW, I came on this post to give some encouragement to the OP, maybe you could try to do the same in the future.  

Are you so butthurt that you missed all of the advice and resources that I gave you?  GBCB.

larhun3

mandaj02:

Wow, I really don't need added stress especially from an online chat board. To say that you can't reason with stupid or that the difference between you and I is that you take an active role or to say that you don't get a F, how rude. Thank you for words of advice and I get it, talk to my doctor about stopping Clomid. I think that could have been stated without a lot of the other posts. I won't be posting here again.BTW, I came on this post to give some encouragement to the OP, maybe you could try to do the same in the future. nbsp;

Pretty sure it was stated nicely first. I did offer OP encouragement...see above. Like I said try baby gaga or baby center...I think it's a better fit for your bsc self.

Twinkie0612

I was super b!tchy my last day of Clomid, but part of it could have been that I was under extra stress at work.  I felt really sad the first few days after I stopped taking Clomid, but that could have been fueled by my anxiety over our first medicated cycle.  Since O I have felt fine and overall Clomid wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.

Kittymom6

OP, I don't have any coping tactics but wanted to say you're not alone!

This was my first cycle taking Clomid. I was very emotional and weepy. My hubby and I were watching TV one night and he turned to say something to me. I was bawling over a Halloween commercial. I was prepared for the "Clomid rage", but I found that I just felt depressed and really unhappy during the 5 days of taking it.

PPs have said to take it at night. For me, I think that might have helped with other side effects like headaches and hot flashes, but not the emotions. Keeping it in perspective - this is the impact of the meds, not how I'm actually feeling - also helped to some extent. Also, for anxiety and stress in general, yoga really helps me.

Good luck to you! 

Laylarue

I was a crazy woman on Clomid! Besides all the hot flashes, I was an emotional wreck. I'm not sure what you can do about the side effects, but I just started listening to Circle Bloom guided visualization and it seems to relax me. I find it helps with stress management from dealing with IF.

If that's not your style then maybe yoga or meditation can at least give you a breather from it. Good luck!

ZenGal13

Thanks to everyone who offered insights and made me feel less alone with your suggestions. I really appreciate it.