First I would like to thank all of you for your thoughts that you post they have really helped me. It has taken me a while to make my own intro and not sure why today but here I am and here is my story.
I found out at my 13 week appt that I was pregnant with twins. My husband and I were so very excited and so were my two older children, my son 6yrs and my daughter 4yrs. My dr scheduled us another ultrasound for the following week just to get some better pictures of both babies. So my husband and I took both of our other children thinking everything was fine because everything was fine just the week before. Very early into the ultrasound the tech said that she had to leave and ask what pictures the dr wanted. I thought this was very strange and with both of my other children the tech never walked out of the room. When she came back she brought with her the head of her department. Why he did not ask the tech to take my children out of the room I will never know. He then told us that both of our boys did not have a heartbeat. I wish I could say that I kept my emotions together in front of my children but I didn't. This is something that has haunted me since.
The next day they did another ultrasound to confirm and then the day after that (Aug. 30th) they took me in for surgery to take the babies. I have been a mess since. I have been a really good faker for my children but when I am alone all I think about is the babies and all the what if's. My husband and I had all the testes done that we could and nothing came back abnormal. No one can tell us why this has happened. This board has really been the only helpful thing that I have found. Thanks again ladies.