Late Term and Child Loss

Ticker warning. Need Advice Please for a Difficult Question reposted from 2nd tri

Hi Ladies, I am a lurker here from 2nd tri.nbsp; I have been debating about whether or not to ask my question on this board so here goes.
My DH and I are supposed to find out next month about if our baby is a boy or a girl.nbsp; My concern is that the same week is the first anniversary of his daughters death.nbsp; She was 28 and his youngest.nbsp;nbsp; I am concerned that his grief and depression will come back with a vengance when he sees the baby on the ultrasound.nbsp;I am also worried that, if the baby is a girl, that he will come to resent her all because of the timing of the test.nbsp; Would you recommend I reschedule for a better time for him?nbsp; Or do you think I am just not giving him enough credit for how strong he is?nbsp;
I have spoken with him about thisnbsp;twice.nbsp; Both times henbsp;seemednbsp;to just brush it off.nbsp; He says that we will be fine. I know that we, our relationship, will be fine. It is his state of mind that worries me.nbsp; After her passing, he came very close to committing suicide and I am selfish enough to want to avoid that if at all possible.nbsp;nbsp;Your thoughts and input would be greatly appreciated. nbsp;nbsp;
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Re: Ticker warning. Need Advice Please for a Difficult Question reposted from 2nd tri

  • Please add a ticker warning for your post.

    I imagine you know your DH better than anyone else, so I would go by what you think he would appreciate best in his heart (as loss parents, sometimes we do what is best for others, even though it hurts us).

    If it was me, I would prefer to have it at a different week. First anniversaries are very hard. Either way, the anniversary will be on his mind and in his heart when he goes to the appointment (I'm sure his daughter is always on his mind). It's not a matter of strength... even the strongest parent in the world is forever broken when they lose their child. Good luck for your appt and many good thoughts to your DH.

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